Bossy has all of these photos in her camera taken over the past week while camping, and so she thought it would be a good idea to throw them here and tell a few stories, where good idea equals Bossy can’t for the sleep-deprived life of her figure out a better way to begin this post, and did Bossy mention sleep deprivation?
Shall we begin?
Bossy thought she should explain why she camps a few states away from her own, driving the family through eternity, taking the exit to forever. It’s because Bossy thinks this is the nicest state park she has ever experienced, and Bossy is not just saying that because her friend the Park Ranger told her he would be checking this website to see all of the nice things Bossy was saying about the campground. Everyone shout, “Hi, Park Ranger!”
For one thing, Bossy loves the various options when it comes to campsite terrain. It’s easy to find campgrounds that feature wooded ticky dark scary damp muddy grim sites — but Bossy’s state park also features tons of open rolling happy vista sites, which it may surprise you to learn Bossy prefers.
And the sites are far apart, so there are rarely any disturbances along the lines of wives quitting their marriages at three in the morning while the campground analyzes each one of her many spouted reasons why.
For instance, and who doesn’t like a good for instance, the following photo is an example of the distance between campsites, made more private with the lush, indigenous plants.
In another example, and who doesn’t like a good other example, especially bloggers who take too many photos that will never see the light of day if not used to over-explain, the following photo shows the distance to the neighbor on the other side of Bossy’s campsite:
As further proof, and who doesn’t appreciate good further proof — this is a photo of the other neighbors who are situated at the top of Bossy’s campsite:
These neighbors were by far Bossy’s favorite because, first, the man and the woman sat in their screen house drinking beer and talking. Until 3 a.m. At which time the wife decided to break up the marriage. It was so exciting! For the first two hours!
And then at 5 a.m. the husband tried to reel his wife back in, and the couple eventually retired to their sleeping quarters to do everything but sleep, if you catch Bossy’s drift. The same very loud drift that drifted over the otherwise silent campground for the next hour plus, resulting in many annoyed campers and an increase in Viagra sales the next day at the local pharmacy.
Unfortunately, Bossy never got a look at the couple, and too bad Bossy wasn’t sitting near the camp office the next day when the couple drove up to ask the ranger a few questions using those same voices because then Bossy could have captured a photo of them for her council. Oh wait, Bossy was sitting there and did snap a picture:
Caroline saysAugust 6, 2009 at 1:10 pm
GAWWWWD, I hate when that happens–when you need a vacation to recover from a vacation. And my neighbors’ marital blissfests and marital breakups are No. 1 and No. 2 on the list of things I never, ever want to listen to. Poor Bossy! Poor Bossy’s Family! Poor lobsters!
Lizzy saysAugust 6, 2009 at 1:23 pm
My sleeping habits are a lot like Bossy’s, minus the weird loud couple with the fuzzy plates on their faces.
How long does it take to make coffee over a fire???
Meg at the Members Lounge saysAugust 6, 2009 at 1:25 pm
Another episode of CSI BOSSY. Please post some more camping crime scenes!
Ms. Cranky Pants saysAugust 6, 2009 at 1:35 pm
As the Campground Turns!
Cactus Petunia saysAugust 6, 2009 at 1:46 pm
I just love summer soap operas!
Momo Fali saysAugust 6, 2009 at 2:30 pm
It looks like there are people in that red tent and I think Bossy’s time would have been better served throwing rocks at it instead of snapping pictures.
Liza saysAugust 6, 2009 at 2:48 pm
It’s a regular telenovella – can I come camping with you?
Stacey Ball saysAugust 6, 2009 at 2:48 pm
Ewwww. I had a similar experience only mine consisted of a left on flashlight in the evening which gave quite the silhouette of the scene of the crime. Think that one scene in Austin Powers only with two people. Ewww.
ZDub saysAugust 6, 2009 at 2:59 pm
Damn. When I go camping, my neighbors just snore.
Mr Farty saysAugust 6, 2009 at 3:07 pm
Bossy has the funnest camping holidays.
