Spring, spring — what to do about spring? Bossy loves to plant seasonal annual flowers along with the perennial plants she’s been carting around from house to house across state lines for decades, but this year she is pinching pennies, where pinching equals Sister Mercy, Bossy would like to squeeze the life out of you, bastard Penny.
Bossy is planting seeds elsewhere, but for the front of her house she requires the immediacy of blooms, where immediacy equals last thursday wouldn’t be soon enough.
So Bossy and her husband went to the local home center store this past weekend and stood over the array of options representing every color of the beach ball, exactly none of them copacetic with the impossible color of Bossy’s shutters.
In the end they walked away with seven starter petunia plants. Seven. Seven plants to distribute among two lengthy window boxes and two porch containers. And those seven plants look amazing. If your name is Charlie Brown. All that’s missing for the rest of us is approximately one bazillion more plants.