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Ten-Word Tuesday. The Sing Along.

bossy-dances-karaoke

This is a photo of Bossy dancing in a bar in the Berkshires this past May while on her (No) Book Tour. Actually, this is not a photo of Bossy dancing in a bar in the Berkshires this past May — this is a photo of Bossy panicking.

Why would Bossy be panicking? Because this particular bar in the Berkshires featured karaoke.

Don’t get Bossy wrong, it’s not that she’s too shy to sing in public, where public equals in front of her daughter in the car. It’s just that when faced with the idea of karaoke, Bossy can never remember which songs she’s able to sing without random dogs throwing themselves into traffic.

If you’ve never been to a karaoke bar, then you probably don’t know that the list of available karaoke songs is contained within a book the approximate height of Burj Khalifa.

karaoke-list

Bossy’s reaction to this paradigm of too much choice is always the same: she begins by flipping through the song list alphabetically until she is a very old woman, the end.

Next Bossy flips through the book by artist: The Beatles, no. The Commodores, no. Oh look, the bar is closing!

And there’s one more troubling factor wrapped around this idea of karaoke: Bossy thinks she can remember songs, until she is halfway through and is all, Oh right, I forgot about this altogether awkward bridge — the very same bridge Bossy would like to jump from rather than sing the tune in front of strangers.

Bossy can sum up her attitude about karaoke in this way: What’s so wrong with hiding in the bathroom stall anyway?

Which is what today’s Ten-Word Challenge is all about. In exactly ten words, can you tell Bossy if you have a preordained tune you sing at karaoke, and if so which one/s so Bossy can get her song on?

And be sure to check back later today for the best karaoke suggestions on the web.

Reader Interactions

Comments

  3. Rawhide – classic, cowboy. Plus you get to slap your butt.
    Respect – everybody wants to be Aretha.
    Mack The Knife – because Bobby was just it.

    (I feel very old right now.)

    Reply

  4. –>It’s been about 10 years but I always go with Shania Twain’s “Any Man of Mine.”
    It’s really hard to screw it up. That, or I had enough *liquid courage* to think I sang it well.

    Before marrying me, my husband got kicked out of a bar in Canada for changing “My Sharona” to “My Scrotum” while he swung the microphone around.
    I. Know.

    Reply

  17. I kick butt on Son of a Preacher Man, Time after Time and Sweet Home Alabama. But only on playstation RockStar. You should get one and have karaoke night at your house.

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  21. Absolutely nothing wrong with hiding in a bathroom stall (I hope the stalls in the womens rooms are nicer than those in the mens room).

    I’m petrified of karaoke, and I play guitar and sing. I’d much rather sing w/ my guitar than in front of a bar w/ words displayed on a screen. I’ve never been drunk enough to actually do it. My wife has, and has enjoyed it. She says.

    On one of our first dates I met her at a bar, and walked in to someone “singing.” I didn’t recognize the song or the voice. It was her. Singing Me and Bobby McGee. I haven’t let her forget this.

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  22. Can’t do it in 10 words.
    Karaoked once. Was fantastic—– and drunk.
    Next day at work lots of smiles and shaking of heads

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  23. I’ve never even done karaoke but I am pretty certain I would suffer from the same malady as Bossy. For those of us who would end up standing there like a deer caught in headlights, a preordained, tried-n-true would be the way to go.

    Reply

  25. My most successful attempt at karaoke was “Like a Virgin”. I had a LOT to drink & so did my friends. They asked for a repeat for years.

    Reply

  26. Another time, I didn’t realize that the reason I couldn’t understand the girl ahead of me was the words were in kanji, not English. Some liquid courage was involved.

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  36. Anything by the Ramones – I Wanna Be Sedated, Rockaway Beach, Sheena is a Punk Rocker, Blitzkrieg Bop

    OR anything by Reel Big Fish – She Has a Girlfriend Now, Your Guts (I Hate ’em), Beer Added bonus of lots of air guitar

    Reply

  50. This is timely. Still karaoke virgin but partay this weekend!

    And I may remain karaoke virgin after the weekend too.

    Reply

  51. [Why do we worry about our kids’ songs, and what they’re singing? Look at these skanky lyrics from our youth-hoods!]

    Reply

  53. It’s best when you’re in Japan and you find a place that has private karaoke rooms for 6-8 people so you don’t have to sing in front of the whole bar. I’ve heard New York has places like this, too. We should go!

    Reply

  54. Am amazed at all the singers in Bossy’s posse. Trying to picture them all together at a karaoke bar somewhere.
    Fighting over who goes next. Duets, trios, choruses.

    Reply

  57. Did you see the movie My Best Friends Wedding? The part when Cameron Diaz was singing. Compared to me, she can sing. That is why I don’t sing.

    Reply

  64. My favorite DJ keeps track of all of her regular singers and their selections in a special notebook so we never have to flip through the book unless we want to try something different. My usual choices are Jesse James (Cher), Alone (Heart), Jolene (Dolly Parton), or My Immortal (Evanescence).

    Reply

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