‘Twas the day before Christmas at the Casa de Blog
All the family was hyper, including the dog.
The stockings were hung on the staircase so steep
Because they don’t have a mantel,
Or a center hall or a mudroom or a pantry,
In their brick Cape so cheap.
While visions of Cabernet danced in her head,
Bossy laid out the snacks for their Christmas Eve spread.
When out on the wetland arose cursing so dire,
On the spot where the husband chopped wood for the fire,
“Why so glum, sugarplum, are the logs all too wet?
From a week filled with rain—and it’s not quite done yet?”
He continued to hack while she returned to her chores,
Such as tossing foul throw quilts behind locked closet doors.
More rapid than eagles Bossy dusted in vain,
And swept hair under chair legs from her enormous Great Dane.
As dry heaves that before food poisoning fly,
Or blog ranking drops like a brick from the sky,
So Bossy did tally things from the year past,
Such wealth and success — Hey kid, not so fast!
While it’s true Bossy’s rich in great family and friends,
Her funds are as leaky as a pair of Depends.
See, there’s not that much income from blogging full time,
Especially when that blog puts her bitching to rhyme.
Still, Bossy is proud of her little Dot Commie
That stormed the blog world like an ether tsunami,
Because through all this writing, Bossy’s met such great peeps,
Gays, moms, Mormons, ranchers—they’re The Harvest she reaps.
So, with a twinkle in her eye, and a twist of this post,
Happy Holidays to all and to those you love most.