Shut up, spellcheck, funnest is so a word.
krg saysAugust 6, 2009 at 3:26 pm
that just m.ay be a reason to camp
Laura saysAugust 6, 2009 at 3:33 pm
I haven’t laughed as hard as I’m laughing right now in a LONG time. This is absolutely priceless!
Eloise saysAugust 6, 2009 at 3:38 pm
You crack me up!
I’m enjoying your camping tales.
Manic Mommy saysAugust 6, 2009 at 3:51 pm
Ah, drunken make-up sex. Just what Bossy was hoping to overhear with her daughter.
Hey, wait! I do have a brother-in-law, Mike. And that’s NOT my sister.
ScottsdaleGirl saysAugust 6, 2009 at 4:09 pm
All these SCREENED in camping devices. This makes me sure there are entirely too many bugs for me to enjoy this. Lobster all and.
Reeb saysAugust 6, 2009 at 4:15 pm
Looks like my comments on the poverty post belong here instead. But this post wasn’t up at that point.
The Bossy family has the mansion of the Park, looks like. It would SEEM that the generous spacing provided would be sufficient to provide privacy… but nooooo.
And: “Hi, Park Ranger!”
safetydog saysAugust 6, 2009 at 4:16 pm
Sounds like one of our camping experiences, except that the campsites were so close that the neighbors’ awning was inches away from the side of our trailer. And on the other side, technically not in the campground, was a large house hosting a group of loud, drunk college boys who held belching contests on the deck all night long. Our 4-year old daughter got quite the education that night.
Noe saysAugust 6, 2009 at 4:20 pm
joeinvegas saysAugust 6, 2009 at 4:58 pm
It looks like everyone there (including Bossy’s daughter) need a bit more sunshine and suntans.
Half Assed Kitchen saysAugust 6, 2009 at 5:31 pm
At least they make an amusing blog post.
Margie saysAugust 6, 2009 at 6:26 pm
My longest night probably wasn’t that bad. The grandkid with ADD finally went to sleep. The grandkid that threatened vomiting because she missed her mom finally went to sleep. That left me awake listening to the canp host’s dogs bark after camp host got sick and was trundled away to get care. The dogs were little yappy things and one of them had the surgery that was supposed to cure yapping. It hadn’t quite worked and it sounded like a sick crow. No sex and violence or any of those fun things you tuned into.
cat saysAugust 6, 2009 at 6:28 pm
Wasn’t Bossy too, too kind putting flesh colored ovals on their faces…shoulda been black bars like in those tabloid pics?
Birdbrain saysAugust 6, 2009 at 6:32 pm
What’s this – camping on green grass with lush vegetation around? Nearby towns with Thai restaurants to have lunch at? As a kid we camped at National Forest dirt campsites deep in the mountains, miles from civilization, pit toilets and no running water other than the middle fork of the Willamette River. No wonder I hate camping, we were on the wrong coast!
Chesapeake Bay Woman saysAugust 6, 2009 at 6:59 pm
I see Bossy goes camping with the same people I do. They all hail from the same town: Dysfunction Junction.
Audubon Ron saysAugust 6, 2009 at 7:18 pm
I love that story. Please read it to me again.
sugarpie saysAugust 6, 2009 at 7:33 pm
If you slip a little lobster to the Park Ranger he might be able to make the neigboring camp situation sort of “go away.” Dont skimp on the butter.
ps Hi, Park Ranger!
Tonya_in _FL saysAugust 6, 2009 at 8:23 pm
LOL. I love the “camp opera”!
Mo saysAugust 6, 2009 at 8:38 pm
Are you campsite trespassing to take pictures of the scene of the crime? Bossy! tsk
dgm saysAugust 6, 2009 at 8:52 pm
Usually when I can’t sleep at my campsite it’s because I think I have to be alert to protect the rest of the family from the bears and serial killers I hear walking around. I much prefer that to loud couples and/or crying babies.
denise saysAugust 6, 2009 at 9:07 pm
Thank you Bossy. I have been waiting on tenterhooks for the blow by blow by blow by blow by blow report. Please tell me the man had a mullet. That would then make this the perfect camping story!
