Because today Bossy would like to talk about Jeans. Yesterday she found
this article which focuses on the importance of selecting a pair of jeans that match your body type, so for instance if you are petite you should try to elongate your body with tight-fitting legs and a lengthy boot cut, and if you’re full-figured you should go for a dark denim wash and a slight flare, and if you’re built like a boy you should eat a stack of donuts and keep quiet.
Bossy became particularly intrigued with the description of the Pear-shaped figure and the dark, wide-leg jeans that minimize the effect. The article suggests that certain clothing companies do this best—such as Seven, Joe, DKNY, and the Gap.
Well Bossy looked up these companies, and she found this:
And she found this:
And she found this:
Could someone please explain to Bossy why jeans that are designed to fit
big bottoms are modeled by tongue depressors?
Because as far as Bossy can see, the only way a pear is going to fit into any of these jeans is if that pear is sliced thin and baked in a galette. With chocolate sauce.



Momo Fali says
March 13, 2008 at 9:52 amIn 36 years, this pear has never found a pair she likes.
Patricia says
March 13, 2008 at 9:55 amDang! I think I am a pear shaped, big bottom petite – I didn’t see that combo mentioned.
I find that the Mark’s Work Wearhouse (do you have that in the states?) has styles that fit me best. And no, I do not mean the overalls!
Miss Wisabus says
March 13, 2008 at 9:57 amGap’s Boot Cut Stretch seems like it would be good for a pear, even though I’m an apple and prefer mine sprinkled with cinnamon and sugar and baked.
RuthWells says
March 13, 2008 at 9:57 amI’m pear-ish, myself, and have had luck with Ann Taylor Loft boot-cut (on the higher end) and with Old Navy “Sweetheart” cut (on the lower end). Be prepared to try on a zillion pairs at Old Navy, though, as no two size 8s are cut the same….
Lauren says
March 13, 2008 at 10:00 amWhatever it was you were wearing to the bowling party looked fine? I’m not much use, so I will shut up.
Bossy's reader Shania says
March 13, 2008 at 10:02 amBossy’s reader Shania is a petite, full figured gal. Not pear shaped, I’m equal opportunity round top and bottom. Did they have anything in the article about apple shapes? Old Navy makes the best medium rise, boot cut jeans that help minimize what my mama (and all those boxes of girl scout cookies) gave me.
bv says
March 13, 2008 at 10:03 amfolder_id=2534374302024172&bmUID=1205416822226&SELECTION<>theme=Default” rel=”nofollow”>http://www.torrid.com/torrid/store/nodePage.jsp?FOLDER<>folder_id=2534374302024172&bmUID=1205416822226&SELECTION<>theme=Default
Jeans for Big Bottoms for girls with Big Bottoms.
Lynne says
March 13, 2008 at 10:11 amNobody is more pear shaped than me! One word: sweatpants.
mp says
March 13, 2008 at 10:13 amI like Jeans #3.
The ONLY pair of jeans I ever bought that I loved so much I wanted to marry came from Lucky Jeans..They were over $100. I’ve gained 10 lbs, they don’t fit anymore. I WILL get back into them by fall.
Rosie says
March 13, 2008 at 10:14 amI second Shania’s rec for the full figured apple.
I’m built such that if it fits my ass I can’t button most pants without a massive roll. If it fits my waist then my ass isn’t big enough to hold them in place and I spend the day tightening my belt (thus making another roll) and tugging up my pants.
I hate pants.
I hate being shaped like The Fruit of the Loom guy.
College Mama says
March 13, 2008 at 10:15 amI’m a Banana Republic and a Gap girl. I particularly like Gap Long and Lean (of which I am neither) but they fit well and help create the illusion of being long and lean.
Sarah is Ok says
March 13, 2008 at 10:19 amLike mp up there, my favorite jeans that I could have…what did she say? Marry? Yeah, I’ll go with that even though my past suggests I’m more of a sleep with ’em a few times and send them on their way. Either way, I would have had a fling or married the only jeans I ever had that I paid over $100 for. They were maternity, though, but don’t think I don’t still consider digging them out of storage 2 1/2 years later.
So am I recommending something? Yeah, the box of donuts.
Grandma J says
March 13, 2008 at 10:22 amBossy can wear anything! Once upon a time, in my former life I could pick and choose but not anymore.
I’m what you might call Butterball Cute or more like size 8 squared.
My favorite store is Avenue. They have pants that actually come up to your waste. They have lots of stuff with stretch, and it bounces back and doesn’t sag or droop. I like that in a pant because I can do all the sagging and drooping quite well all by myself.
Grandma J says
March 13, 2008 at 10:27 amI see that Bossy is getting ready to head on out on her Excellent Road Trip in less than 2 weeks.
Is Bossy gonna leave Bert stranded on that rig FOREVER?
This is so unrelated, I know.
ash says
March 13, 2008 at 10:32 amThis is exactly why I refuse to wear jeans! Let us know if you find some great ones, there might be help for the rest of us!
Hicky says
March 13, 2008 at 10:32 amat the risk of sounding too fancy, i’ll tell you that EVISU jeans have done so much for me since i discovered them last year. the fit on the ass is great, and so is the pocket illustration… for my first pair of jeans over $100, these things were amazing!
The Domestic Goddess says
March 13, 2008 at 10:33 amYou know, you can get those same jeans for half the price at Plato’s Closet in Springfield…
Mayberry Magpie says
March 13, 2008 at 10:40 amI’m so pear the real pears hate me. I’m a pear caricature. And THERE ARE NO JEANS IN THE WORLD flattering to pears. Pears of the world unite! Fight denim tyranny!
