The Columbo part: This little detective story begins two weeks ago when Bossy’s farm-grown tomato plants decided to turn themselves inside out. To restore Bossy’s faith in her garden, she planted rows and rows of zinnia seeds, which promptly emerged from the soil and began to thrive:
But then one day Bossy woke up, which is quite the mystery alone—and in this case, she woke up and drifted out to her garden where she discovered that many of her thriving zinnia plants had been chewed down to the neck:
At first Bossy considered the possibility that a certain house wren was the perpetrator, as she collected the furnishings necessary to transform the newly vacated kids’ room into a home office:
But then Bossy spied the following suspect within close proximity of the crime scene:
Before Bossy issues the Miranda Rights, any opinions?
Next: the Gassy part. Yesterday Bossy attended her annual Block Party, which actually encompasses six blocks and should be referred to as the annual Blocks Party—but in whatever case all Bossy is saying is pulled pork, thai noodles, shrimp kebabs, chicken satay, devilled eggs, ziti, brownies, mojitos, mojitos, mojitos.
Bossy can’t wait to tell you more about the annual Blocks Party, just as soon as she inserts a catheter between her fifth and sixth rib and withdraws the