April 17, 2009

And Now For An Episode Of The Barefoot Contessa.


So we all know Bossy is a little more than obsessed with chef Ina Garten and her cooking show, The Barefoot Contessa, on the Food Network, right?

Usually Ina is all Jeffrey Jeffrey Jeffrey — where Jeffrey equals Ina’s husband, who can somehow manage to preside over a little thing called Yale’s School of Business, but when sent to the market for goat cheese he returns with overripe melons.

When Ina isn’t tending her husband Jeffrey, who has an understandable need to shuttle away from Ina for long periods of every week, Ina is all about her gays.


This is T.R., better known as model/actor T.R. Pescod, where model/actor equals Model with a heaping side of Model, hold the Actor.


In this episode of The Barefoot Contessa, Ina is preparing food which T.R. can serve at a dinner party upon his return to the Hamptons from his other home in New York City. In exchange, T.R. has promised to bring Ina something delicious from the city.

First Ina prepares Nevermind because Bossy forgot to tape the beginning of the episode so she missed this part. Next Ina prepares Chicken Pot Pie, which features chicken, a pot, and some pie:


While Ina toils over her stainless steel industrial stove, swoon, T.R. goes to a specialty market in New York City:


So what does T.R. buy? Oh yes, he goes right for the salami:



When he’s all finished with the whole salami selection process, T.R. looks at the camera and sticks out his tongue and slurps a little:


Meanwhile back at the ranch, where ranch equals A sun-kissed East Hamptons’ cedar shake colonial, Ina rolls her pliable dough over the cream with cream and some chicken cream:


And then it was time for a commercial featuring the open-heart surgery you’ll need after consuming the amount of butter found in all of Ina’s recipes.


When the commercial break is over, we find T.R., still in the specialty food store in New York City, lingering over his next purchase:


Meanwhile Ina prepares T.R’s split pea soup, sweating onions for flavor and adding salt for flavor and cracked pepper for flavor and one time Bossy and her husband invented a fun drinking game, which is to chug every time Ina uses the word flavor. Bossy kids, she wouldn’t invent a drinking game with her husband! Bossy invented it with her son.


And before you know it, there’s T.R. bounding up Ina’s porch steps and ringing her doorbell.



And so Ina stands there and shows him all of the delicious food she has prepared for his dinner party and then she asks if T.R. wants to come in for a glass of wine, and T.R. is all, “I’d love to but I have my important guests not you coming,” and then he shows Ina what he brought her from the city in exchange for Ina’s day slaving over a stove.

Three heirloom tomatoes.

T-R-Ina Garten-friend-tongue2

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