Norma Rae
aka Mayberry Magpie
http://www.mayberrymagpie.com
Elizabeth says
March 13, 2008 at 10:40 amYour Google Ad seems to think you should check out indi Custom Denim. aren’t they helpful? 🙂
I agree with Grandma J about Avenue, but those are also for plus sizes starting at size 14. I’ve had luck with Land’s End jeans.
David says
March 13, 2008 at 10:46 amI always buy only one brand of jeans. They’re called “On Sale.” I particularly like the “50% Off” style of that brand.
Average Jane says
March 13, 2008 at 10:48 amI’m all about the Lee One True Fit jeans. Unfortunately, I’m not wearing them right now because a sudden onslaught of poundage has caused all of my old jeans to suddenly turn on me in an unattractive and painful way. I’m back to my “just started to lose weight the last time” Gap jeans and a pair of Converse One Stars from Target that are way too long and need a belt after the first wearing. Sigh.
Kyddryn says
March 13, 2008 at 10:52 amLane Bryant red six jeans fit me like a dream – but I am rather large and have a fifty-acre ass.
Shade and Sweetwater,
K
Amanda says
March 13, 2008 at 11:01 amI just found a pair fo jeans I love, not to long, not too short ( in the butt and the length.) Try Aeropostale Chelsea boot cut jeans. I went back to get a second pair with no luck of finding them in my length:( The best thing about them is they were only $30.00. When and if you travel through Ohio I will take you there:)
vuboq says
March 13, 2008 at 11:01 amvuboq knows nothing about women’s jeans nor this pear-shaped thing of which you blog. vuboq likes pears though, esp. a salad of spring greens with red pears, blue cheese, and walnuts topped with a yummy balsamic vinegrette. MMM. Mmm.
[vuboq recently bought a pair of Genetics Jeans, mainly because he liked the bad pun … well, that and they make his ass look super-cute(r).]
jesslo says
March 13, 2008 at 11:04 amI would like to say how amazing it is that the article was on an NBC news website. Journalism at its finest.
For jeans…slightly pear shaped but in the next 7 months will grow to be more of a candy apple on a stick (that’s right i’m growing a baby). Anyway I like Gap Long and Lean (but they used to make them without spandex, which always seemed more flattering)–jeans that are spandexy always tempt me to buy in a size too small, because I like seeing the little number, but then I take them home and realize in my at-home mirror that they are not so flattering. Darn it! Take out the spandex!
Maria R says
March 13, 2008 at 11:05 amWell, as a life long pear shaped (Rubenesque is really a more appropriate word) I have given up and went with ‘mom’ jeans from Lands’ End.I know it’s making bossy and all the other pear shapes shudder when I say that. LE had a really great pair that are, of course, discontinued which doesn’t help bossy….they were dark, not to short in waist but low cut and not too wide in the legs but funky enough so your kids friends would think you were cool when you dropped ’em at the mall.
Jessica says
March 13, 2008 at 11:06 amI hate trying to buy jeans. They’re either too short, too tight, or just look plain ridiculous.
joeinvegas says
March 13, 2008 at 11:09 amGeez, I’m so distracted by that pear dessert I can’t even think of jeans (well, maybe what goes into some of them). Will we soon have recipes here?
MamaMo says
March 13, 2008 at 11:09 amGo back to loga yants – more comfortable in the car. Though my favorite pants are NOT jeans (I’ve never had much luck with them), they’re cotton/spandex (yeah! strechiness!) cords by a.n.a. from JC Penny.
The Domestic Goddess says
March 13, 2008 at 11:11 amOh yeah. You wanted a brand. I like Lucky Jeans, now.
JK says
March 13, 2008 at 11:11 amTry Levis 515 Bootcut. The beauty is you can get them in your size (OO, right? Sure, me,too. Why not? ;))and your length. S = short, M= medium, L = Long. (I know: “duh!” But I’m helpful like this.)
Here’s my shopping advice: Kohls sell these & they go on sale frequently. And Kohl’s has dressing rooms. Now after you know what size you are and whether or not you like these jeans, BJ’s Wholesale has them. Yes way, Mrs. BOSSY. For 19.99 no less.
Happy shopping.
lintys says
March 13, 2008 at 11:13 amMy pear shape fits nicely into a pair of dkny, Level 99, Calvin Klein, or Tommy Hilfiger. . . tall, bootcut, and stretch, with low, flat, properly-sized patch pockets, mid-to-low rise. I have more than one pair and style of each of those brands. No mom jeans for this grandma.
lintys says
March 13, 2008 at 11:15 amp.s. and about half of them came from tj maxx or marshalls.
notjustbarbra says
March 13, 2008 at 11:22 ammmmmm… galette… ((drool))
what were you saying? Oh jeans? I got mine from the petites section at Nordstrom. I hate buying jeans. But I also have some Levi’s that work all right. (My butt is huge.)
Deb on the Rocks says
March 13, 2008 at 11:25 amI think your readers should bring forth pairs for you while you are on your trip that you can try on–sort of like a find the jeans that fit the queen fairy tale. The rejects can be returned, so no-harm no-foul, and the winner can receive a prize, perhaps a ride around the block with you and something from your basement.
One thing is for sure: avoid cleavage of all types with the jeans selection.