MommyTime saysAugust 6, 2009 at 9:11 pm
I loved camping as a kid, for all the reasons that your first few photos suggest. It was the can’t-get-away-from-the-neighbors story that gave me hives and flashbacks, though, to the snoring — oh, the snoring! — of members of my own family.
Jenn @ Juggling Life saysAugust 6, 2009 at 9:25 pm
I’d say your fighting/making up couple definitely trumps my Chinese church group singing hymns until 5 a.m. Mine was easier to explain to the kids.
Niki saysAugust 6, 2009 at 9:59 pm
As someone who has married 2 Vermonters (well duh- not at the same time!!) I can tell you that you are lucky that this is ALL you saw and heard. Vermonters are a different breed indeed.
Melodie saysAugust 6, 2009 at 11:03 pm
You never know about the “wildlife” these days……
Sissy in Texas saysAugust 6, 2009 at 11:23 pm
See, this is why the Hilton is your friend.
kimi saysAugust 7, 2009 at 1:03 am
when i am sad i will come back to this post for a good cry (from bumping into furniture while rolling on the floor laughing)
Hippo Brigade saysAugust 7, 2009 at 2:40 am
I’m pretty sure that was me. Sorry I kept you up all night. P.S. I borrowed one of your towels.
janny226 saysAugust 7, 2009 at 9:41 am
I love it!! Glad it wasn’t me, but it sure made for a good story! Thanks, Bossy!
The Domstic Goddess saysAugust 7, 2009 at 9:42 am
3am, huh? It couldn’t wait until 4?
Deb saysAugust 7, 2009 at 9:48 am
I wish we could see their faces, but I can imagine their afterglow. Ah, nature!
Madness saysAugust 7, 2009 at 10:38 am
THAT might just be the BEST camping story EVER.
mirela saysAugust 7, 2009 at 10:43 am
Super story, thanks!!!
Mack saysAugust 7, 2009 at 12:17 pm
Like the SPY pics!!
E saysAugust 7, 2009 at 12:31 pm
Sounds like my last camping experience … only instead of a marriage break/make-up a man was camping with his 2 kids and ended up dying in the lake at 3 am. So tragic, and strange … and also SO close to where I was slumbering. I like your story better … nobody died.
GrandeMocha saysAugust 7, 2009 at 12:45 pm
“Hi, Mr. Park Ranger!” “Hi Yogi & BooBoo!” My that’s a big picnic basket you have.
Bri saysAugust 7, 2009 at 1:59 pm
Ah! Lurve all the camping posts of late! Too funny Bossy, too too funny. Gee!
foolery saysAugust 7, 2009 at 3:24 pm
The worst part is when you and your own campers start taking sides in CoupleZilla’s fight:
“I dunno — I think Imogene had a point. He DOES make too big a deal out of her webbed toes!”
“But Esterhazy loves her! And other than those two affairs — *which meant NOTHING* — he’s been a stand-up guy!”
jane saysAugust 8, 2009 at 1:57 am
Same thing happened to me in a motel. The couple next door sobbing and moaning their way through the night. The difference is, in a motel, you can turn the ‘do not disturb’ sign over to the ‘service my room immediately’ side ensuring the maid will wake them up before noon. Sweet revenge!
Park Ranger saysAugust 8, 2009 at 7:17 pm
Bossy, please tell the rest of the story. (2:00 am departure the next night) I am sure that it will make a perfect finish to this “as the stomach turns” story.
Oh, and those ruts……… it was merely the grass bent over.
Oh, oh, your husband spotted the tree chickens. Did he tell you?
Oh, oh, oh, Hi everyone back.
Jean saysAugust 9, 2009 at 10:57 pm
Did anyone else wonder who actually still uses tents like the one the fighting couple was “camping” in?? Even with my limited cub scout camping experience, that tent seems a bit “vintage”. But that could just be me.
Linda Sherwood saysAugust 9, 2009 at 11:45 pm
Hey Bossy, the Park Ranger is Funny! No wonder you travel across states to go there. 😉