The other day Bossy was watching one of her favorite television shows, Bringing Home Baby, a look at a family’s first 48 hours home with their newborn, which Bossy loves because it makes Bossy feel instantly better about her own life, much like an imagined shot of heroin except more lethal, when all of the sudden this commercial came on:
The voiceover says, “Her brain will triple in size by the time she’s two,”
The voiceover goes on, “Introducing new Nestle Juicy Juice Brain Development with DHA,”
The voiceover continues, “DHA is an essential building block for her brain to develop,”
Then the voiceover is all, “So she can shine a little more every day.”
Although it’s intriguing, this idea you can now pour sippy cups of Brain Development — and about that, gah has juice advanced since Bossy was a young mom and it rotted teeth — but Bossy has another IQ-elevating suggestion for this commercial family: you may want to introduce another word besides nose.
Florida Liz saysMay 18, 2009 at 9:08 am
LOLOL.. exactly !! How about instead of pouring-jamming all these miracle substances into our children, and setting them in front of the latest barrage of ‘teaching’ software and videos we feed them natural real foods and read to them, take them new places and here’s an idea from yesteryear… sit and talk to them.
kristin saysMay 18, 2009 at 9:19 am
The first time I saw this commercial (one of the few commericals I HAVE seen, because I may be–okay, I am– a little addicted to a Discovery Health channel weight-loss show called “X-Weighted”), I was torn between a desire to laugh hysterically or throw something at the t.v. because, really. SO LAME. Juice will not make your kids smart.
I hate marketing.
Jenni saysMay 18, 2009 at 9:37 am
LOL! No amount of “Brain development in a bottle” is going to teach a kid anything. Only your interaction with them will, and apparently that poor little girl is only going to know the word “nose”. I think whats really sad is that the Juicy Juice Company is going to make money off of that ad.
unruly helpmeet saysMay 18, 2009 at 9:42 am
Or, I dunno, eat some FISH. Which actually contains teh amazing DHA, like, naturally. I roll my eyes at this concept. And at that child’s nose, however perky it may be.
MariaV saysMay 18, 2009 at 9:44 am
They must think television viewers are morons.
BH saysMay 18, 2009 at 9:51 am
Juicy Juice with DHA…
Just another gateway to Gin with Olives…
David saysMay 18, 2009 at 11:25 am
BH for the win.
The Domestic Goddess saysMay 18, 2009 at 11:28 am
There’s this great cocktail called Goose and Juice. It’s grey goose and Juicy Juice.
Juicy Juice is the gateway to YEARS OF REHAB.
Lizzy saysMay 18, 2009 at 12:01 pm
Mothers all over the country are going to force their two year old children to drink that crap while they are simultaneously shoving flash cards in front of their kids’ faces right before they take them to baseball practice because they want them to earn a bazillion dollars in the majors while also doing long division and speaking three languages.
Cuz’ that can happen.
Camille saysMay 18, 2009 at 12:29 pm
Good idea BOSSY. Still, I can’t guarantee I won’t be beating down doors at my local grocery store to find the stuff—brain development? Yes, please. I’ll take it in a cup and a syringe.
Ms. Cranky Pants saysMay 18, 2009 at 12:43 pm
Slow down, my head hurts from my Goose and Juice last night…
foolery saysMay 18, 2009 at 12:50 pm
Lord help that child when she gets to school and expects to be tweaked on the nose by everyone and speaks in one-syllable words exclusively.
Like NOSE and JUICE and FOCUS GROUP.
Donna saysMay 18, 2009 at 1:02 pm
Waaay back when my current teenagers were toddlers and occasionally downing apple juice from tupperware sippy cups (because those no-leak sippy cups weren’t invented yet!), I remember Meryl Streep testifying before Congress about the dangers of alar in the apple juice I was feeding my kids. Except that it turned out it wasn’t really that bad after all, and Meryl was mad that she had been misled. But this incident did make me more cognizant of safety issues with food.
I kind of agree with the commenters that think we should just get our nutrients from actual food and not the sprayed-on, injected-in variety.
Reeb saysMay 18, 2009 at 1:06 pm
I enjoy noticing the demographics that ads are geared toward, and the shows they go with.
