I waitressed for a Vietnamese restaurant when I was high school, and I remember giggling over those SAME MISSPELLINGS in 1984. Apparently the packaging never gets updated, but you know, why change a good thing?!
The more immature of us on the staff used to really press our luck with the “Now you can pick up anything” bit. Yeah, um…not so much.
I lived in China briefly and things like that were everywhere. I had a friend who was hired to go around Beijing and make note of all the misspellings on the English signs so they could be corrected before the Beijing Olympics.
Yikes! I just don’t understand how atrocities such as this occur. As a Spanish major at school I have never had an issue with spelling; the same goes for many of my classmates.
Pick up anything, like a social disease? Pick up anything, like a loser looking for an available woman with opposable thumbs? Pick up anything, like– stop me– even I think I’ve gone too far…
I’ve always said, “We ARE here to judge, but if the food’s good, I’ll forgive the wrappings.” Words to live by…
by coincidence i have a pair of disposable chop sticks right here from when i was brought take out sushi. though the instructions say the same thing (except for the bit about the chinese restaurant) everything is spelled correctly.
Once in a Very Odd Country (not the USA) I bought some bottled water with its label in English-they-thought, and mulled over what exactly the label’s statement “SUFFLED AS SHE GUSH” might mean.
(Finally decided it might indicate the water was bottled at the source?)
TheWordWire says
August 24, 2009 at 11:08 amThis is hilarious even if you don’t add “in bed” to the end of every phrase. I would bet your fortune wasn’t this entertaining.
Kim @ What's That Smell? says
August 24, 2009 at 11:16 amThat is hysterical. At least it has illustrations in case you can’t understand the engrish.
Barb - WillThink4Wine says
August 24, 2009 at 11:32 amI can assure you that their English is far better than my Chinese!
v. says
August 24, 2009 at 11:51 amPhunnie!
David says
August 24, 2009 at 11:59 amI brought a pair of chopsticks to the bar last night but they didn’t help me pick up anything!
MariaV says
August 24, 2009 at 12:06 pmToo frunny!
Gail K. says
August 24, 2009 at 12:50 pmI remember the first time I read those instructions on a set of chopsticks- I about died laughing!
Melanie @ Mel, A Dramatic Mommy says
August 24, 2009 at 1:09 pmWhere’s the instructions for adding the rubber band so us uncoordinated folks can still use them?
(PS- I WAS misspelling my name!)
NaysWay says
August 24, 2009 at 1:12 pmThose aren’t misspellings. Those are abominations!
ranchgirl says
August 24, 2009 at 1:22 pmI waitressed for a Vietnamese restaurant when I was high school, and I remember giggling over those SAME MISSPELLINGS in 1984. Apparently the packaging never gets updated, but you know, why change a good thing?!
The more immature of us on the staff used to really press our luck with the “Now you can pick up anything” bit. Yeah, um…not so much.
junebug says
August 24, 2009 at 1:30 pmThanks for the instructions. I went and got my chopsticks and now I too can pick up anything.
Half Assed Kitchen says
August 24, 2009 at 1:32 pmEven with those fine instructions, I have to use the kids’ chopsticks.
GreatAunt says
August 24, 2009 at 1:48 pmDear Half Assed Kitchen: Even with those fine instructions, I have to use a fork. Seriously.
monnik says
August 24, 2009 at 2:10 pmMy eyes! That hurts to look at!
Do you think they know the mistakes are there by now and think the misuse of English is a charming bit of the Chinese food experience on the wrapper?
Meg at the Members Lounge says
August 24, 2009 at 2:51 pmThat’s even funnier than the part of the menu that says:
“Because the 7 rums make it so”….
Cactus Petunia says
August 24, 2009 at 3:05 pmIt just keeps getting better and better as you read on down, doesn’t it!
Meg says
August 24, 2009 at 3:11 pmOh good, NOW I know exactly what to do. I was wondering. Thanks, Bossy!
Tiaras & Tantrums says
August 24, 2009 at 3:14 pmhee he e- go over to China and you will see this everywhere!!