Laura says
March 13, 2008 at 11:31 amMaybe we shoud ask Beyonce or JLo what kind of jeans they can squeeze into-after all they are truly the ultimate pear-shaped divas I know. Anyway, I like whatever looks good and feels good.
Evolving says
March 13, 2008 at 11:31 amCan we please sit on those models and force feed them croque monsieur? I don’t think their even wearing the brand of jeans their modeling for. They are probably just air brushed on.
I personally only buy no brand sale jeans from Ross. I really like supporting sweatshops in Thailand.
Cass says
March 13, 2008 at 11:39 amGap, long and lean, work sometimes for me. I had a pair that I wore every day and now they are ripped and worn out. I was still wearing them when they were ripped in the knee but then the ass fell off. Went back to get a pair exactly the same and they didn’t fit the same. WTF?
I almost cry when buying jeans. If they fit in the butt, then the waist is too big and they are five miles too long. Am I that disproportionate?
Blech.
Jennifer says
March 13, 2008 at 11:44 amOkay, I’m a curvy girl and I just bought a pair of Gap short Long and Lean jeans (does that make sense?) and I love them. But Bossy looks tall and could wear the Long and Lean jeans for regular people.
Good luck – I hate shopping for jeans.
andrea says
March 13, 2008 at 11:45 amI recommend Gap Curvy jeans. I got a pair for xmas and love them. And curvy is totally Gap’s nice way of saying fat ass and thunder thighs.
Renee in Seattle says
March 13, 2008 at 11:53 amSeriously. From a gal who gags and barfs if she has to spend more than $25 on ANYTHING…. every 5 years I choke up about $200 and buy the best designer jeans at Nordstrom and it is the BEST money I ever spend…. because I wear the CRAP out of them, and buy no others for 5 years until the threads fall off my body. My latest acquisition: 7 For All Man Kind, high waisted, flare leg, and remind this 38 year old of the 7th grade quite fondly.
Adorable Girlfriend says
March 13, 2008 at 11:56 amI am not saying anything. Ask UC. Once I said something about this and he had advice. Which means:
A. He’s gay (not that there is anything wrong with that).
B. His lunch time outtings need to be cut n half.
C. He takes being a Gene Dr. to a whole new level.
D. All of the above.
Foolery says
March 13, 2008 at 12:12 pmAll this talk of apples and pears and donuts has made me very hungry.
I am a pear, I suppose, but with linebacker shoulders and a butt the size of Texas. When I’m not busy mixing metaphors I resemble the Sta-Puft Marshmallow Man, and jeans of any stripe look hideous on me, but I wear them anyway.
Pleased with some $9.99 Levis Big-Ass Jeans I picked up while flying through Target before Christmas. Not sure they’re really called that.
I hope this helps.
meleah rebeccah says
March 13, 2008 at 12:13 pmand thats why I wear sweats and pajama pants.
Catherine says
March 13, 2008 at 12:15 pmI used to wear Lane Bryant jeans, until they changed their sizing. Now I’m between colors and numbers in all directions. I went to Macy’s grabbed about 10 pairs all in my size only paying attention to color (I like dark wash). After an hour I walked out with 2 pair, one in a size smaller than I expected. I don’t remember the brands, but I think they were Macy’s brands? In the end they were on sale too – so double score. Jeans I don’t hate and 2 pairs under $60 (together, not each).
I think the trick is going when you have the energy & tolerance to try on 50 gazillion jeans. Sometimes the same pair over and over again. The same size & style may not be cut the same from pair to pair.
You could also read Susan Wagner’s thoughts on jeans here http://fridaystyle.blogspot.com/2008/01/highwater-jeans-are-so-last-year.html
Paige Jennifer says
March 13, 2008 at 12:16 pmThe last time I went into The Gap, I perused the denim wall. I glanced at the piles and then looked at the photographs above each style, a waist down picture of how the cut fits. I figured this would help me differentiate between the styles.
Curvy…Boot Cut…Slim Cut…Boy Cut – it was the same fucking picture.
As for what I prefer – I would spend up to $250 for a pair of jeans if they fit like a glove. Lucky for me, Old Navy’s Sweetheart cut are divine and they ring in at $29.50.
Tootsie Farklepants says
March 13, 2008 at 12:19 pmBOSSY’s reader Tootsie is very tall with long legs and a high waist and somehow also manages to have a long torso. My favorite jeans are Levi’s 518 Super Low Bootcut LONG. They are not “super low” as the name indicates. They nestle comfortably at the top of my hipbone.
They are also affordable which I’m sure BOSSY can appreciate.
flutter says
March 13, 2008 at 12:21 pmAMEN Bossy.
I like The Gap’s curvy low rise jeans
Kathy says
March 13, 2008 at 12:22 pmI’m the opposite of a pear with a thick waist and no butt. Nothing’s better than plain ol’ Levis 505 or whatever the bootcut is numbered.
Oh, The Joys says
March 13, 2008 at 12:24 pmI think toughskins go really well with white tank tops. (har har har)
Belle says
March 13, 2008 at 12:26 pmLane Bryant are the most amazing jeans in the world. One they are color coded depending on your body shape, then they are sized to make us feel better. However you have to belarger than a normal size 14 for Lane bryant. I wear a 3 Red in the right fit jeans and they are amazing. Before I found these jeans I HATED jeans for years because I couldn’t find comfortable ones. Now, I only wear this jeans. And price wise, they run about $40. They are just fantastic and comfortable and I love them. I will never buy any other kind of jean ever again.