Evening news = baby boomer old folks meds
Skateboarding competitions = do the dew
Preakness horse race = lots of women’s ads!
No kids here, so no opinion on creepy drinks that increase brain power. Oh maybe there’s an opinion after all…
Reeb saysMay 18, 2009 at 1:07 pm
Foolery, “focus group” includes a 2-syllable word. So the juice kid might or might not grasp it.
jp saysMay 18, 2009 at 1:12 pm
That kid is a bit old for the “Nose, Toes” trick don’tcha think?
Domesic Goddess (in training) saysMay 18, 2009 at 1:57 pm
I second what JP said. All I could think when I saw that commercial is that kid ought to know what a nose is and where to find it by that age!!!!
Julie saysMay 18, 2009 at 4:16 pm
My kids rarely drink juice – I guess they’ll end up dumb as doorknobs. Maybe I can still juice up the 4 year old, it’s a little late in the game for the 10 year old! 😉
Mr Farty saysMay 18, 2009 at 4:39 pm
Surely the advertisers wouldn’t lie to us? Shame on you, Bossy!
Now I want some lovely Juicy Juice. To help my brain develop. Because it’s turned to mush from watching too much tv.
Lee of MWOB saysMay 18, 2009 at 5:04 pm
Oh Bossy – I could care less about that brilliant girl who knows where her nose is and toes are because does Bossy really watch that show “Bringing Home Baby”??? That show reminds me that it’s possible to sell ANYTHING to the networks, cable and otherwise, because that show is about nothing and it’s on the air getting Juicy Juice commercials. Crazy stuff.
Cheri @ Blog This Mom! saysMay 18, 2009 at 5:29 pm
Just stop talking about toes. Please.
Amber Star saysMay 18, 2009 at 6:21 pm
Oh arrghh…that is just so gross!! One doesn’t touch toes and then nose….no no no! And then the dog’s nose and then no doubt her nose or even grosser…pops her finger into her mouth. ugh…and here I was all happy with the Juicy Juice cherry juice that has NO additives or high fructose corn syurp or other bad things. Their cherry juice is much more reasonable at my local grocery store than the stuff at the health food store.
Chesapeake Bay Woman saysMay 18, 2009 at 6:39 pm
I’m pretty much counting on Beringer’s version of Juicy Juice to aid in my brain’s development.
Where “aid” = “jump start” and “brain” = vast wasteland and “development”= At this point it’s way too late to worry.
zelzee saysMay 18, 2009 at 7:02 pm
I think mommy may be a little AAD.
Can’t get her off the nose-toes thing.
Cage Free Family saysMay 18, 2009 at 7:08 pm
Sarah saysMay 18, 2009 at 7:33 pm
Wow….. who’s the genius that does their branding? My 10 year old could come up with something better than that!
I caught the tail end of that commercial the other night and had no idea it was a juice commercial, I never would have guessed that…..
Happily Employed Susan saysMay 18, 2009 at 8:29 pm
I like the commercial promoting high fructose corn syrup. It’s natural!
Catherine McP saysMay 18, 2009 at 9:21 pm
Man oh man, when my girls were little in the mid 80’s, we were only allowed to give them dilutted apple juice! Honest to Abe they turned out just fine and not dumb as a box of bricks. DHA what the hell is that?
Teachermama saysMay 20, 2009 at 1:23 am
Reminds me of that other commercial….you know the one, you don’t actually have to teach your kids to eat nutritious food, you can just give them formula….also with all sorts of miraculous additives for brain development….until they’re 10! LOL
Beth saysMay 20, 2009 at 9:07 pm
I don’t normally brag on my kid (I hope) but at that age she was pointing to the cat’s anus and saying “Yucky butt button.”
All with no juice.
jen saysMay 24, 2009 at 6:45 pm
Yeah, Beth – same here. Only, instead of a cat, it was every big SUV and Hummer my kid saw. And instead of “Yucky butt button,” it was “FUCKIN’ DUCK!”, because that’s what Mommy yelled when the pink Hummer that lived in our neighborhood (and was driven by a 16 year old girl) blew through a stop sign and almost killed us (ok, what I really yelled was, “FUCK A DUCK!!” but you know…the kid was only 3. And no juice. Prolly if he had the DHA Juicy Juice, he woulda got the swear right).