When Bossy was growing up, broken things weren’t just broken, they were defective — a term used regularly by Bossy’s dad and formally documented here.
Fast forward to now: the above photo of Bossy’s MacBook Pro indicates a defective return key. One minute everything was fine and the next minute her return key went spongey. Bossy doesn’t like a spongey return key — she enjoys a certain snap to her keys, a pleasing resistance.
And then to make matters worse, Bossy recently noticed that her keyboard light is only illuminating a fraction of the keys. Bossy works in all kinds of lighting conditions, so this defectiveness is a real drag:
And finally, this:
It’s the defective button below the trackpad used for tasks like inserting the cursor, and when Bossy presses it, which she does every few seconds, it reacts like broken glass under her fingers, and it doesn’t really depress like it used to because the button doesn’t stick up enough anymore, and Bossy has seriously never used so many words to explain so little.
In whatever case, Bossy’s MacBook Pro needs a trip to the Mac Store hospital, which is going to set Bossy back time, energy, and money — and she can’t spare any of the above. Bossy can sum up her frustration this way:
Could you just work please, you expensive piece of aluminum?
Which is what today’s Ten-Word Challenge is all about. In exactly ten words, can you tell Bossy about a defective item in your world that is making you lose all will to live?
And don’t forget to check back later today for the most defective comments on the web.
Lauren saysMarch 31, 2009 at 8:35 am
Ceiling light doesn’t latch, flourescent bulb fell out, mercury EVERYWHERE.
Deb saysMarch 31, 2009 at 8:38 am
Flooded basement needs major waterproofing and repair-cost thousands plus!
MidLifeMama saysMarch 31, 2009 at 8:46 am
Third treadmill dead. 20 lbs more to lose before December.
anon for this one saysMarch 31, 2009 at 8:54 am
Third grade teacher is horrible – wish homeschooling was an option.
amy saysMarch 31, 2009 at 8:56 am
My ability to experience joy, felled by cold weather rain.
Gette saysMarch 31, 2009 at 9:00 am
Front door closer sprung, it bangs against the house
vuboq saysMarch 31, 2009 at 9:20 am
I’m reading blogs not cleaning. My motivation is obviously defective.
Lee saysMarch 31, 2009 at 9:20 am
Engine light on, need $300 sensor chip?
BlinkBlink saysMarch 31, 2009 at 9:25 am
Boy was defective – sent him away before I broke, too.
kristin saysMarch 31, 2009 at 9:27 am
Ten words aren’t enough to list the defects at Blackrock.
Lizzy saysMarch 31, 2009 at 9:28 am
Pipe in wall leaking onto floor of daughter’s room. Disaster.
carson saysMarch 31, 2009 at 9:35 am
.22 rifle. Bullets jam. You try screaming at a coyote.
BT saysMarch 31, 2009 at 9:37 am
Roof leaking; ice dams; afraid of big bill; summer please.
Ellie saysMarch 31, 2009 at 9:37 am
CD burner doesn’t work for photos. Which means The Mall.
carma saysMarch 31, 2009 at 9:47 am
My 1986 VCR is on the fritz; time to upgrade?
Debby saysMarch 31, 2009 at 9:48 am
Heel spur irritating plantar fascitis 8 months now, must GO!
Beth saysMarch 31, 2009 at 9:48 am
Kid: stomach flu; partner: sciatica: I’m sending them both back.
Philly saysMarch 31, 2009 at 9:48 am
All I can say is that I need new dry wall.
Maggie Garcia saysMarch 31, 2009 at 9:51 am
Microwave is busted – and you know this nanny don’t cook!!!!
jp saysMarch 31, 2009 at 9:52 am
The incescent, DRIPPING of new watercooler I made Husband buy!
janny226 saysMarch 31, 2009 at 9:56 am
Does my emotional reset button count? How about Husband’s overreactions?
sherry saysMarch 31, 2009 at 9:58 am
Root canal failed, $1,800 re-do needed, cash in IRA again.
Jenni D saysMarch 31, 2009 at 10:00 am
Can’t transfer photos onto new computer. Memory card almost full!!!!!
Grandma J saysMarch 31, 2009 at 10:04 am
SYNC in my car refuses to read my text messages.
Bossy’s keyboard has a backlight? Jealousy so suits Grandma J.
Bellamomma saysMarch 31, 2009 at 10:12 am
Lamp on desk busted, rainy day means dark office BLECK
jennifer saysMarch 31, 2009 at 10:15 am
Three half finished outdoor projects. Rain predicted through Friday. Gack.
