Tongs. Bossy uses these tongs for everything — she uses them for salad every night, she uses them instead of a spatula to turn things in her iron skillet, she uses them to fish pasta servings out of the pot — let’s just say she uses the be-hell out of them.
This pair is so old Bossy can’t even remember where she got them. Wait – do you say a pair of tongs when there is really only one set of tongs? Wait – do you say set of tongs when it is really only one item with two tongy things?
Other random things about Tongs: Bossy once won a free Tong (pair of tongs, set of tongs) at the Martha Stewart show. She won them just for showing up along with everyone else in the audience, including Bossy’s friends Martha and Amy, and Bossy can’t remember which of those two lost their tongs on the way home from New York City that day, but Bossy quickly offered her Tong, her pair, her set, to the lossee because Bossy thought the Martha Stewart tongs were too fussy and they were missing that little adjustment at the base which allows you to freeze the tongs in the closed position.
Another random tong fact: Bossy’s husband has his own tongs, but they are larger and he uses them to barbeque and Bossy can’t explain why but those tongs depress Bossy. In fact, Bossy doesn’t allow those tongs near the dinner table, because Bossy’s husband always tries to use them as a serving instrument but they are top heavy and keep flipping off of the serving plate and onto the dusty porch floor. Bad tongs.