J says
March 13, 2008 at 12:30 pm2 words: Jag Jeans I love them and wear them everyday, a bit pricey ($100 or so), they have a little stretch and are the best jeans i’ve ever had. they have been going strong for over 2 yrs now!
http://shop.nordstrom.com/c/6005907/0~2376776~2374325~6005907?cm_ven=google&cm_cat=women&cm_pla=jag_jeans&cm_ite=jag%20jeans
mr.lootiatto says
March 13, 2008 at 12:31 pmI like Obama jeans.
Belle says
March 13, 2008 at 12:32 pmOhh I was just checking Lane Bryant for some info and they have a SALE!!!!! two for one…YEAH!!!!
ali says
March 13, 2008 at 12:39 pmmmm…chocolate sauce…
jeans are impossible to find. so i give up and eat more chocolate sauce…
sher says
March 13, 2008 at 12:40 pmi have an a$$ the size of wisconsin. so to say i am pear shaped is a little bit of an understatement. (there have been sightings of my waist in recent years.)
the best jeans i have found for people like us : Levis Perfectly Slimming Boot Cut 512™ Jeans. they’re jeans, and i hate boot cut to be honest, but they have some stretch for imperfect people. mercifully, they don’t look like old lady pants, either.
annie says
March 13, 2008 at 12:46 pmI watch “What not to wear” and they say unless you’re a toothpick, wear your jeans to fit the hips and then go straight down from there. ALL the jeans on display now look like the ones in the pictures.
Maybe the idea is to stuff yourself in and flatten everything.
Meg says
March 13, 2008 at 12:52 pmDKNY’s Stretch Soho Jean was worth every penny!
I also like the fit of the jeans at, believe it or not, the Bass/Van Husen outlet stores. Don’t know if they have them by you or you might need to journey up to Lancaster.
I am convinced Old Navy does not make any pants or jeans that properly fit any woman who has borne babies.
Jami says
March 13, 2008 at 1:08 pmAre the models in those pictures waiting for/hurrying out to the donut truck? They should be.
Hate buying jeans to the point that I just grab a bunch of what looks close to OK at Kohl’s, try ’em all on, take the one that looks least bad and then leave all the rest in the dressing room.
(The shoes in the first pic look kind of cute, though.)
S, says
March 13, 2008 at 1:09 pmJJill has great jeans that are very soft and light weight (great for us Southerners). Also, Chicos makes nice jeans, and the sizing rocks. I am a 1.5. Jealous? (OK, I am actually an 8-ish, but like the sound of one MUCH better) Both stores can be a little more than Gap, but there’s always EBAY!!! I love me some $10 JJill jeans. Basically, there are dozens of pairs of jeans in my closet, split into two groups: Hubby approved and Hubby hates.
Clare says
March 13, 2008 at 1:23 pmFor pear shapes or apples I like stretch pants in neon colors with slouchy low boots and stretched out really long cotton sweaters….add a lace bow/headband for the hair when going to a club, and maybe some rubber bracelets. On days you feel thin substitute a belly t-shirt with large black lettering spelling out ” healthy”.
Laura says
March 13, 2008 at 1:23 pmI am a fan of Buckle Jeans for sure, And At buckle I just found the new MKE brand love them. But my friends swear by Apple Bottom brand jeans for when baby has back. And they are cute as well. I just really strugle on the whole inseam factor, never long enough for me. Good Luck!!
Swistle says
March 13, 2008 at 1:24 pmHow can a pear-shaped person even tell what those jeans LOOK like, when they are modeled by…THAT?
Chesapeake Bay Woman says
March 13, 2008 at 1:25 pmResembling more of a Pear Meets Watermelon On Stilts, this fruit salad lover wears one pair of jeans, even though about 15 pairs are in my closet (in a pile on the floor for the cat to nap on):
LA Blues from none other than Fashion Bug. Very affordable (around $20-30 depending on sales) and very fruit flattering.
Clare says
March 13, 2008 at 1:27 pmOr Gap Curvy jeans…both choices are good.
psychophant says
March 13, 2008 at 1:40 pmEvery time I find a pair of jeans that look good on me they have spandex in them for “stretch”. I know your readers have been touting stretch jeans but here is a word of advice for your road trip. I live in the South. Heat and/or humidity does not go well with spandex in any amounts, even 3%. You will feel like you have wrapped your legs in Saran Wrap. I am talking hot hot hot! Sweat sweat sweat! This will apply for the western part of the country also. P.S. Also stay away from polyester unless it is a blend with cotton. Polyester is just another name for plastic clothes.
CarrieNealLand says
March 13, 2008 at 1:46 pmA post on Jeans?? I am in heaven and swear my undying loyalty to your blog. I agree with Renee in Seattle- 7 is good, and for me (I am tall) Rock and Republic is even better. Warning: they are expensive. But I live in jeans so I justify the cost on a price-per-wear-basis. Can’t wait to keep reading!!!
Grandma J says
March 13, 2008 at 1:51 pmOk, Tootsie Farklepants said, “They nestle comfortably at the top of my hipbone”.
My question, where the hell is that?
dgm says
March 13, 2008 at 1:51 pmThat Joe’s Honey Jean is great for the curvy (and very comfy). but I disagree about Sevens. They are cut very slender. Lucky makes some great, comfy jeans. I also like MEK Denim, which just started making them for the womens. If you don’t want to spend a lot, the Gap curvy bootleg will give you a good fit (as several others have attested to).
Go at once and check out zafu.com, which will ask numerous questions about your body type, preferences, etc. and return a list of jeans in all price ranges. I’m difficult to fit because I’m short and small but with muscular thighs and zafu.com has steered me in the right direction.
