Bossy found this amazing new product she’s been using every day for
one year one night and she just has to tell you about it:
Founded in 1851 as a New York City apothecary, Kiehl’s rhymes with heels—
or maybe it rhymes with bile, or possibly hay-balls or be-hee-eh-el-sszz. The point is: this isn’t just a facial moisturizer—it’s a concentrated firming serum rejuvenation treatment with Cryste and Marine tossed in.
Here’s how it works: first you squeeze a few drops from your 1.7 fluid ounce bottle which costs $50:
Gently tap the serum on and around your
Posturepedic Memory Foam™
And don’t forget the
continental divide wrinkles around your brow area:
You won’t believe the improvement after just one application:
All this reminds Bossy that the last time she went to her local Wholesale Warehouse, she bought the following product to return:
Bossy got so excited when she spied the Regenerist Eye Lifting Serum next to the Fresh Step® Scoopable Litter because Bossy once read a favorable review of the Olay products:
But Bossy is still deciding if she should keep her Olay product or instead exchange it for something that will produce more dramatic results—like perhaps the following Dermitage product she saw advertised right here on her
kristin saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 11:52 am
currently, my face resembles the before woman in the dermitage ad because i have willingly lasered the hell out of it… the expression, “going to look worse before it looks better” has never been more appropriate.
corrie saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 11:55 am
I want those dots around my eyes!
Congrats on the no boogers, BTW..
Laura saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 11:58 am
Courtney Cox-Arquette uses it and her skin is flawless. I have been going back & forth about Botox-my sister is a Derm and I may be her guinea pig. I need it between the big divide……….
The Domestic Goddess saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 11:59 am
I dunno. I’ve been using the MK cult stuff and I’m liking it. Strange. I swore I wouldn’t yield, and yet I did. I think it’s because they KNOW WE DON’T WANT TO LOOK OLD.
David saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 12:16 pm
It is indeed pronounced like heels, or eels, or congeals.
On the rare occasion I decide to splurge and lay out $5 for a lip balm, I usually ransack the hell out of the free samples. They have some crazy shit.
dlyn saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 12:23 pm
I could not get my order for Dermitage in fast enough, once I saw it here on your blog. Gonna try it on the neighbor’s shar pei first though.
Dharmamama saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 12:30 pm
Silly Laura! The big divide is *supposed* to be like that! It’s what makes us women! Or did you mean something else?
Nilsa S. saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 12:48 pm
Either way, Bossy must bring lots of SPF for her cross-country trip. So, she doesn’t reverse the positive steps of firming.
Tammy saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 12:48 pm
You crack me up.
I tried the Natural Advantage shiz that Jane Seymour pushes on the infomercials.
My result? I had an allergic reaction and looked like I had friggin leprosy.
Natural Advantage? Not.So.Much.
For now – I’ll keep my wrinkles.
andrea saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 12:56 pm
I need something so that I won’t look like I’m a close relative to Rocky Raccoon if I get two minutes less of sleep than normal. The five layers of concealer just ain’t cuttin’ it.
Maddy saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 1:05 pm
I’m a sucker for the hype too, must be getting desperate, or maybe just old.
Happy Valentines day to you too!
All Adither saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 1:10 pm
Nope. I’ve already done my plastic surgery for this life time (read: 2 nose jobs) and I won’t succumb….
err…until I’m 40.
terri saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 1:12 pm
I just go straight for the spackle,putty,face lift in a jar and my Sheer Cover! It looks great,just have to remember not to smile too big or my face will crack!
we_be_toys saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 1:26 pm
Gahhh! Under-eye luggage is such a drag! Maybe we should just refuse to grow old gracefully and go about it kicking and screaming – with a drink in hand, as anesthesia, of course!
Isn’t the BJ all about the Glam, girl?!
Elly saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 1:26 pm
Cryste face cream? Is it part of this line? http://www.reuters.com/article/lifestyleMolt/idUSSIN3658220080212
Ree saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 1:29 pm
I have heard that rubbing sperm, er serum around your eyes has a rejuvenating effect.
Grandma J saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 1:37 pm
Yeah, I’m definitely desperate for some Cryste and Marine thrown in.
I never realized how far over the edge I had gone until my sweet little granddaughter shocked me into reality.
The morning after her sleep-over, while lying in bed, she started tracing “something” on my face. I opened my eyes and smiled at the little three year old darling only to have her say, “Grandma, don’t smile so big, my fingers will get stuck in the cracks.”
Yea, I need some of that stuff.
Momo Fali saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 1:44 pm
Bossy said BJ’s and sperm…all in one post. Must be Valentine’s Day!
C saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 1:52 pm
i think you should return the oil of olay. i have it and it just made me break out. you should use hemmhorroid stuff on your bags and wrinkles and i PROMISE you will get the same results. Just use cetaphil cleanser and moisturizer on your face, use sunscreen and the H cream and i promise you the same results. And if you want to permanently remove wrinkles, get retin A or use BOOTS brand retin glop, found at CVS for 20. a tube. it really works. just don’t forget the sunscreen.
notjustbarbra saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 2:04 pm
What would we do without bossy to test stuff out for us? You are adding laugh lines to my face daily.
I’m oddly captivated by the BIG BLUE EYE.
Hotdog saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 2:07 pm
I think Bossy looks great. Maybe Bossy is too concerned with her physical appearance…
Kathy saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 2:16 pm
My local Target is carrying Kiehl’s now. I splurged on the Herbal Blue moisturizer and have been happily zit-free since. (My favorite zit zapper is still Neutrogena’s Clear Pore, which I guess was discontinued years ago.)
Alli ~Mrs. Fussypants saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 2:28 pm
I want those dots around my eyes, too.
I’ve never shopped at BJ’s, afraid I would giggle the whole time.
Foolery saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 2:34 pm
We don’t have BJs — the store, I mean — in my neck of the continent, but if we did I’d be just the tiniest bit hesitant to buy SERUM there.
laura saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 2:58 pm
Kiehl’s at Target??? Oh if only that was true in my area! I LOVE their lip balm (and tinted lip balm). I jmean I love it…if I weren’t marriedk, I would marry it (after all, it touches my lips more often than my husband does). Bossy–can we all give you a list of products we want you to try and review for us?? I desperately need something for my continental divide (it’s the only thing I’d ever consider something as drastic as botox for…otherwise I’ll look like a scowly old lady)
Wendy saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 3:01 pm
Can i use that firming stuff on my ass?
Noelle saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 3:01 pm
My friend gave me wrinkle cream for my 30th birthday. No time like the present to start giving over much of my income to goo.
Manic Mommy saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 3:04 pm
Don’t do it, Bossy! Don’t you see?
CRYSTE MARINE = CRYSTAL METH!
You only think you look wrinkle free! Then before you know it, you’re robbing CVS for more Sudafed.
jody saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 3:35 pm
Can i use that firming stuff on my ass?
LOL Wendy. I was going to ask if it would work on my sagging, tired, “nursed 4 kids” boobs.
Alice saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 4:03 pm
i bet plain ol’ sperm would probably work just as well.
Chesapeake Bay Woman saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 4:18 pm
Take the Olay back and get the cat litter instead. It will solve the dilemma of where to poop on your excellent road trip.
In other words, one worrisome shituation has been resolved.
lisa saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 4:30 pm
That wrinkly one always cracks me up. From 80 year old smoker to 16 year old virgin in two weeks!!
You did realize the stuff reinstated virginity, didn’t you?
Alex Elliot saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 5:30 pm
I like the above comment. You are simply hilarious, Bossy!
Jen M saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 6:42 pm
I can’t wait to try this. But…wait? Will that make me TOO CONCERNED WITH MY APPEARANCE?
Oh, I forgot. I already am.
For the bags – whatever product you use, try storing it in your refridgerator.
Mandy saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 6:55 pm
Hahaha… I know you probably get this all the time but I had to chime in, too… you’re hysterically funny!
flutter saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 7:54 pm
boogie free is the most important part
Haley saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 8:57 pm
Return the Olay and look into AVON’s ANEW Clinical Products. They are awesome, won’t warp your pocket book so bad, and most last awhile too.
I don’t sell AVON anymore, but trust me, any ANEW product won’t let your face down!
