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i am bossy

Where Bossy Celebrates Her First Birthday.

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In honor of Bossy’s very first post one year ago, she offers the following Advice of the Day: How Not To Start A Blog:

While taking your morning shower, do not begin to think about your pricey new Microfiber sectional and about the fact that your Great Dane’s slobber appears to be bleaching the color out of it or maybe the discoloration can be cleaned away?

And do not allow your thoughts to drift to your friend Bobo who owns an Upholstery Cleaning business where he likes to tell his Maryland people that he’s in Jersey and his Jersey people that he’s in Delaware and his Delaware people that he’s in Maryland when all the while Bobo is actually home in his massage chair watching Kelly Ripa.

And don’t stand in that shower and decide that what Bobo really needs to do is start an Upholstery Cleaning blog because he knows everything there is to know about poly fiber seat cushions encased in synthetic ticking even though neither of you know what a blog really is.

And don’t allow your thoughts to wander to a time two years prior when your friend Ronny’s wife JoAnn stood in the kitchen of your brother’s house and declared that you yourself should have a blog because you remind her of
Anne Lamott minus the religion and the book contract. And don’t stand in that shower all soapy with low blood sugar and decide maybe your friend Ronny’s wife JoAnn was right and what you should do is track sopping footprints from the shower to your computer chair to purchase a blog because in blog world you can tell people what to do and if absolutely nothing else you are Bossy. Because really? That’s just stupid.

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Comments

  1. Oh no, I hope my Delaware, Maryland and Jersey employees dont read this blog, or the jig is up. Gotta go, Regis and Kelly is on

  2. Congrats! You and I started not so far apart, I only just celebrated my 1 year the beginning of March. Keep up the great work! I love reading your humor!

  3. Congratulations! I love Ripa too, but not nearly as much as my Bossy. You are the first thing I read when I plop my butt down each morning in front of the computer…even before I check weather.com, if you can believe that! Happy Birthday!

  5. Wow! Bossy’s bigger than weather.com! A true blogging success.

    Happy Blogiversary, Bossy! You are funny and very creative. And I can totally see the Anne Lamott comparison.

    Here’s to another great year filled with great ideas and funny posts!

  6. Happy Bossiversary, Bloggy.

    FYI- Dog slobber is corrosive and a bleaching agent. Try it on pigment spots. It will also do as an eye-firming treatment in a pinch. You’ll look fabulous, you’ll just smell a little funny.

  7. Happy birthday! You don’t look a day over 8 months.
    Dog slobber is in ample supply around here. I’m going to have to test out the eye-firming treatment.

  10. Haha, great list bossy. I don’t know, maybe an upholstery cleaning blog could be pretty exciting. It all depends on what you’re cleaning off the upholstery! 😉

  14. Happy blog birthday, Bossy! The blogosphere would be a bleak, sad, hellish place without you! Or, a MORE bleak, sad, and hellish place anyway…