Redneck Mommy says
March 13, 2008 at 2:08 pmI have a habit of buying jeans because they look good on the mannequin or in the advertisement, only to find my jiggly arse and pasty white thighs, complete with my VERY own muffin top! do not look good in said jeans.
My ego is very fragile. My brain is very delusional.
stella says
March 13, 2008 at 2:14 pmBossy must have missed EXTRA last night when they discussed this very topic of proper fitting jeans – and FEATURED THE NUMBER ONE BEST SELLING JEAN –
PAIGE.
paige.paige.paige. its da bomb bossy. just TRY A PAIR FOR CHRISTSAKES.
and what is up with the picture of the last DUDE? IT LOOKS LIKE those jeans are on a KEN DOLL – complete with LOAFERS.
come to the dark side with me. I promise you’ll find something that just says:
I AM BOSSY – YOU CANT TOUCH ME!
-stella
Cactus Petunia says
March 13, 2008 at 2:17 pmBossy, I promise if you make it to Portland on your most excellent road trip, I’ll direct you to my favorite cheap jeans outlet…Goodwill. Trust me. You’ll never pay more than $6.99 (no sales tax) for a pair of jeans again! And denim without spandex? I think it may actually be against the Geneva Convention.
wellreadhostess says
March 13, 2008 at 2:18 pmTwo words:
YOGA
PANTS
Karen says
March 13, 2008 at 2:20 pmj jill, j jill stretch to be exact.
jodi says
March 13, 2008 at 2:46 pmDKNY…
Nothing else.
Andrea says
March 13, 2008 at 2:50 pmWhat I do is go to a store like ROSS – who carries all the brands for CHEAP, and often irregular, which is even BETTER when normal jeans don’t fit. Then I spend the better part of 2 hours taking all of the jeans in my size, whose wash I like, into the dressing room. Guaranteed to find a couple pair, every time!
Amy says
March 13, 2008 at 3:07 pmBossy:
This may well be the same model … in EVERY SINGLE PHOTO. Apparently, jean makers believe in only ONE body type.
Normal people don’t look like this. And I am a normal person whose belly and thighs don’t look like this chick’s. In fact, I don’t think my belly has ever looked like that.
amycates.blogspot.com
msLaura says
March 13, 2008 at 3:11 pmI love this site:
http://www.truejeans.com
Through them I found Chip and Pepper’s Stuffin for the Muffin jeans.
http://www.truejeans.com/jeans/style/Chip-and-Pepper/Stuffin-for-the-Muffin/504?w=895
These are awesomely stylish, and yet do much to prevent the dreaded Muffin Top effect. I have a 4yo and 1yo, so I’m still way loose around the belly. Not so fat, but loose and floppy.
These also curve in at the waist, so are great for bigger booties…no gapping in back.
Pretty goddamn expensive. But since I wear them almost every day and they will last a long, long time, I can justify it.
dlyn says
March 13, 2008 at 3:15 pmI hate to out myself this way, but my favorites at the moment are Lees which I believe I got at Wal*Mart. Dark wash, boot cut, slight stretch – they are perfect and make me look 10lbs lighter than any other pair I own. And cheap – leaves more money for pears and donuts.
jill says
March 13, 2008 at 3:16 pmI like Worn jeans. They sell them at Nordstrom. They aren’t cheap, but they don’t show your crack when you sit down, and they make my ass look smaller (sort of). They’re slimming, in any case. They do have some stretch– but not so much that suddenly your pants are falling down or sagging at the crotch after a couple hours.
Chicky Chicky Baby says
March 13, 2008 at 3:21 pmLucky Jeans are good, if you want to mortgage your house to buy a pair. But they make the booty look slammin’.
What does that mean, exactly?
I second another commenter’s nod toward the Gap Long and Lean. Not quite as expensive but the bottoms fray like a sumvabitch.
Fer chrissake.
Jen M says
March 13, 2008 at 3:48 pmGAP Boyfriend jean and JCrew both have flattering wearable jeans.
Seven Jeans are, in my opinion, meant for women under the age of twelve or whenever it was they got a period and started looking like a woman.
Gina says
March 13, 2008 at 4:01 pmI’m more hourglass than pear, but have same fit problems – small waist, big butt/hips/thighs and the Levi’s curvy cut are pretty good.
Nilsa S. says
March 13, 2008 at 4:02 pmSeven has jeans to fit the pear shape? Because my former (better) body used to have few curves and I NEVER fit into their jeans. I’m not sure they make sizes that big.
My favorite? Whatever costs under $100 and I can fit into. I’m very selective with my jeans.
anne nahm, Secret Agent (unauthorized) GAP Spokeswoman says
March 13, 2008 at 4:17 pmI’m not sure how this might fit in to your search, but I just stumbled over a fact that made Gap jeans worth trying on again:
“Curvy” jeans at gap are not for girls who are euphemistically called “curvy” – nor are “long and lean” ones for the tall skinny chicks. In fact, it is reverse. If you are trying to minimize your jlo booty, you wear “long and lean”. Like the power of positive thinking or something will shrink your cheeks.
