Once upon a time Bossy’s bicycle lived free range in a bucolic suburb. The small town grocery store, community pool, public library, these were the happy places Bossy’s bicycle visited on a routine basis, untethered:
But then Bossy moved back to the city of her youth:
Bossy’s city has become quite the bicycle town in the intervening years since Bossy left to live in a place where she could ride on the sidewalks without fear of prosecution for Violation of Regulations and Penalties Chapter 12-800.
When Bossy was a girl, very few cyclists braved the car-addled Philadelphia streets — and when those cyclists were inevitably injured, there were even fewer cyclists.
But for the past decade, the Mayor’s Office of Transportation and Utilities has transformed the dangerous streets of Bossy’s childhood into 200 miles of dangerous bike lanes!
Before moving to the city, Bossy spent a day locating Bossy’s long ago purchased rusty dusty bike lock, and the accompanying rusty dusty bike lock key. This was because Bossy decided she was going to begin her new city life with new healthy habits, such as riding her bike to the liquor store! And she would need to lock the bike once there.
And that first time, as Bossy pulled onto the sidewalk she never left, it occurred to Bossy she didn’t even know how to use her bike lock for optimal protection!
So she looked it up. Here are those instructions:
- Place your bike against an object with the chain facing out
- It helps if the object is a fixed, immovable object
- Remove the front wheel and lock it near the rear wheel
- Remain married so you have a man to remove the front wheel and lock it near the rear wheel
If you liked this post about Bossy’s bicycle, read this post about the time Bossy and her son fought during a camping trip over a wet bike seat.
Or click this link for Bossy’s post about the wonderful horrible no good very bad Philadelphia City Hall.