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This Old Gingerbread House – the Home Inspection Report.

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  • Replace existing roof with GAF Timberline shingles.

  • Add an Ice and Water Neoprene Protectant.

  • Repair gutters in rear elevation and add new Seamless Copper Gutters to front and side elevations.

  • Replace dry rot siding on south side of house.

  • Fill sinkhole near rear door.

  • Address poor site drainage and water run-off problems in front and north side of property.

  • Repair the foundation’s structural bulge due to bond brick failure.

  • Replace the missing Expansion Joints in rear masonry wall.

  • Restore broken window sash.

  • Seal all window pulleys.

  • Weather-strip ground-level casement windows.

  • Re-glaze broken attic window.

  • Replace leaky outdoor spigot.

  • Replace water pipes in first floor bathroom due to scale deposits.

  • Add additional electrical circuit and fuse the No. 12 conductor with
    15-amp protection.

  • Replace faulty receptacles throughout.

Reader Interactions

Comments

  7. My daughters recently built a gingerbread home clearly without following the California building code for earthquake safety. There was just the tiniest movement of the foundation and CRASH. Poor little gingerbread men were trapped underpiles of rubble. It was tragic.

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  11. I think the Witch has a lot of work to do before she will be able to unload this house on Hansel and Gretel…
    At least she doesn’t have to worry about market-value assessment issues!

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  17. I think Bossy’s little confection has “good bones” and “loads of character”! Which is how our realtor described our hellpit when she was trying to sell it to some unsuspecting schmuck.

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  21. where did you get the plans of house shown in photo. I happen to know that these are the same plans proposed by the Bush Administation for the 9th ward in New Orleans. Minus the frills.

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  23. It’s a scaper. Tear it down and go with a more modern home. 20 Pirouettes sticking up out of a bowl of Haagan Daz, perhaps? Or a sushi tower flanked by a ginger pond? Nothing brings up resale value like sushi.

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  24. I would love to live in a house like that. I had an osmotic education in home repair and maintenance as a child and I enjoy putting it to good use.

    I even have some professional experience, but only with gutters. You would be surprised how important clean, functioning gutters are to the rest of a house.

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  31. I never would have thought to put icing ALL OVER the house! That freakin’ ROCKS! YUM! (Did that make it soft enough for Bossy’s daughter to enjoy?)

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  35. That’s good that bossy’s coming up with creative projects to lift bossy’s daughters spirits. I’m so clueless I tried to buy a “gingerbread house KIT” but the store was sold out! What am I to do? Follow bossy’s suggestions I suppose…

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  37. But under the cheap flooring are REAL HARDWOOD FLOORS, and the view of the citrus groves is unbeatable.

    What’s a little tent living between friends? Happy remodel!

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  38. I bought a gingerbread kit for the kids and busted it out last weekend during The Biggest Snowfall In Thirty Years and it produced what looked like a crack house.

    Yours though, it’s lovely. Sounds a little high maintenance, though.

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  43. First off, you MUST address the issue of the “floppy foundation”, it looks like any water, and it will go in a flash.

    Second, I agree about Ty Pennington! Tell the man your horrible dog-mauling story, he’ll be all over that in a heartbeat. Can Bossy say big-screen-plasma?

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  44. “Just eat it (eat it), eat it (eat it), no one wants to be defeated… show ’em how funky and strong is your fight, it doesn’t matter who’s wrong or right, just eat it…”

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  50. Omg! You are so funny and you sound like you’re in better spirits. Glad to see that! Now I must go check our gingerbread houses for violations. Can’t afford any fines should an inspector happen by.

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  53. Please don’t be evil anymore god

    I perceive a level of “magic” surrounding Osama Mobarack, a red flag.
    The gods offer a clue through his name.
    It’s one thing to understand the concept of “acceptable losses”. It’s quite another to promote them::::His deal with the record company executive suggests he preys on the disfavored.
    Despite the preditory even that was the impeachment of her husband in the crucial years of 1997-1998 and her continued loyalty to Bill Clinton, Hillary is a better choice for the disfavored.

    The fiasco over his $400 hairdo captures my attention and makes me think John Edwards may be the right candidate, the one with the most empathy for the disfavored.
    Without a doubt:::The best hope is the first to fall.

    “We make evil look good.” And then use it as a corruptor.
    Look how these wicked, immoral Manifest Destiny gangsters, the kind of individuals who planned WorldWarII, come across merely as businessmen. As they’re doing with the strategically preditory personality baseball player, as they’ve done with Preditory Italian Company, who merely exists as a Manifest Destiny talking heads for the blue chippers in the “eye of The Beast”.
    And they dirty up good, as we see with me, as we saw with Bonds.
    Much as with all the other empty promises, I will be CHEATED out of the fulfillment of the HTH entitlement. As a result I DEMAND you address the history of the individuals involved, public and private, current and FORMER LIVES. We’ll see who the fuck is evil then.
    Criminals doing business with criminals.

    And courtesy of M&A you do business with this evil every time you patronize corporate.
    The Amish in Pennsylvania is the clue:::Set a goal of simplicity, strive for purity.

    ———————————————————————————————–

    Their “cheap tricks” are preditory:::poker, cars, boss, movies. Every item of the $50 billion is all evil, designed to prey on the disfavored, a clue regarding modern popular culture and society. Perhaps not so “cheap” after all.
    “You’re going to throw this away. We’re not going to be blamed for this.” Yea, right. Like their assumption of culpability has got value. Fuck you god.
    The Final Prophet is merely a formality, like they gods are required. It’s kind of like “Black off the books.wav”:::An event designed to merely meet some policy requirement while ensuring the disfavored have no real hope:::Life in the ghettos of California.
    The god’s efforts to minimize my impact is consistant with their methodology, ascention becoming increasingly harder as time progresses, suggesting we really are approaching The End.

    “We’re going to enforce positioning.” You better make them get their hands dirty AND BRING BACK THE 20TH CENTURY FOR THIS. Killing fucking niggers in celebrity clone hosts AIN’T no fucking fun.
    I merely want the same preditors who willingly hurt the people I try to help. I realize there was lots of magic employed, enabling things like monster arena tours, other all-consuming offerings to happen. But too many in these clone hosts were active preditors.
    The Situation is VERY 20th century. Maintain consistancy, please.
    But I won’t hold my breath.

    Brokeback Mountain says you understand:::Fuck off god.
    Things I’ve ruined::::Midnight Madness. Note that to the gods both are merely cheap tricks.
    Denying money is one of the goals of positioning in the Italians::::The gods used this evil to ensure the Final Prophet was not financed.
    The gods took special but played for commoner. Now this Situation passes without affect because special is a one-way street. The gods instructed AI to deny my ability to be articulate. As a result people weren’t receptive::::The “back-hand” was very real. The “help” was not.
    I won’t invest when absolute power must CHEAT to win. This IS the event. Learn.
    I am disgusted the gods position absolution for themselves because it is their technology conducting this evil upon the disfavored. When the disfavored understand this tactic hatred will eliminate a large percentage of them.
    Sinisterly, wickedly brilliant.
    What I woudln’t do for a fair fight:::The emperor has no clothes.
    I can’t express my disgust enough. 2007 was MY YEAR, yet you ruined it whimsically because you refused to pay consideration on this obligation you assumed, claiming since I didn’t pray I wasn’t allowed my ability. Of course my abilities would have countered your interests. How convienient. AND another tactic.
    I think we needed ground rules in this thing. Again, convienient AND a tactic.
    Fuck you god. You are a sick joke.
    I’m not investing. I wouldn’t knowingly help the elite who you used to prey on those I try to help. I want this preditory evil dead.
    Guess I can’t count on HTH. I was hoping it meant I was being assigned to this task. I want to be an enforcer of decency.
    Lake Michigan is defnintely not a self-reference.
    ———————————————————————————————-

    Said Italy has heavy volcanic activity for kinda the same reason they put the Mormons in hell.
    Motherfuckers. Serves them right.
    Of the male Italians in the United States 1906 worked on at least half of them.
    I say the number is closer to 80%.
    Of those AT LEAST HALF were corrupted voluntarily, meaning the gods did not push them into being evil. This half should already be dead. This is an immoral people, quick to prey on others, as their history suggests.

