First of all Bossy apologizes for not posting yesterday. She’s been having a few issues with her computer—no biggie, it’s just that she can’t open emails. Or send emails. Or access Google Maps. Or open Microsoft Word. Or save documents. Or go online.
Lucky thing Bossy isn’t planning a multi-city Road Trip, because that would just be bad timing. Instead red-faced Bossy screamed and cried and then fell asleep in her car seat. Things are much better today.
Which brings us to our tutorial: How To Cook Like A High School Senior. You see, Bossy’s husband recently celebrated a birthday, where celebrated equals being yelled at for his mess of paperwork, followed by fisticuffs regarding his heaps of junk.
You’ve heard of the State of the Union? In Bossy’s house they regularly hold forth about The State of the Basement. But this post isn’t about Compulsive Hoarding and how Oprah’s experts say it’s covering a darker emotional need—and just why would you think it was?
No, this post is about Bossy’s Husband’s birthday. In Bossy’s house, the family doesn’t make a big production about exchanging presents. Which is just another way of saying Dear Lord Are They Ever Going To Increase The Minimum Wage? Instead Bossy’s family expresses their gratitude for each other and their tangle of crusty belongings in other meaningful ways.
Which is how it came to be that Bossy’s son volunteered to prepare the birthday supper. First he situated the boneless chicken breasts:
After pounding them flat with a
meat tenderizer can of mushroom soup, he dredged the chicken in flour:
Next he dunks the chicken in an egg mixture followed by a dip in bread crumbs. Then he puts the chicken in a pan for sautéing:
With the chicken batches sautéed and warming in the oven, Bossy’s son begins his sauce. He adds white wine and lemon juice to the pan drippings:
After finishing his sauce with a pat of butter, Bossy’s son turns his attention to the side dish. He drains boiled potatoes and then mixes them together with butter, milk, and fresh chives:
With everything complete, Bossy’s son plates the food. Which everyone knows is not the same thing as putting food on plates:
And then it was time for the final step of the preparation. The Touchdown Dance: