i am bossy was recently reviewed over here. Bossy scored 44/70, 5.24, with a Total Score of 61! And there were even more numbers like 3/5 and 8 and Bossy isn’t certain what any of the numbers mean but she’s pretty sure she won’t be elected this year’s Avon World Sales Leader.
It seems most of i am bossy’s problems lie in the overall design. That and the content. This seems easy enough to fix because Bossy is nothing if not a Clutter Nazi, which brings Bossy to her first item up for sale:
Bossy’s bio buttons and links are confusing and redundant and who does she think she is wearing both orange and turquoise? These very special triptych buttons would clearly be perfect for a Great Dane breeder or an Eyeball Surgeon. $0.35.
These two highly acclaimed awards are yours for two easy installments of ninety-nine ninety-nine. How about nineteen-ninety-nine? Nine?
This highly effective visual campaign is a call to advertisers everywhere. Sidebar titles, links, underlines, and two different fonts included! A steal
at a buck-twenty-fivey-nine.
Come on — you already have a Find Food Drink but it’s faded and torn in the ass. This one comes with a Still Searching For Food Drink. No wonder Bossy is swimming in her yearly GoogleAd income of three half pennies — and you can be too!
Where else can you purchase a link to a bogus popularity contest whose categories are so obscure that you hardly notice that the voting deadline has been extended until you’ve lost all will to live? Lifetime of Penile Enhancement emails free with your purchase.
This is only a partial list of the Blogger friends Bossy is willing to sell. They may look a little mildewed but Bossy assures you that some bleach and elbow grease will make them as good as new. But that cat smell? That will never leave. $0.25.
One BlogHer link for sale. Bossy thought she’d wear it all the time after she fixed the hem but it turns out tie-dye went out of style in the 1500s. Like new. Eleben dollah.
Buying this t-shirt link is like buying a Velvet Elvis painting with a hidden Picasso under the mat board! Bossy’s talking about an unlimited revenue stream! She’s talking about it, and now all she needs to do is find it! $1.05.
This is not for sale. Put your roll of hundreds back in your pocket. Did you know Bossy enlarged this cock herself? And she drew it too. With her
pricey Adobe Photoshop free Graphic Converter.
The word shit can be traced to the year 1118 (wearing gloves of course.) The Anglo-Saxons used the word scittan in reference to cattle diarrhea as indicated in the following Latin text: “Lues animalium, quæ Anglice Scitta vocatur, Latine autem fluxus interaneorum dici potest.” In Bossy’s case, this shit’s gotta go. $0.Sebenty-Seben.
This is possibly the worst Blog description eh-ver. According to the Blog Reviewers it doesn’t come close to describing the scattershot, whimsical, directionless effort that is i am bossy. Buy now and Bossy will include the copyright for the phrase, “Depending on the kindness of mediocrities.”
One million yen.
This Guess-and-Press is a big hit! With Bossy’s friend Amy! And virtually
millions thousands hundreds tens more of you! It’s almost as big a hit as when Bossy wimps out crosses out phrases! Stinky big! Gimmic hit!
Let’s look at the above thumbnail example of the Guess-and-Press, shall we? Hmm. It looks like flower petals and flower colors so Bossy is guessing the photo is of a man purse. Sold! Sixth Cents.
And now for the postpenultimateultimate item up for sale:
And this one too. And especially this one and this one. In bold too.
Who needs different colors if your posts are well written? Oh. Never mind. Bossy will keep this color. And this.