This is a photo of Bossy dancing in a bar in the Berkshires this past May while on her (No) Book Tour. Actually, this is not a photo of Bossy dancing in a bar in the Berkshires this past May — this is a photo of Bossy panicking.
Why would Bossy be panicking? Because this particular bar in the Berkshires featured karaoke.
Don’t get Bossy wrong, it’s not that she’s too shy to sing in public, where public equals in front of her daughter in the car. It’s just that when faced with the idea of karaoke, Bossy can never remember which songs she’s able to sing without random dogs throwing themselves into traffic.
If you’ve never been to a karaoke bar, then you probably don’t know that the list of available karaoke songs is contained within a book the approximate height of Burj Khalifa.
Bossy’s reaction to this paradigm of too much choice is always the same: she begins by flipping through the song list alphabetically until she is a very old woman, the end.
Next Bossy flips through the book by artist: The Beatles, no. The Commodores, no. Oh look, the bar is closing!
And there’s one more troubling factor wrapped around this idea of karaoke: Bossy thinks she can remember songs, until she is halfway through and is all, Oh right, I forgot about this altogether awkward bridge — the very same bridge Bossy would like to jump from rather than sing the tune in front of strangers.
Bossy can sum up her attitude about karaoke in this way: What’s so wrong with hiding in the bathroom stall anyway?
Which is what today’s Ten-Word Challenge is all about. In exactly ten words, can you tell Bossy if you have a preordained tune you sing at karaoke, and if so which one/s so Bossy can get her song on?
And be sure to check back later today for the best karaoke suggestions on the web.
The Domestic Goddess says
August 10, 2010 at 8:43 amAlways do Summer Nights from Grease, especially with a partner.
BOSSY says
August 10, 2010 at 8:43 amBossy thinks maybe she can sing guy vocalist songs better.
Wimsey says
August 10, 2010 at 8:44 amRawhide – classic, cowboy. Plus you get to slap your butt.
Respect – everybody wants to be Aretha.
Mack The Knife – because Bobby was just it.
(I feel very old right now.)
WebSavvyMom says
August 10, 2010 at 8:44 am–>It’s been about 10 years but I always go with Shania Twain’s “Any Man of Mine.”
It’s really hard to screw it up. That, or I had enough *liquid courage* to think I sang it well.
Before marrying me, my husband got kicked out of a bar in Canada for changing “My Sharona” to “My Scrotum” while he swung the microphone around.
I. Know.
Maria says
August 10, 2010 at 8:45 amI always sing Freedom 90. I get to say “ass.”
Bush Babe (of Granite Glen) says
August 10, 2010 at 8:49 amWalking on Sunshine (Katrina and the Waves)… so catchy everyone else sings along too and drowns out (my) very bad singing.
🙂
BB
PS If you’re an Aussie, it’s gotta be Khe Sahn by Cold Chisel but I don’t know if it’s well known in the USA. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Khe_Sanh_(song))
vuboq says
August 10, 2010 at 8:53 amLove Shack! Baby! Tin Roof! Rusted! Chryslers! Whales! Fantastic! B-52s!
MD says
August 10, 2010 at 8:55 amPreordained is for rookies. Flip randomly and go for it.
mom2werogers says
August 10, 2010 at 8:59 amBaby Got Back – Sir Mix-a-lot. Distract with booty.
Ambry says
August 10, 2010 at 9:18 amSweet Caroline. Everyone sings along! You’ll never be alone. :]
Totalspacecadet says
August 10, 2010 at 9:22 amSweet Caroline! DUN DUN DUN! Good times never seem so good!
Shelley says
August 10, 2010 at 9:22 amHusband and I always did “Paradise By The Dashboard Light.”
Shelley says
August 10, 2010 at 9:23 am“Joy to the World”, Three Dog Night. Everyone sings along.
Shelley says
August 10, 2010 at 9:24 amFavorite solo, “I Only Wanna Be With You.” – Samantha Fox.
Heather says
August 10, 2010 at 9:37 amAir Supply, preferably Making Love Out Of Nothing At All.
Catazon says
August 10, 2010 at 9:56 amSave faves list in phone; forget about list and FAIL.
(This doesn’t really answer the question, but it’s my karaoke method.)
DawnA says
August 10, 2010 at 9:57 amI kick butt on Son of a Preacher Man, Time after Time and Sweet Home Alabama. But only on playstation RockStar. You should get one and have karaoke night at your house.
the 7msn ranch says
August 10, 2010 at 10:00 amHave not, cannot, will not sing in public. Ever.
heidig says
August 10, 2010 at 10:03 am#18 – ditto!
Dree says
August 10, 2010 at 10:07 amDaydream Believer by the Monkeys is melodious when sung drunk!
pvz says
August 10, 2010 at 10:07 amAbsolutely nothing wrong with hiding in a bathroom stall (I hope the stalls in the womens rooms are nicer than those in the mens room).
I’m petrified of karaoke, and I play guitar and sing. I’d much rather sing w/ my guitar than in front of a bar w/ words displayed on a screen. I’ve never been drunk enough to actually do it. My wife has, and has enjoyed it. She says.
On one of our first dates I met her at a bar, and walked in to someone “singing.” I didn’t recognize the song or the voice. It was her. Singing Me and Bobby McGee. I haven’t let her forget this.
Gramps says
August 10, 2010 at 10:09 amCan’t do it in 10 words.
Karaoked once. Was fantastic—– and drunk.
Next day at work lots of smiles and shaking of heads
Liz Tee says
August 10, 2010 at 10:10 amI’ve never even done karaoke but I am pretty certain I would suffer from the same malady as Bossy. For those of us who would end up standing there like a deer caught in headlights, a preordained, tried-n-true would be the way to go.
CS says
August 10, 2010 at 10:26 amalways bobby mcgee, because drunk can pull off gravelly/low.
GrandeMocha says
August 10, 2010 at 10:32 amMy most successful attempt at karaoke was “Like a Virgin”. I had a LOT to drink & so did my friends. They asked for a repeat for years.
GrandeMocha says
August 10, 2010 at 10:36 amAnother time, I didn’t realize that the reason I couldn’t understand the girl ahead of me was the words were in kanji, not English. Some liquid courage was involved.
GrandeMocha says
August 10, 2010 at 10:43 amI sang “Wild Thing” (Troggs vers) and the DJ turned my mic off. I kept going!
Mary K says
August 10, 2010 at 10:46 amOne (is the Loneliest Number) — Three Dog Night. Awwwww song.
rockle says
August 10, 2010 at 11:15 am“Crazy Train” by Ozzy Osbourne. Works for me, every time.
squaregirl says
August 10, 2010 at 11:23 amDead Kennedys. Too Drunk To F**k. Need I say more?
Scottsdale Girl says
August 10, 2010 at 11:30 amAngel from Montgomery or It’s So Easy (linda Rondstatd)
Scottsdale Girl says
August 10, 2010 at 11:33 amRonstat? Rondstat? hmmmmm
Tara Anderson says
August 10, 2010 at 11:35 am“Wild wild life” by Talking Heads.
Because it’s true.
Yellaphant says
August 10, 2010 at 11:57 amLove is a Battle Field. ALWAYS.
Christine says
August 10, 2010 at 12:08 pmNo bars anymore- now just lots of Disney songs.
Dharmamama says
August 10, 2010 at 12:12 pmAnything by the Ramones – I Wanna Be Sedated, Rockaway Beach, Sheena is a Punk Rocker, Blitzkrieg Bop
OR anything by Reel Big Fish – She Has a Girlfriend Now, Your Guts (I Hate ’em), Beer Added bonus of lots of air guitar
Meg at the Members Lounge says
August 10, 2010 at 12:16 pmExact same range as Nancy Sinatra. Are you ready boots? .
KathyB says
August 10, 2010 at 12:21 pmJust say No Thank You to karaoke microphone, bossy Bossy.
dgm says
August 10, 2010 at 12:34 pm“Gypsies, Tramps & Thieves” and “Sweet Caroline” exhaust my potential.
Dawn in Austin says
August 10, 2010 at 1:11 pmOne time drunk, er, brave enough to sing karaoke- “Tequila!”
Bellacantare says
August 10, 2010 at 1:20 pm“Hit Me With Your Best Shot” is my go to.
Amy in NJ says
August 10, 2010 at 1:29 pmchain chain chain chain chain chain chain “Chain of Fools.”
ags345 says
August 10, 2010 at 1:35 pmLike a Bat Outta Hell I’ll Be Gone Gone Gone.
Hippo Brigade says
August 10, 2010 at 1:45 pmIf you don’t dance, then you’re no friend of mine.
kerry says
August 10, 2010 at 2:20 pm“Margaritaville”…because deep down inside everyone wants to be Jimmy Buffett.
BossysMom says
August 10, 2010 at 2:28 pmif you string all these words together one hellova song.
Manic Mommy says
August 10, 2010 at 3:29 pmOnly drunk enough once – Summer Lovin’ with most of office.
Alison says
August 10, 2010 at 3:53 pmNever have Karoaked. Never will. Never, never, never, never, never.