William says
August 24, 2009 at 3:18 pmThe originai position is in the Kama Sutra
Lovelyn says
August 24, 2009 at 4:14 pmI lived in China briefly and things like that were everywhere. I had a friend who was hired to go around Beijing and make note of all the misspellings on the English signs so they could be corrected before the Beijing Olympics.
Adria says
August 24, 2009 at 5:06 pmYikes! I just don’t understand how atrocities such as this occur. As a Spanish major at school I have never had an issue with spelling; the same goes for many of my classmates.
jeanne Greenwald says
August 24, 2009 at 8:34 pmlike #20, i was in china and took so many photos of the funny interpretations and spelling of english. just hilarious.
Kimi says
August 24, 2009 at 8:45 pmWhile visiting Japan, I saw on the back on a toilet stall door a sign that read “Please do not flash the paper towel at the toilet”. funny stuff……
Happily Employed Susan says
August 24, 2009 at 8:55 pmThat Chinese chopstick wrapper’s English is better than most of what I read on Facebook, and there’s no LOLs or exclamation points!!!!!! LOL!!!
Tracy says
August 24, 2009 at 9:11 pmMy husband just got back from a week in China and the handicap bathrooms said “For Deformed Man” on them!!
Cupcake Murphy says
August 24, 2009 at 9:37 pmThank god I read this. I totally need something to help me move my 98 ton stove so I can clean behind it.
Leah says
August 24, 2009 at 10:20 pmPick up anything, like a social disease? Pick up anything, like a loser looking for an available woman with opposable thumbs? Pick up anything, like– stop me– even I think I’ve gone too far…
I’ve always said, “We ARE here to judge, but if the food’s good, I’ll forgive the wrappings.” Words to live by…
Chesapeake Bay Woman says
August 24, 2009 at 11:15 pmOh good. Since I now can pick up anything, how about Kevin Bacon? I’ll have him firmly under my thurnb in no time flat.
heyjoe says
August 24, 2009 at 11:37 pmI am sorry for my absence as of late. I am soon to be laid off. All time spent reading blogs is now spent looking for work. It really blows.
I’ll be back.
The Great Getzby says
August 24, 2009 at 11:56 pmThe best part is that this was a THAI place — it wasn’t even Chinese! “Welcome to Chinese restaurant.”
amy says
August 25, 2009 at 12:27 amApparently warped in translation. Or Lost?
naomi says
August 25, 2009 at 12:35 amby coincidence i have a pair of disposable chop sticks right here from when i was brought take out sushi. though the instructions say the same thing (except for the bit about the chinese restaurant) everything is spelled correctly.
must be a canadian thing.
kate says
August 25, 2009 at 12:56 ami’m a little bit disappoined that it didn’t say somethig dirty by accident.
meera says
August 25, 2009 at 5:08 amI kid Bossy not….this is the page I was reading before I typed “iambossy.com” into the address bar…..*goosebumps*….
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/8219427.stm
operagal says
August 25, 2009 at 6:02 amheyjoe – sorry to hear that – what do you do in the real world?
someone needs to explain how to eat rice w/these damn things – I notice the photo shows something the size of dim sum.
Reeb says
August 25, 2009 at 6:27 pmOnce in a Very Odd Country (not the USA) I bought some bottled water with its label in English-they-thought, and mulled over what exactly the label’s statement “SUFFLED AS SHE GUSH” might mean.
(Finally decided it might indicate the water was bottled at the source?)
Mack says
August 25, 2009 at 10:28 pmI like that – “Now you can pick up ANYTHING”
I am going to go down to my local hardware store and buy me some chopsticks.
Me Thinks says
August 26, 2009 at 8:41 amHmmm… I have those same exact chopsticks sitting on my desk and looked at them as I read this.
You will be happy to know: They FIXED the mis-spellings!!!
Capitalization and punctuation errors still there though…
Texas Susan says
August 26, 2009 at 12:24 pmTotally hilarious!! We always like seeing that “shrimps” are on the menu!
Ungirdled Passion says
August 27, 2009 at 9:15 amShoot! Was hoping to be the tirst to comment!