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Ten-Word Tuesday. The Life Out Of Control Edition.

front-closet

This is Bossy’s front closet, and it is being featured today in order to illustrate Bossy’s out-of-control house, except—a funny thing happens when Bossy tries to document mess: nothing ever looks that bad in the pictures, which doesn’t make this tale classically funny, but more like the kind of funny when only a few moments remain before the mental ward staff shoves gauze in your mouth so you don’t swallow your tongue.

Bossy doesn’t understand why the mound of fallen jackets and gloves and paint-splattered sneakers and tube socks and old roller skates doesn’t look that overwhelming in the picture, just like she doesn’t understand why the tangle of scarves and dog leashes and jump ropes and other scarves and still more scarves doesn’t appear that tangled.

So Bossy tried to take another representational photograph, except this time it was of the top of her bedroom bureau:

mess

But again, it’s hard to sense the total effect of wrinkled nightgowns and empty hair product containers and ill-fitting jewelry and old receipts and rubber bands and lists and notes and lists.

So then Bossy thought maybe she should take a photo of her daughter’s desk, which would surely serve to document the problem:

mess2

But then Bossy decided it would be rude to photograph her daughter’s desk.

The point is: Only a few days remain until Bossy throws a graduation party for her son, and yet her house has become such a disaster it’s hard to know where or how to begin to tidy.

Which leads Bossy to today’s challenge: in exactly ten words, can you share with Bossy a part of your life or house that is completely out of control?

Because Bossy needs some form of entertainment while she waits for the straight jacket. Check back later today for the funniest comments on the web.

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. looming unemployment and my resume is a verbal explosion!

    [ps. Is that the Official Scarf of BOSSY’s Excellent Road Trip in the first photo?]

    Reply

  37. that was supposed to be one “or” the other…I liked the second one best.

    And if that isn’t truly pathetic, I sure don’t know what is!!! =))

    Reply

  46. My closet threw up all over my bed. Why does (the really funny part was coming but Bossy limited me to 10 words!!)?

    Reply

  90. Livingroom overflowing with suitcases from vacation, bedroom, kitchen, and bathroom.

    If I had at least 10 more words I would tell you the tale of my completely out of control life along with my out of control house.

    Reply

  91. Sweetheart – get thee to a Discount Store and invest in bins, tubs and baskets. They are a LIFESAVER at making a mess look like an organizational wet dream.

    Now – you want to talk out of control… let’s discuss the Florida Drought that is killing my yard and bringing me letters from the HOA.

    Reply

  136. Bossy-call in the professionals! They will help you MASSIVELY!!

    (looks like you need it-sheesh, what a fooking mess!)
    Lisa
    coastal nest

    Reply

  142. My bedroom – I’m afraid a published photo of it would get me locked up for crimes against humanity. (sorry, more than 10 words, I know)

    Reply

  172. Voluntary Simplicity? Who am I kidding? No one but me.

    (Is no one, one word or two??)

    Idea for bossy:
    Pack up those clothes and scarves into a box…include contents of bureau (include all beautiful jewelry) and send to: eclecticallyyours.typepad.com.

    Reply

  175. Bird living in attic fell through wallspace into basement today.

    (“scratchy, scratchy, scratch”= sound effects, not to be counted in the ten words, m’kay)

    Reply

  178. I’d say it’s the whole freakin’ place. Big, overgrown mess.

    And I’m having trouble caring about it. (As a total side comment, that doesn’t count in the 10 words)

    Reply

  179. seasonal clothing rotation: bins, bags, drawers, shelves but nothing fits (any of us…)

    Reply

  182. The outside* looks great, but the inside** is a mess.

    *Look around my house, and everything looks immaculate.

    **Open a door or a closet or a cupboard, and you risk your life because something heavy, pointy, sharp WILL fall out on you.

    Kinda sums up me as a person, don’t you think? Nice-looking on the outside, scary as hell on the inside.

    *sigh*

    I’ve gone way over 10 words now. I’ll stop.

    Reply

  196. 2nd bedroom…we call it the office, but it’s really the room that holds all of our crap! very scary in there! teetering piles everywhere!

    k, more than 10 words again 😉

    Reply

  205. sorry, this won’t be 10.

    scrolling backwards I felt so sad and overwhelmed by
    “when he loves you but is no longer in love”
    post.
    that kind of honesty only comes once in a lifetime.
    The rest is just sickening clutter…through your shit away people.

    Reply

  219. Hey weird! My first post got filed under “Ms. Florida Transplant”s name, and my name ended up on some comment about a checkbook being out of control.

    It’s like a Reese’s peanut butter cup commercial around here!

    So yeah, that’s my picture of my garage, just so I can take full responsibility for the shame of it all! =)

    Reply

  225. Just one? Too hard to narrow it down. My front hall closet is about 4 feet deep in stuff. What stuff? I don’t know. My kids bedrooms are horrible. My bedroom is pretty damn bad, too.

    But the rest of the house looks OK.

    Reply

  272. Laundry room overflows with things we will never again wear.

    (I thought about saying “overfloweth” to make it fancy, but it seemed too much for a Wednesday. Also, we’re trying to pare down here.)

    Reply

  285. Oh my god, Bossy, you and I live in the same house. Common areas? Neat and tidy. Just, er, don’t open those closet doors.

    My room? The dresser becomes the landing zone for all the crap I pick up just ahead of a friend visiting our house. Today is the day on my calendar for cleaning my room…and I keep hitting “remind me later”. Annnnnyyyy minute now I’ll clean it up.

    Reply

  288. Maybe Bossy should see if someone will give her a “straighten up” jacket, instead!

    Ten words hmm?

    I have no pictures but my house looks like Bossy’s.

    Reply

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