Being curvy and wearing “curvy” apparently is like using a magnifying glass on your ass.
laura says
March 13, 2008 at 4:19 pmI’m a big hourglass (big boobs, pot belly, a wide flat butt, and a relatively small waist) and I’ve found Eddie Bauer shaped bootcut to be the best for me. They don’t gape too much in the back of the waist and the legs are just wide enough that I don’t look top-heavy. I haven’t tried any of the really expensive brands so I don’t know if any of them would fit me any better. There’s a site called zafu.com where you can enter your shape and your common problems with jeans and it will suggest brands. Eddie Bauer actually came out as one of my suggested brands. haven’t tried any of the others they recommended. (incidentally the site does bras too and the bra I wear was on my suggested list).
Kelly says
March 13, 2008 at 4:22 pmI’ve had luck with Ann Taylor Loft, and I’ve heard good things about Gap’s curvy fit jean. It’s all very annoying: the models that display this apparel, as you’ve aptly shown, are rails, and not at all comparable to a more realistic, curvy gal.
Kelley says
March 13, 2008 at 4:24 pmI have spent buckets on jeans and I have spent pennies. My favorite pair (which are starting to fall apart and I refuse to part with) are Lee jeans that I got for $15 on sale at Target.
Kristen says
March 13, 2008 at 4:27 pmGap is the only place I ever have luck. Bossy should look for something with a bit of stretch to them. They’re comfortable and they make your bum look all kinds of magnificent, even if it’s not.
Bossy should NEVER go to Old Navy for jeans! They don’t know what they’re doing over there.
Patti says
March 13, 2008 at 4:36 pmI would love to put my pear shape into those third pair of jeans, but I’ll have to pare off a few lbs before I’ll look anything like that tongue depressor.
Amy says
March 13, 2008 at 5:00 pmJoe’s, Seven, and Gap low-rise dark rinse boot cut.
I’d love to try a pair of Stella McCartney’s but even I get squimish about the heafy price (like $500 maybe?)
Julie Pippert says
March 13, 2008 at 5:02 pmOooh so true. And LMAO at tongue depressors BWAHAHAHA!
I am a boxy pear shape (you know, more Bosc than Anjou).
There is a local boutique in my neighborhood. It is owned by a classy broad who will not let you make an ass of yourself, at least not clothing-wise. She also provides a clearance back room where mere mortals can afford the clothes. And does not mock you if you only shop there.
I HIGHLY HIGHLY suggest finding a local boutique. They buy real clothes for real women, grown-up women. They are good quality, have character, and if one shops clearance one can get four outfits for under $100.
Also? They use actual sizes that are consistent, unlike SOME STORES (0ld N@vy) that shall remain nameless (0ld N@vy).
Julie Pippert says
March 13, 2008 at 5:04 pmP.S. Oh yes, stretch is essential.
My boutique today fitted me in a $180 pair of stretch jeans that were clearanced to $15. They are skinny jeans, and somehow do Very Nice Things for me.
Nancy says
March 13, 2008 at 5:06 pmThey only jeans that fit my odd shape are DKNY but, and I mean a bit butt … I only but them at TJ Maxx or Marshalls for $23-$25 bucks.
Unfortunately the low ride tends to create muffin top … even in the correct size!
This fact explains to me why in the past year the ugly “swing” tops are in style. I refuse to wear them. I look like a middle aged bimbo in a maternity top!
I’ll have to try GAP … looks like a few suggested them.
Cindy Z says
March 13, 2008 at 5:22 pmI only buy elastic, it is the american way 🙂 That should tell you somthing about my shape! I will admit, not only is my shape a problem but after a surgery ot two I only feel comfotable in elastic. Jeans are a distant memory.
Brava97 says
March 13, 2008 at 5:25 pmI’m on the Old Navy Sweetheart Boot-Cut train, but — and this is important — I buy the CURVY fit, which I have to order online because I’ve never found them in-store. (I even check Old Navy stores when I travel.) Same $29.50 price tag as the regular cut. But they don’t go on sale like the regular cut. It’s a conspiracy against pears!!!
Tanya says
March 13, 2008 at 5:50 pmYou know, that always pisses me off when they have fricken toothpicks modeling “curvacious” clothes, but my new favorite jeans for my pear butt are Levi’s 512’s and they are stretchy and comfy!
all things bd says
March 13, 2008 at 5:55 pmOld Navy jeans are the only ones I’ve found that work with me. I’m wide of hip, and they sell a curvy jean that won’t leave a mile wide gap in the back, letting everyone see my undies.
Amanda says
March 13, 2008 at 6:19 pmApple Bottom Jeans. Expensive, but so worth it for the lady packing junk in the trunk.
dgm says
March 13, 2008 at 6:20 pmJumping in again to give a shout out to Chip N Peppers (after I saw commenter Laura mention them). I heart my chipnpeppers as much as the Luckys and MEKs. Yes, they’re pricier than some but I wear jeans most of the time (except in the summer and fall when it’s too hot), so it’s worth it to me.
Denise says
March 13, 2008 at 6:31 pmThere is a line of jeans out called NYDJ, an acronym for “Not Your Daughters Jeans”. They are the best. They are not too low or too high and definitely are way better than Mom jeans. I got mine at Nordstrom. They have just the right amount of spandex and they hold in all the right things. The biggest plus – no coin slot in the back or camel toe in the front!
Mr Farty says
March 13, 2008 at 6:50 pmMmmmm, pears, apples, honey, marshmallow, peppers, banana, donuts, cookies…not so keen on tongue.
This is a food blog, right? Or am I being too selective reading your comments?
Not the Queen says
March 13, 2008 at 6:53 pmGap jeans are my favorite. I have long legs, and they’re one of the few brands I have found that does long jeans well. Plus, all of their fits and styles are comfortable.
