Orlistat — also known as Xenical®, tetrahydrolipstatin, C29H53NO5, 1-(3-hexyl-4-oxo-oxetan-2-yl)tridecan-2-yl 2-formylamino-4-methyl-pentanoate, or the little tablet that turns your poo orange, is a prescription diet pill.
Usually taken three times a day with meals, the pill prevents the absorption of 25% of the fat you consume. This is because it inhibits pancreatic lipase, which is an enzyme that hshheo sksoarkr chjfdjfir kfkfeopv in the intestine. The undigested fat is than excreted. On the john. Side effects include loose, urgent, oil poops. Side affects include blushing and difficulty breathing.
Which is why it’s such terrific news that the Food and Drug Administration announced yesterday that Orlistat is now available over-the-counter without a prescription. The marketers of the pill carefully chose the name Alli to indicate a weight-loss partnership with consumers, which unfortunately doesn’t stop Bossy from pronouncing it Al-lee.
Do not take the pill if you are pregnant, nursing, have a transplanted organ, diabetes, thyroid disease, kidney problems, gallbladder issues, or think poorly of passing gas like the winds on Lake St. Clair.