Noe saysMarch 31, 2009 at 10:20 am
No N. No Internet. Phone sucks.
chocolatechic saysMarch 31, 2009 at 10:21 am
Refrigerator held together with duct tape, won’t keep things cold.
Amelia saysMarch 31, 2009 at 10:24 am
Car CD player stuck; no “Old MacDonald” for daughter. TRAGEDY!
Colette saysMarch 31, 2009 at 10:34 am
Linksys WiFi sucks- husband thinks he can fix it- HA!
Mo saysMarch 31, 2009 at 10:37 am
Elocrolux vacuum/dustbuster husband bought recalled cuz it splodes…
liza saysMarch 31, 2009 at 10:39 am
Does despise my jobitis count? It’s causing motitvation malfunction. Gah.
Elle M saysMarch 31, 2009 at 10:42 am
Anti-lock brakes sensor gone wonky, had to unplug, no cash.
Eliza saysMarch 31, 2009 at 11:00 am
Defective husband. Two words. I’m just not that into him.
David saysMarch 31, 2009 at 11:09 am
iPod. Periodically freezes. Wait for battery to die, then re-synch.
Little Miss Sunshine State saysMarch 31, 2009 at 11:09 am
Dryer dries clothes. Screeches like a banshee. Landlord is Defective.
Therese saysMarch 31, 2009 at 11:15 am
8 months pregnant, husband out of town, somone vandalized mailbox!
Helen saysMarch 31, 2009 at 11:15 am
Bathroom light only works occasionally. Dodgy wiring. Hurray for candles!
suburbanmom saysMarch 31, 2009 at 11:22 am
Water pipes snaked 3x. Back-up muck. Drain painfully sloooow!
Amy saysMarch 31, 2009 at 11:26 am
Buy AppleCare every time. Because, unfortunately, these Mac things happen.
Brando saysMarch 31, 2009 at 11:28 am
Weather still cold. Global warming becoming more appealing every day.
Shelley saysMarch 31, 2009 at 11:32 am
Teenage daughter has a defective attitude. Can I exchange her?
Jill saysMarch 31, 2009 at 11:33 am
cordless phone needs new battery every month. $12 each. yikes.
Not June Cleaver saysMarch 31, 2009 at 11:40 am
$2000 camera sometimes won’t shoot, works fine at repair shop.
Renee in Seattle saysMarch 31, 2009 at 11:43 am
One more water leak and I will burn down house.
Audubon Ron saysMarch 31, 2009 at 11:49 am
This woman you put here on Earth is DEFECTIVE – Adam
rebekah saysMarch 31, 2009 at 11:53 am
Husband’s coronary arteries “defective” – surgery tomorrow. All good thoughts welcome.
Reeb saysMarch 31, 2009 at 11:56 am
http://www.iambossy.com today, where clicking white space by photo#1 yields https://login.yahoo.com/config/login?.src=flickr&.pc=5134&.scrumb=0&.pd=c%3DE0.GahOp2e4MjkX.5l2HgAoLkpmyPvccpVM-&.intl=us&.done=https%3A%2F%2Flogin.yahoo.com%2Fconfig%2Fvalidate%3F.src%3Dflickr%26.pc%3D5134%26.scrumb%3D0%26.pd%3Dc%253DE0.GahOp2e4MjkX.5l2HgAoLkpmyPvccpVM-%26.intl%3Dus%26.done%3Dhttp%253A%252F%252Fwww.flickr.com%252Fsignin%252Fyahoo%252F%253Fredir%253D%25252Fphotos%25252F8127276%252540N05%25252F3400715237%25252F!
the cheap chick saysMarch 31, 2009 at 12:14 pm
Stupid florescent (sp?) lights in stupid basement went out. Must replace.
hippo brigade saysMarch 31, 2009 at 12:14 pm
My toaster oven: jimmied it with foil and a hanger.
operagal saysMarch 31, 2009 at 12:18 pm
help desk software – have economics webcast tonight no help desk
Lance saysMarch 31, 2009 at 12:19 pm
Windows Vista. EVER. F-you Bill Gates.
well read hostess saysMarch 31, 2009 at 12:23 pm
My metabolism is defective, but I lost the warranty card.
Imran O Kazmi saysMarch 31, 2009 at 12:54 pm
Four Drs, can’t stop ITCHing everywhere, Cetaphil helps a little!
p.j. saysMarch 31, 2009 at 12:59 pm
Mass transit cut 30% yesterday. Highway closed. Traffic balloons. UGLY.