Surcie saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 9:36 pm
I love how it made your eyes super-piercingly blue!
liv saysFebruary 14, 2008 at 10:04 pm
bossy rules. perricone face firming activator pretty much rules, too.
Jenn @ Juggling Life saysFebruary 15, 2008 at 1:29 am
I am very impressed with Bossy’s willingness to share her unmade up face with us in the interests of cosmetic science.
For the continental divide I use an old-fashioned product called “bangs.”
Dr. Monkey saysFebruary 15, 2008 at 2:20 am
So that’s what Kiehls has been doing with all the man spackle I’ve been sending them.
Suzanne saysFebruary 15, 2008 at 2:53 am
I like the Olay Eye Lifting Serum, though I did treat myself to a tube of Stri-Vectin eye cream on my birthday a couple of months ago. I use the Stri-Vectin at night and the Olay in the morning before make up, and I must say the Stri-Vectin definitely helped tighten up the upper lids.
The Olay works better on undereye bags and dark circles, though. Hence the AM/PM routine. It also helps both last longer so I don’t feel as bad about paying as much for the Stri-Vectin as I did. If it lasts me three months or longer, it’s totally worth it!
Or so I like to tell myself when I’m checking out my eyes in the mirror.
Mr Farty saysFebruary 15, 2008 at 7:30 am
Thank fook I don’t have wrinkles.
What? These are laughter lines. From reading too much BOSSY.
Jacki saysFebruary 15, 2008 at 7:51 am
You are too funny!
Strizz saysFebruary 15, 2008 at 11:00 am
Damn that chick went from 85 to thirty two. And those women in the last pics look way different. HAR HAR HAR knee slap.
Annie saysFebruary 15, 2008 at 11:05 am
Ok, that simulated image of the woman with wrinkles was very nightmare inducing. Especially with that nearly closed left eye of hers. It shall haunt me forever!
Ok, well at least for the amount of time it takes me to move onto the next blog and settle in.
lintys saysFebruary 15, 2008 at 12:28 pm
Bossy is so funny! Thanks for the laughs!
I got some Kiehl’s products for Christmas. I love them. Especially the shampoo and conditioner.
College Mama saysFebruary 15, 2008 at 12:51 pm
I use Renova and it’s amazing stuff. You need a prescription but it’s worth it.
I’m SO glad that ad for Dermitage indicates that the images were simulated because I was almost fooled into thinking otherwise 😉
Redneck Mommy saysFebruary 15, 2008 at 3:57 pm
I use mayo. Just smear it on a sandwich and presto! I instantly feel less wrinkled.
Or, as my son likes to say, “less striped.”
Because one needs fewer stripes on their foreheads.
Kristin saysFebruary 15, 2008 at 5:45 pm
Omigosh–I’m at work on lunch break and this post made me laugh until I cried. I picked up a nearby (used) napkin to dry my tears but there was tomato smooge on the napkin (from me . . . not someone else . . . ) ]
The tears are gone, but now I have a tomato seed in my eye. But the good thing is that it made my eye swell up, thereby eradicating the crowsfeet! And there you have it, a new temporary (and almost free) cure for wrinkles ; ) (oh–and that little emoticon isn’t me winking, it’s me in pain because I have a tomato seed in my eye . . . )
Mrs. Hyde saysFebruary 17, 2008 at 10:13 am
I got Botox in December. Just enough to get rid of the stripes on my forehead. AWESOME! Didn’t hurt and I look totally normal, just without lines!
thanks for the product advice. Now I know who to go to!
Jenny, Bloggess saysFebruary 18, 2008 at 3:07 pm
That olay lady has the most colorful tumors.
Lori saysFebruary 19, 2008 at 6:35 pm
Simulated images? You think?
Tina C saysAugust 13, 2011 at 5:51 am
For the divide, I love sticking on “Frownies” every night. Cheap and simple.
who saysDecember 16, 2011 at 5:18 am
Why trade one for the other? You should be able to switch from one to the other whenever you want. Hell why can’t a woman use both at the same time if she wanted?
Darla saysMay 27, 2014 at 3:48 pm
Hilarious! My luke arm coffee, from my mouth to laptop! Perfect for the keyboard I hear!