Amy says
August 10, 2010 at 4:20 pmMy husband and I have a no-karaoke pact, so nothing.
Reeb says
August 10, 2010 at 4:46 pmThis is timely. Still karaoke virgin but partay this weekend!
And I may remain karaoke virgin after the weekend too.
Reeb says
August 10, 2010 at 4:47 pm[Why do we worry about our kids’ songs, and what they’re singing? Look at these skanky lyrics from our youth-hoods!]
Muskrat says
August 10, 2010 at 5:09 pmBossy mouths the words to Milli Vanilli; Muskrat provides vocals.
Lauren says
August 10, 2010 at 5:09 pmIt’s best when you’re in Japan and you find a place that has private karaoke rooms for 6-8 people so you don’t have to sing in front of the whole bar. I’ve heard New York has places like this, too. We should go!
Suzi says
August 10, 2010 at 5:12 pmAm amazed at all the singers in Bossy’s posse. Trying to picture them all together at a karaoke bar somewhere.
Fighting over who goes next. Duets, trios, choruses.
rebekah says
August 10, 2010 at 5:19 pmSing “Old Black Water”: everybody will always – ALWAYS – join in.
Danielle says
August 10, 2010 at 6:03 pmWho doesn’t love Smells Like Teen Spirit. Reverb mike helps.
L says
August 10, 2010 at 6:38 pmDid you see the movie My Best Friends Wedding? The part when Cameron Diaz was singing. Compared to me, she can sing. That is why I don’t sing.
Chesapeake Bay Woman says
August 10, 2010 at 7:06 pmIf you can keep from laughing, Rappers Delight is perfect.
Chesapeake Bay Woman says
August 10, 2010 at 7:09 pmHotel, motel, Holiday Inn…words are tricky; notes are doable.
Chesapeake Bay Woman says
August 10, 2010 at 7:13 pmWords are also hilarious…”and the chicken tastes like wood.”
Mary from California says
August 10, 2010 at 7:17 pm…big Cadillac, gangsta white walls, TV antenna in the back
Jean says
August 10, 2010 at 7:26 pmI won’t do karaoke again. I Will Survive killed me.
ruth says
August 10, 2010 at 7:32 pmOMGosh so many replies! Chain Chain Chain and anything ARETHA! If it’s good enuff for Murphy Brown Etc.
ruth
Amber says
August 10, 2010 at 7:57 pmMy favorite DJ keeps track of all of her regular singers and their selections in a special notebook so we never have to flip through the book unless we want to try something different. My usual choices are Jesse James (Cher), Alone (Heart), Jolene (Dolly Parton), or My Immortal (Evanescence).
leslie says
August 10, 2010 at 8:48 pmYou could not pay me enough to sing anything karaoke.
Kelly says
August 10, 2010 at 9:06 pmSummer Nights from Grease with some random poor drunk girl
Lori in MN says
August 10, 2010 at 9:21 pm“What’s going on” by Four Non Blondes…singing then screaming!
Cupcake Murphy says
August 10, 2010 at 9:44 pmI only know my NON preordained tune: Go Ask Alice
km says
August 10, 2010 at 9:56 pmwon case of beer long ago for “sweet child o’mine”.
Chrissy says
August 11, 2010 at 12:44 amAnything from “Nightman Cometh” episode of It’s Always Sunny In…
Em says
August 11, 2010 at 12:53 amI fall to pieces or I go walking after midnight
Bonnie says
August 11, 2010 at 1:53 amD-I-V-O-R-C-E especially when drunk.
Tracy says
August 11, 2010 at 7:01 amIf I had a million dollars. By the Barenaked Ladies
Jami says
August 11, 2010 at 10:54 amInjunctions by my family prevent me from singing in public.
mel says
August 11, 2010 at 11:06 amLiving on a Prayer. The crown always joins in.
Jenn @ Juggling LIfe says
August 11, 2010 at 2:31 pmThere is not enough alcohol in the world (for me or the audience) for me to sing karaoke. I know I’m over 10 words, but sometime the truth just needs more words.
Steve says
August 12, 2010 at 4:21 pmJust bought my first Karaoke machine….gotta go practice…now
(10 words exactly- minus parenthesis, of course)
Steve says
August 12, 2010 at 4:39 pmI think I mastered Eve of Destruction. Perfect for Karaoke!
Doug says
August 12, 2010 at 5:12 pmI would get arrested if I EVER sang in public.
Doug says
August 12, 2010 at 5:13 pmBut when alone in my truck: “Won’t Get Fooled Again.”
Jen says
August 18, 2010 at 11:46 amHarper Valley PTA standard, but did One Week once – fun!