Florida Liz saysMarch 31, 2009 at 1:03 pm
Screen torn, rat came in and died. Imagine my surprise.
p.j. saysMarch 31, 2009 at 1:03 pm
Kitchen faucet hot waterless months. Replacement behind chair two weeks.
Sorry to take two. A wee bit frustrated today. Alas, garden is getting water. p.j.
Kathy in B.C.Canada saysMarch 31, 2009 at 1:08 pm
Dishwasher dying! The Home Depot replacement cost will kill Me!
reen saysMarch 31, 2009 at 1:18 pm
Heel on shoe snapped. Walking defectively, like a drunk.
Donna saysMarch 31, 2009 at 1:20 pm
Landlord ‘fixes’ leaky toilet repeatedly, but AquaPA bill continuously increases.
wynn saysMarch 31, 2009 at 1:28 pm
5th new delete key on Mac in 2 years!
Karly saysMarch 31, 2009 at 1:29 pm
Fan on laptop not working. Spontaneous shutdowns every five minutes.
Jen W. saysMarch 31, 2009 at 1:42 pm
Defective kid: three year old keeps crapping in his pants.
Meg saysMarch 31, 2009 at 1:57 pm
Laptop power adapter, Suburban’s speedometer,
Son’s cell phone. Send money.
ashley saysMarch 31, 2009 at 2:05 pm
Vacuum always smells like burnt hair and won’t suck anymore.
Lisa saysMarch 31, 2009 at 2:08 pm
NOW I know my stuff is old, your keypad lights?
delilah saysMarch 31, 2009 at 2:17 pm
piddled the floor, wet nose, won’t stop yapping. normal toddler.
Unemployed Susan saysMarch 31, 2009 at 2:22 pm
Teenaged boy who looks like me is being purposefully defective.
Manic Mommy saysMarch 31, 2009 at 2:23 pm
Street repaved. Our front walk? Low point. Moats are cool!
SnowWhitemommy saysMarch 31, 2009 at 2:27 pm
My do-it-yourself husband……no longer does it! Please send handyman!
Cactus Petunia saysMarch 31, 2009 at 2:37 pm
Recall button for crazy black labs? Seems to be defective.
Sofia saysMarch 31, 2009 at 2:43 pm
Ankles/feet get hurt, get swollen, can only wear boots.
Scottsdale Girl saysMarch 31, 2009 at 2:48 pm
Defective men. That is all.
SherylW saysMarch 31, 2009 at 2:48 pm
Defective government machine; Spending multi-trillions, deadend solutions, forgotten Constitutional purposes….
rikki saysMarch 31, 2009 at 2:50 pm
ABS light on Jetta. Hoping its just Volkswagon needing crunches….
jen saysMarch 31, 2009 at 3:01 pm
Dog’s “anal glands” not working. I do it myself. AAAUUUUUGGGGGHHHH!!!!!!
MamaMo saysMarch 31, 2009 at 3:05 pm
My brain – not keeping track of stuff like when younger.
margalit saysMarch 31, 2009 at 3:06 pm
Dishwasher not dead but has no hot water attached. Disgusting!
L saysMarch 31, 2009 at 3:24 pm
dishwasher,faucet,broken window,lawnmower,car, it’s always something.
karen saysMarch 31, 2009 at 3:25 pm
Dryer stops when clothes are damp. Deep wrinkles. Must iron!
L saysMarch 31, 2009 at 3:29 pm
forgot about the hot water heater.
Amelia saysMarch 31, 2009 at 3:34 pm
Dear jen (#76): you win.
(Loving these comments!)
Meg saysMarch 31, 2009 at 3:39 pm
Just replaced dead PC. Spending week restoring sanity and system.
Stickman saysMarch 31, 2009 at 3:49 pm
Follicular miniaturization caused by damn genes is making me bald!
Black Hockey Jesus saysMarch 31, 2009 at 4:06 pm
This monitor is blinking. I’m homicidal. I’ll kill you, Bossy!
Caroline saysMarch 31, 2009 at 4:28 pm
My brain! My brain! My brain brain brain brain brain!
big hair envy saysMarch 31, 2009 at 4:32 pm
Dog REEKS. Will not stop rolling in rotting dead stuff.
Kerri Anne saysMarch 31, 2009 at 4:36 pm
Gmail has taken a technology dump on me five times.
Lori saysMarch 31, 2009 at 4:48 pm
If it has tires or testicles, it’s gonna cause trouble.
K saysMarch 31, 2009 at 4:55 pm
Busy soccer mom – brain like a sieve – losing important information.
