Dear John Cusack,
It’s been a while since Bossy has written, but your new movie opens today.
It’s About A Boy about a guy who adopts an eccentric kid. When asked why you accepted this role, you answered:
Oh darling, you couldn’t be more right. And while Bossy is honored you dedicated an entire interview answer to her, you really should stick to promoting your movie.
In Martian Child, your character is a science fiction writer who is grieving the loss of his wife, whatever. And so you adopt a kid and he has all sorts of weird quirks, like hanging around the living room:
Which makes you sit around at odd angles worrying about him:
But soon the two of you realize you have tons of really important things in common, like breakfast cereal:
And quicker than it takes Bossy to polish off a carton of Buncha Crunch and a medium popcorn, you and the boy are sharing very intimate moments, just the two of you:
And speaking of just the two of you, suddenly a love interest drops from the sky into this father-son movie, and that love interest is Amanda Peet. And even though you personally negotiated to get her a role in Martian Child, Bossy wants you to know she’s not the least bit concerned about that cross-eyed Amanda Peet.
Because Bossy is way too mature for petty jealousy. Or name-calling.
Love, Bossy.
sue says
November 9, 2007 at 11:34 amRe: my comment on yesterday’s main blog entry: wow, no sooner said than done. You bounce back fast, Bossy.
Janice in TX says
November 9, 2007 at 11:53 amI can’t remember the last time I laughed so hard…..or pee’d myself.
Howard says
November 9, 2007 at 11:56 amBack off, woman! He’s mine!
(BTW, I told me readers they all have to vote for you and stuff today)
Adorable Girlfriend says
November 9, 2007 at 12:11 pmYou are going all Oprah-Tom Cruise on us.
ali says
November 9, 2007 at 12:13 pmBossy is WAY hotter than Amanda Peet.
Kristabella says
November 9, 2007 at 12:15 pmAm I the only one who cannot stand Amanda Peet? In any movie?
Suzy says
November 9, 2007 at 12:17 pmYo Bosswoman, back off my husband. Capiche?
Julianne says
November 9, 2007 at 12:18 pmI’ve recently come to terms with the idea that I’ll probably never marry John Cusak. oh well.
However, that did not stop me from going to see Martian Child last night.
I had a really stressful day, and needed to decompress. What better way to do that then with my favorite big-screen guy?
Nilsa S. says
November 9, 2007 at 12:26 pmThey filmed many scenes from High Fidelity in my old neighborhood. I got to watch John Cusack film one scene from my living room window! Did you know the Cusack’s (John & Joan) pop into Chicago quite often? You should come visit sometime!
Alice says
November 9, 2007 at 12:27 pmoh my! i’d never even heard of this movie! perhaps i need to find a free 2 hour slot this weekend…
Laurie Foolery says
November 9, 2007 at 12:33 pmSince we’re going all “girlfriends” here, would this be the appropriate time to reveal my unhealthy affection for F. Murray Abraham?
No? Sorry.
Miss Britt says
November 9, 2007 at 12:36 pmYou make stalking so cool.
Evolving says
November 9, 2007 at 12:40 pmOMG. I LOVE IT when you stalk John Cusack. I wonder if anyone has showed him these. No, because if they did your adorable husband would be in danger of losing his place on the podium…
Mrs. G. says
November 9, 2007 at 12:46 pmI have had a thing for John since 1983, but this movie? All I can say is his face is the the best part of it…sappy.
meleah rebeccah says
November 9, 2007 at 1:02 pmI laughed so hard my head fell off.
Jennifer says
November 9, 2007 at 1:03 pmStalk away, he’s still mine.
He’s had me since “The Sure Thing”… no, since “Sixteen Candles”… or maybe it was “Class”… It doesn’t matter. My neighbor went to high school with him, knows his family, has their number, etc, etc, etc.
qt says
November 9, 2007 at 1:08 pmdude – has bossy ever thought about doing some private-investigative type work? You are so inconspicuous, I think it might work!
OMSH says
November 9, 2007 at 1:29 pmOh!! There have been so many horrible and so-so movies lately, but THIS … THIS looks fantabulous!
Thanks for the trailer link and heads up!
2shews says
November 9, 2007 at 1:30 pmHands off my Cusack, Bossy!
OK. We can share.