Pear galette…yummy! I’ve never been successful with galettes, though.
bridget says
March 13, 2008 at 7:07 pmmy town just got a designer denim bar. I went for the free drinks and came out a BELIEVER and when I say AMEN. I mean it!
I got It jeans pricey but oh so worth it!
Inner Keening says
March 13, 2008 at 7:36 pmOOOH don’t even get me started on jeans. Why is it that my husband can take a $2 tape measure, wrap it around his waist, measure his inseam and go to a store and find jeans in those measurements when I go and find size 10 womens long, short, petite, medium, juniors (same choices) misses (same choices) petite (same choices) and once I do find a pair that fits, none of the other brands are the same sizes and don’t fit?????
Susan says
March 13, 2008 at 8:01 pmI second the Levi’s 515 Bootcuts. They’re the only jeans that’ve ever fit this pear shape.
moosh in indy. says
March 13, 2008 at 8:24 pmComing from a fresh whole pear I say BKE’s from the Buckle, as long as you can get over the pert 16 year old helping you I promise you can find something there.
jess says
March 13, 2008 at 8:48 pmi have a fat gut and a small bum. did anyone recommend pants for a girl who has a body like a plumber? cuz if they did, hook me up…
thanks.
Kat says
March 13, 2008 at 9:55 pmLucky Brand. You’d look good in them. Get a salesperson to help fit you. Robert Plant, Alison Krauss, Gretchen Wilson & John Prine can’t be wrong. Do your driving in yoga pants.
Jenn @ Juggling Life says
March 13, 2008 at 10:34 pmA lot of people know a lot more than I do about jeans!
Cheri says
March 14, 2008 at 1:26 amI didn’t read through Bossy’s gazillion comments, so I don’t know if someone already said this but try Christopher Blue. Nordstrom carries them. They aren’t the most expensive and they aren’t the cheapest, but they fit me like a glove. I like Gap and Lucky too, but my favs are my Christopher Blue.
Beverly says
March 14, 2008 at 2:41 amI’m pretty sure I have hair growing higher than where that first pair covers.
Starshine says
March 14, 2008 at 2:49 amBossy,
I am a pear if there ever was one. And I agree that tongue depressors don’t = pears.
That being said, the greatest fitting jean for this pear is made by the Gap. Ironically, it is called the Long and Lean fit. HA! It works for me, though! Love ’em!
Kelley says
March 14, 2008 at 4:56 amArrgghh!!! I don’t know any of these stores. Except for Kmart, *shudder*
I am an apple. And I hate apples.
Chantelle says
March 14, 2008 at 5:16 amThis pear like Gap flares. I have also had some luck with H&M is you happen to have one near you.
MizFit says
March 14, 2008 at 6:17 amHEARTING the gap here as well.
and wondering why PETITE (inseam not bod) jeans always have PLEATS in front.
you short?
you must not like fashion.
🙁
M.
MommyTime says
March 14, 2008 at 8:30 amI am a really truly pear — not a plus size, just a woman who has -gasp- hips and cannot wear those the same size as the hips. Well, technically, I can wear them, but only if I’m happy to have the whole world staring down the back of my pants at my undies. Which is so not cool when you’re 37.
My favorite jeans are a Lucky brand pair. I scored them at TJMaxx for about $40, which tells me they probably cost two-three times that somewhere. But I don’t know where they are normally sold. But as soon as these start to wear out, believe you me, I will find out. And I might even commit the shopping sin of paying full price for them because they are THAT good.
stella says
March 14, 2008 at 9:41 amholy shit. there is actually a jean called…
STUFFIN FOR THE MUFFIN??
omg. i am.
on.
the.
floor.
WendeeB says
March 14, 2008 at 10:05 amI love the Wrangler’s line called Aura. They fit me perfectly and even better, they recommend you choose one size smaller than what you actually wear. Who could resist?
Yvonne says
March 14, 2008 at 10:13 amThe best jeans by far for “curvy” girls, such as myself, are J-Lo Glo. I know, eewww, J-Lo, but her jeans are awesome. They’re built for girls with junk in the trunk and actually fit at the waist AND in the thighs without leaving your crack open for public viewing. The best part? I found them at Meijers and Kohls for about $20!!
Suzy says
March 14, 2008 at 11:29 amUmmmmm, pear galettes in chocolate sauce. I’m sorry, what were we talking about?
Jenny says
March 14, 2008 at 12:09 pmI like the Gloria Vanderbilt “Giselle” stretch jeans. Found them at Mervyns. They are boot-cut and come in regular and petite sizes. I do end up with a bit of a muffin top so wear a shirt that doesn’t tuck in.
nutmeg says
March 14, 2008 at 12:17 pm1972 Wranglers all the way!
MarthaMoth says
March 14, 2008 at 12:28 pmI have some Ernest Sewn jeans that were almost the rent on my first apartment; and a pair of Joe’s. The care tag says to dry clean only. Jeans. They feel, and look, like they are made of tissue paper. So far, the Target brand has been the best for me. But I am going to try some of these from Zafu.
Biddy says
March 14, 2008 at 12:35 pmwhose big bottom are you referring to? cause i’m pretty sure after the exercise post, bossy does NOT have a big bottom
Kathy says
March 14, 2008 at 1:28 pmThe best jeans I’ve ever worn are NYDJ (Not Your Daughter’s Jeans). They are available at Nordstrom. They are expensive. I have one pair that I’ve been wearing for two years and they hold up great. And, I’m definitely a pair shape! Try them!