Reeb saysMarch 31, 2009 at 5:16 pm
Dang, feeling fortunate compared to these.
Jen#76, I’ve been there.
Stacey Ball saysMarch 31, 2009 at 5:33 pm
This year: refrigerator, car, wireless router, receiver. Right now nothing :o)!
Emily in IL saysMarch 31, 2009 at 6:26 pm
Does my team lead count? She fits all the requirements.
Dawn in Austin saysMarch 31, 2009 at 6:35 pm
Happy to say, all works well…today. Knock on wood.
Crystal saysMarch 31, 2009 at 6:45 pm
What electronic piece of crap DOES work in my house?
Chesapeake Bay Woman saysMarch 31, 2009 at 6:49 pm
Everything I have is defective, up to and including me.
Patti in NJ saysMarch 31, 2009 at 7:03 pm
Son can’t figure out how to fix flat tire. WTF?
sista #2 saysMarch 31, 2009 at 7:18 pm
My toshiba laptop, my pinky toe, the goat lady neighbor.
Overflowing Brain saysMarch 31, 2009 at 7:41 pm
My immune system, crushed by a fever, sore throat, headache.
Joie saysMarch 31, 2009 at 7:43 pm
Uh, screw 10 word Tuesday. As a fellow new MacBook owner, when did you get this? You mention aluminum. I bought mine when they first came out with aluminum (or I thought so — last October). If this much has happened to yours since that time, I am scared. And will be pissed since this was something like a $2400+/- machine.
Marjorie of Connecticut saysMarch 31, 2009 at 7:46 pm
Exorbitant fancy shampoo fails to volumize. Flat hair. No life.
Cecily saysMarch 31, 2009 at 7:49 pm
My cell phone is so old texting is impossible.
Frugal Maven saysMarch 31, 2009 at 8:00 pm
Lightning killed icemaker. $350. Dollar Store ice trays. $1.49. Sold!
Sharon saysMarch 31, 2009 at 8:35 pm
My supervisor who took away our right to listen to ipods. It was like a knife to my heart.
Liz in Virginia saysMarch 31, 2009 at 8:47 pm
Oh, please — either the computer or the printer always suck.
Shmoo saysMarch 31, 2009 at 8:58 pm
Our government is sucking the life blood from us all
habanerogal saysMarch 31, 2009 at 9:01 pm
two stove elements, fridge, washer twice in one year GAH
cat saysMarch 31, 2009 at 9:28 pm
#106: Not government, the belief in “spending other people’s money” -capitalism.
We have to stop thinking that rich people fix everything.
Michele saysMarch 31, 2009 at 9:43 pm
Kenmore dishwasher, dryer – consumer report rated highest
Future -no report
CupcakeMurphy saysMarch 31, 2009 at 9:49 pm
Sony Vaio For One Grand: Where Did Hard Drive Go?
TSL saysMarch 31, 2009 at 10:08 pm
Hubby’s job offering buy-outs. He’s considering. Not and live!
sugarpie saysMarch 31, 2009 at 10:39 pm
Bossy- If it flies, floats, or fucks: rent- don’t buy.
Rachel saysMarch 31, 2009 at 10:49 pm
broken window, albatross on computer screen, iceless ice-machine; broken budget.
LizP saysMarch 31, 2009 at 11:46 pm
My brain is defective, my leg is broken, watch FoodTV.
Gigi saysApril 1, 2009 at 12:39 am
Toaster oven knob broken, pops off when toast is done.
Dara saysApril 1, 2009 at 4:55 pm
SUV. Paid off. Now sucking us dry in repair bills.
Melanie @ Mel, A Dramatic Mommy saysApril 1, 2009 at 9:40 pm
No dryer. Lugging laundry sucks. Clothes hanging everywhere. Beverly Hillbillies.
Kate saysApril 2, 2009 at 2:45 am
This one REALLY bothers me. No GPS on my brand
new car – it just doesn’t work and they want 200.00 for a new one – the worst part, the car is a new Jaguar (listed as the most dependable ) sure, sure.
Auds at Barking Mad saysApril 2, 2009 at 7:21 am
Brand new fridge, new ice maker, crushed ice dispenser; doesn’t!
Sven saysApril 3, 2009 at 1:35 am
James’s PC while I wait for my new MacBook Pro.
Almudena saysApril 3, 2009 at 2:08 pm
Baby will not nap without mommy – mommy’s life feels broken.
waterproof saysJuly 9, 2009 at 7:31 am
push the button, hear the crack, OMG! What the ***?!