The Mom Bomb says
November 9, 2007 at 1:32 pmThat’s first-class stalking, right there. I daresay you even put Conan O’Brien’s stalking priest to shame with your stalky skillz. Now if you just give yourself a mohawk like DeNiro in Taxi Driver, no other stalkers will be able to touch you.
Dr. Monkey says
November 9, 2007 at 1:44 pmIt’s only fair Bossy, I’ve seen Ms. Peet’s rack in the movies, so if you want me to like you more then you better pony up and show me your rack.
fidget says
November 9, 2007 at 1:45 pmI’m always infinitely happy to find someone else with a John Cusack thing. My love for him is so pervasive I actually labeled a picture of my child in her baby book with : making her john cusack face
Moi says
November 9, 2007 at 1:49 pmLurve me some Cusack … since 16 Candles.
You crack me up woman.
Heather says
November 9, 2007 at 1:56 pmFavorite John Cusack movie (yes, you have to pick just one)? Mine is Grosse Pointe Blank.
jackie says
November 9, 2007 at 3:01 pmThe tears are rolling down my face. Stalking/peeking Bossy is cracking me up!
Manic Mommy says
November 9, 2007 at 3:32 pmAmanda Peet = not real actress
Bossy = Fabulous stalker/Photo Shop guru
I’ll say it again, we can double date with my husband, Kevin Bacon (Since I saw Footloose on a date with a nerd, how I’ve loved thee)
Phoenix says
November 9, 2007 at 3:40 pmUm Bossy, I think he’s taken. By ME!!!! Step off woman.
soNOTcool says
November 9, 2007 at 3:42 pmOh, no! I just realized that John Cusack is wearing John Travolta’s hair!!!!
Laura says
November 9, 2007 at 4:11 pmHere’s what my childhood friends and I would do when playing house-we’d all shout out the names of our husbands and it went something like this in sort of a sing-song tone: “I got David Cassidy!”, “I got Donny Osmond!”, “I got Bobby Sherman!” , “I got Davey Jones”. Then one of my little girlfriends was sooo disappointed b/c she wanted Donny Osmond and I claimed him first, but me being the Libra girl that I am, diplomatically replied: “That’s ok, you can have Donny Osmond, I’ll take Larry Kane.” True story and I am not sure why I am relating this to John Cusack, but oh well.
superblondgirl says
November 9, 2007 at 4:24 pmI love the image of you superimposed over Miranda. And that kid is bizarre-looking. He sort of scares me.
Noelle says
November 9, 2007 at 4:30 pmIf he wanted Amanda Peet in the movie so they could make something better than their last movie toghether… I don’t think this is going to cut it.
PunditMom says
November 9, 2007 at 4:33 pmHey, how many of us are going to be fighting over John Cusack?? And you know Bossy, if it’s true love it’sot stalking!
sue says
November 9, 2007 at 5:08 pmI second Grosse Pointe Blank as best movie. But I also liked America’s Sweethearts.
Pam says
November 9, 2007 at 5:45 pmI guess Bossy does not know that JC (as he likes to be called) is already married to me.
Stalking always appreciated though.
Ruth Dynamite says
November 9, 2007 at 6:42 pmBossy’s funny when her head shows up in random photos.
Cece says
November 9, 2007 at 6:50 pmI want to see that movie!
Mary Alice says
November 9, 2007 at 7:45 pmSometimes I get scared when I see Bossy looking through my window.
Steve says
November 9, 2007 at 8:17 pmVery cute LOL
Oh, The Joys says
November 9, 2007 at 8:24 pmI am having a Vince Vaughn day, myself.
Alli ~Mrs. Fussypants says
November 9, 2007 at 9:00 pmI love the one where you peek thru his office window!
flutter says
November 9, 2007 at 11:23 pmsit at odd angles worrying about him….oh Bossy….
Alex Elliot says
November 10, 2007 at 12:02 amYour posts are just so funny!
whit says
November 10, 2007 at 2:23 amHe’s great. I still quote lines from his movies all the time. It’s a gift.
diesel says
November 10, 2007 at 2:53 amJust seeing ads for that movie is giving me unpleasant flashbacks to K-Pax.
Beta Mom says
November 10, 2007 at 10:52 amOnly for Bossy will I relinquish my hold on JC.
I really have no choice when I look back on his body of work.
Better off Bossy
Bossy Sweethears
Serenbossy
Say Bossy
140bossy
Grosse Pointe Bossy
Bossy John Malkovich
and so, so much more.
