The above photo represents a stack of DVDs from Bossy’s local library, and hello one person left who doesn’t know Bossy and her friend Martha are watching DVDs in the middle of gloriously temperate afternoons better spent gardening because Bossy and her friend Martha are halfway through a 5-day cleanse to reset their bad habits, where bad habit equals watching DVDs in the middle of gloriously temperate afternoons.
The first DVD Bossy and Martha watched was The Office, starring the multi-talented Ricky Gervais, who has perfected the art of the charming git:
Bossy wasn’t two minutes into Episode One when she announced she would do Ricky Gervais in a heartbeat — and speaking of heartbeat, hi Bossy’s dad! How’s the humerus?
Anyway. Ricky Gervais isn’t handsome in the classic sense. He’s not even classically handsome. And yet there is something about him besides his amazing humor and smarts, which Bossy refers to as reason enough.
And then Bossy realized the additional reason for her crush: it’s his eyeteeth:
Eyeteeth, otherwise known as cuspids or canines or dogteeth or, the news gets worse, fangs, are located on both sides of the mouth between the incisors and the premolars.
Bossy has a real thing for eyeteeth, specifically pokey eyeteeth. When explaining why to her friend Martha, which was a little like preaching to a choir already singing a song of Eyetooth Love, Bossy was quick to point to the example of David Bowie:
Although, speaking of David Bowie, it looks to Bossy like he’s had some work done to his classic smile in the intervening years:
And, hey, did you know we were still speaking of David Bowie? Yes we are, because Bossy is too protein deprived to think of paragraph transitions. Insert sentence transition here Bossy always sort of wondered how tall David Bowie is, and this morning while perusing google she found the definitive answer:
Then Bossy’s friend Martha corroborated Bossy’s pokey eyeteeth fetish by providing the example of Aimee Mann:
And about those two previous photos? Bossy admits it became easier to find Aimee Mann images on google after Bossy stopped spelling her name Ammee Maaann. Hello, hypoglycemia.