    Understand the god’s methodology, for it will help you decipher future events. KKK killings are a good example::::
    The gods either told or pushed the black males into acting up. Rednecks, corrupted by 1906, thought their participation would help them. Many believed it gained them protection from their illegal bootlegging activities.
    They role played 1906 to Italians, told them that their fellow Italians were using this platform of 1906 to achieve global economic domination, and told them that if they wanted a piece, if they wanted to belong and be a part of this they’d do what they’re told.
    They illustrated the Moorish invasion, and the gods pit the Italians against the morbidly disfavored blacks. 90%-95% of the KKK incidents were Italians who did the actual killings.
    This is a good example of how the gods get the disfavored into place to fuck everybody involved.

    Alcohol has always been a way of hurting the men, making them less than decent.
    Cultures which offer wine have women who consume wine, and the result is an indecent society. Combine this with Italian male’s demand for sexual satisfaction without the consideration of decency and you have masculinized women and a morbidly disfavored society.
    Anyone involved in the wine industry has no empathy for either the disfavored of the Mediterreanean basin or women, disregarding the superior gender. If they understand this as the goal and are sold on “earning” they will be punished very harshly.

    “They deliberately planned those things (90s “parting shots”:::The Sitution, end-of-revelry cycle media preditation, AIDS in Africa). When they found out the truth it was too late.” HTH supports this. They shared they instructed his grandfather preyed on women emotionally to set the legacy necessary for the late 90s event. And of course 95% of the KKK deaths were revenge killings for the Moorish invasion of Italy. I believe 1906 is responsible for the economic repression of not only Africa but also the American ghettos.
    “(Blah.)” Expect we won’t see such activities on the income statements. Italians may be stupid but they’re not positioned to be THAT stupid.
    That monster who laid the legacy still alive? “He’s been a pig a couple of times.” He needs to be dead, as do the half who signed on to 1906 voluntarily.

    New Orleans/Louisiana is French, while California is positioned as Italian.
    Katrina was used to help the disfavored escape that wicked enviornment. Blacks in California won’t be so lucky.
    Know who your friends are.

    Flanders is the shining example of a role model, but his parents were wicked. They were beatniks, the original hippies, purveyors of social poison, etc. Incidentally, beatniks emerged from the Italian North Beach neighborhood in San Francisco as a clue.
    Because Flanders was raised in that evil enviornment his mind was poisoned. Only through understanding was he able to alter his behavior and become decent. Because of it he provided Rod and Todd a REAL chance, one that he will receive in the next life as well, but he can’t go up because of his youth.
    My advice is recognize Flanders is offered as a role model and emulate this decency. Do the very best you can with your children and perhaps the gods will see fit to bless you with a real chance much like you gave your children.

    Manifest Destiny’s WWII project produced Port Chicago which was parlayed into civil rights.wav
    And these Italians who helped plan and impliment WWII thought they were in charge because of 1906. It shows the moral vacancy of the Italians involved.
    Poetic justice that the gods funneled these monsters through the Nazi death camps.
    I demand the lives of those involved, the MD Italians who initiated and implimentted this plan to destroy my life in the years before they were shipped off to the Nazi death camps for this poetic justice.
    And they’ll do ANYTHING they’re told. That’s why the 20th century was so disturbing.

    Prior to civil rights blacks had their own press. In the absence of civil rights these entities would have grown into legitimate media outlets serving the black community.
    Maintaining segregation would have produced economic entities which arose from within the black community to fill the demand for goods and services.
    The presence of these “black industrialists” would have FORCED the gods to factor them into positioning, producing voices in support of the black community and preventing the gods from inflicting ALL THE SICKNESS WE HAVE WITNESSED IN THE last few decades::Crack babies, drive-by shootings, AIDS in Africa, drought/famine!!!
    I have mentioned people can expect an AIDS crisis among heterosexual blacks here in the United States. Considering that the fastest growing industry in the ghetto is the oldest profession on Earth expect them to be the targets of this punishment.

    Italians/Romans are imperialists. They finaince their lifestyles off other people’s misery.
    Black people’s misery. Blacks are the targets of this imperialism, and as a result it is IMPERITIVE they learn empathy, for this has been the case back to the age of Pharroh.
    Imperialist pigs are an important dynamic to implimenting the god’s strategies on this planet. As a result most Italians will be compensated with some time. Blacks will not be so lucky because they fail to recognize the difference between preditor and prey.

    The gods ARE responsible for the evil of their technology. Their attempts to position away this culpability is a tactic, one they will use to further shrink the number of disfavoreds who suceed.

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