Laura says
November 10, 2007 at 11:10 amAnd how could we forget Money for Nothing!
Desiree says
November 10, 2007 at 1:48 pmi love your husband’s boy-ish-ness. but he is getting kinda full of himself…
mcewen says
November 10, 2007 at 5:07 pmSo if it opened today, have you been to watch it? I saw the trailers a few months ago but it looked a bit too mushy for my taste, and I could certainly do without the unnecessary ‘love interest.’
Yours the cynic
Peggy says
November 10, 2007 at 6:10 pmYou can have him bossy…Peggy’s heart beats for J. Depp (and of course her DH..Hi Honey!:p)
Jennifer says
November 10, 2007 at 6:24 pmI watched High Fidelity today and thought of Bossy.
All Adither says
November 10, 2007 at 7:28 pmSo now you’re stalking Dooce AND John C.
I approve.
Robin says
November 10, 2007 at 9:07 pmI love me some John Cusak. Always have. Always will.
kerrianne says
November 11, 2007 at 12:24 amI still think he’s my favorite in “Say Anything.” Although “Runaway Jury” was pretty rad, too.
“Madden Challenge. It was a thing of beauty.”
Get-Off says
November 11, 2007 at 7:18 amHuh?? I thought Neve broke up with him because he was gay. A rose by any other name . . .
Assertagirl says
November 11, 2007 at 8:05 amOhhhh, does Bossy love John Cusack as much as I do? He’s really improving with age, isn’t he? Much better than when he was that geek in Sixteen Candles all those years ago. Serendipity is a movie I have to watch alone now because he’s just too hot in that one.
Queeny says
November 11, 2007 at 11:39 amI haven’t seen the movie (nor do I care to, although I AM a Cusack fan) but it sounds like a more serious take on Adam Sandler’s “Big Daddy.”
Teryn says
November 11, 2007 at 5:04 pmThat’s a real movie? Wow. John Cusack would be the only reason to see that, I think.
Teryn says
November 11, 2007 at 5:12 pmOk, except now I watched the preview, and that part with the kid holding onto his finger? Kinda choked up now.
meleah rebeccah says
November 11, 2007 at 5:56 pmNo one works a PhotoShop like Bossy does.
deb says
November 11, 2007 at 6:41 pmBossy can’t have John Cusack because I want him. He does it for me.
bombaygirl says
November 11, 2007 at 7:55 pmLove it! I love your little bossy photo insertions! Too funny.
Meghan says
November 11, 2007 at 9:04 pmAs if this post wasn’t clever enough (that first photochop had me in stiches), then Beta Mom takes it to the next level.
Serenbossy. I just about peed myself.
Avitable says
November 11, 2007 at 9:56 pmHe’s one of the smartest actors out there. I’ve enjoyed every movie he’s been in.
Devra says
November 11, 2007 at 10:08 pmUp until now the only “menage a trois” I have regularly participated in is me with Ben& Jerry.
I may now have to consider me, you and John Cusack.
I also need to do something about my inability to utilize proper grammar.
Where to start? Conundrum, yes?
sue says
November 11, 2007 at 10:39 pmConundrum? Is that a menage a trois position? I don’t know that one.
Dawn @ Coming to a Nursery Near You says
November 12, 2007 at 6:28 amBossy!!! You did really awesomely great in the weblog awards thingie – I know I know, you didn’t win but damn, woman, you gave them a run for their money – how’d you like to be the one who only got .5%?
As for John, he’s definitely looking better with age and of course, when he answers his truly calling, that of your pool boy, he’ll look even bettah!
Andi says
November 13, 2007 at 10:04 amSo I’m thinking we could just rename your blog The Official John Cusack Stalkers Alliance. Meetings Thursday at 10:30, you can be the first president and photoshop grand wizard since you brought us all together. John (Lloyd Dobler) had me at “Say Anything.”
erin says
November 14, 2007 at 11:36 pmyou’re the coolest stalker i know…keep up the good work!!!
BusyDad says
November 15, 2007 at 3:34 amHi Bossy! Momo Fali sent me over here because you apparently have a thing for this dude named John Cusack? I had the pleasure of getting my butt whupped by him. That little episode is on my latest “7 things” meme. Thought you might enjoy it. It’s the latest meme (XXX Meme) on my blog: http://www.busydadblog.com
Your blog is thoroughly entertaining by the way! See you around! Jim