Ree says
March 14, 2008 at 4:45 pmHoly Wranglers Batman, there’s a bunch of comments here.
Anyway, I have a round butt. Seriously round. Meaning it’s a pain in my arse to find a pair of jeans.
Levi’s 515s. Do NOT get the ones that have polyester in them. ONLY the 98% cotton, 2% spandex ones.
You will be in love. They’re the most comfortable jeans I’ve ever owned.
Beej says
March 14, 2008 at 5:53 pmI have had huge success with Gap’s Long and Lean jeans. I really have! I’m taller and fairly skinny (more ‘athletic’ than anything resembling a tongue depressor) but with some junk left in the trunk. They have done amazing things for me, especially when I wear them with boots.
Let me recommend that you DO NOT try Banana Republic’s denim unless it is a wider leg, trouser style. Their jeans really only look fantastic on size 4 and smaller. The same goes for most fits of Levi’s jeans.
Do you have an outlet mall nearby? Because that is the BEST way to get awesome brands for about $30 a pair.
rb says
March 14, 2008 at 6:01 pmI can’t tell whether you’re tall, but if you are I have a recommendation: Not Your Daughter’s Jeans. I know, the name sounds awful, but the jeans are pretty good. And longer in the rise, which is key for us tall girls. Also? You get to buy down a size. Or two!
crunchy carpets says
March 14, 2008 at 6:46 pmTrying living in Canada.
Try living in part of canada where the average jean shopper is a size 4.
I can’t even find decent jeans in my size….sigh.
Lori says
March 14, 2008 at 7:19 pmBaby, I’ve got back and I love dark denim at Harold’s. I know, I know Harold’s is soooooo country club chic and I’m all country and no club, but the jeans work.
Robin says
March 15, 2008 at 8:53 amTalbots. Strange, but true.
Judy says
March 15, 2008 at 10:26 amYou NEED these: Not Your Daughter’s Jeans. Wider hips, higher rise, and a sweet tummy panel that helps a lot! Also, they look pretty stylish.
Res Publica says
March 15, 2008 at 1:30 pmPants are for chumps. I just sit on the couch in my underwear and drink all day. It’s quite liberating!
Suzanne says
March 15, 2008 at 7:56 pmDear Bossy,
Lucky Jeans are what you are looking for. I love them almost more than I love my kids (but please don’t tell my kids). They are a little pricey, so I tend to buy sale or clearance. However, they last forever. I’ve had the same few pair for 5 or 6 years now and even with daily wear, they are in great shape. I am especially fond of the “Wonder” cut. Check out LuckyBrandJeans.com. Make the investment for a nice looking butt. =)
amanda says
March 16, 2008 at 10:42 amI bought some called Damage on Bluefly with two or three coupons, during a special sale, so they were a “steal” at $68. They offered a wee bit of stretch in the caboose and had an inseam that didn’t make me look like freaking Ichabod Crane waiting for a flood.
And those jeans you show? They’d only fit a pair of chopsticks.
Anna says
March 16, 2008 at 2:11 pmI agree with DM, I htink it was. The Joe’s Curvy-booty Honey fit works for me. They aren’t cheap, but have found them at TJMaxx and on Ebay for about $70 (shhhhh…)
Ivanna says
March 16, 2008 at 9:48 pmGap Long and Lean! It’s a miracle!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
bombaygirl says
March 16, 2008 at 11:34 pmI bought a pair at nordstroms called “Live a Little” They are my favorite pair by far!
Mary says
March 17, 2008 at 12:11 pmMy newest and very favorite discovery in the realm of blue jeans is Gloria Vanderbilt brand, style “Victoria”. You can find them at JC Penneys and probably some other department stores. I’m ashamed to say that my husband picked them out after my ass went ginormous since we got married. They’re the most comfortable, flattering jeans I’ve ever owned and they were only $25 AND the dark denim are dark enough that my boss thinks I’m wearing dress pants!
Jody says
March 17, 2008 at 8:24 pmI love the levi’s 515 bootcut, but a couple of weeks ago I bought a pair of dark denim bootcut jeans @ Walmart–Faded Glory brand. They were only $18 and some change.
I LOVE THEM.
Delinquent Debutante says
March 18, 2008 at 2:14 amSooo true about those skinny tongue depressors. Good jeans for the pear butt? Joe’s Jeans – the Honey cut.
erin says
March 18, 2008 at 5:02 amUnfortunately, I am the ultimate pear (thanks, mom). I recommend Old Navy Sweetheart jeans. They also come in tall:)
Victoria says
March 18, 2008 at 8:19 pmOoo. A topic close to my heart, and my day job. *grin* I’m a denim whore – I’m lucky enough to have custom-for-me Earnest Sewn’s (from their shop in the Meatpacking District, one of the cooliest days of my life). My faves? Vintage Wranglers (true!) and I-drive-a-mini-van-but-I-swear-I’m-still-cool Seven for All Mankinds.
Deana says
March 20, 2008 at 9:17 amBananna Republic are my fave casual jeans. I also like Lucky and have one pair of Seven just because for some reason I thought I needed to be cool and trendy but I am a low ride girl. I gain in the middle and to the hips so I need a low waist or my butt is too baggy. If I do that in a regular waist style I can’t breath!
orangeblossoms says
March 20, 2008 at 1:35 pmTongue Depressors….. haa. Okay. I love my Boyfriend Jeans from American Eagle. But nobody wants to hear about how a 37 year old woman adores her low rise hip-huggers…. am I right?