Recently Nikon sent Bossy a couple of lenses to sample—along with a Nikon D40 digital camera—while Bossy’s own gear visits camera rehab. Since Bossy normally uses an all-in-one lens, she was thrilled at this opportunity to learn the benefits of using the right lens for the job, where job equals Bossy spends the day in her pajamas writing poems about Viagra.
Anyway. Today Bossy wants to talk about one of the Nikon components on lend: the Nikkor 70-300mm Vibration Reduction telephoto lens.
Bossy never bothered to learn what those mm numbers etched on lenses mean, which shall be known as Problem #1. And Problem #2 is she just looked it up and she still doesn’t understand, because this is the definition: the numbers represent the distance between the focal lens found inside the camera, and the very front of the lens on your, em, lens.
Hi. Don’t you wish you had $100 for every time Bossy types the word lens?
From the above definition, 300mm is when Bossy’s telephoto lens is twisted all the way to the extended position, and 70mm is when her telephoto lens is collapsed, where collapsed equals Bossy has fallen and she can’t get up.
The point is, 300mm seemed like a nice high number compared to the 55mm maximum etched in her other lens, which is why Bossy grabbed the long lens to accompany her to the recent Philadelphia Phillies World Series parade.
Where parade = things happening far away.
But what Bossy failed to consider was what the 70mm lens minimum would mean. And, in technical terms, this is what it means:
What Bossy didn’t realize is that the 70mm minimum on her telephoto lens wouldn’t give her a wide enough angle to capture the pressing crowd on the sidewalk all around her. Of course, not all of her crowd shots turned out like the one above. Some were like this:
So instead Bossy needed to utilize the benefits of the long lens in order to capture what was going on, using subjects far from where she was standing:
And as the Phillies players got within range, perched along the upper deck of a few site-seeing buses, Bossy began to get the hang of the telephoto lens and was able to use it to capture the thickness of the crowd and the first approaching bus:
And it goes without saying there were other advantages to the telephoto lens, which is why Bossy is about to go ahead and say it:
Once home, Bossy opened the manual that accompanied the zoom lens and learned that the nearest possible focusing distance is 4.9 feet, which certainly accounts for the trouble she was having at close range.
And about that—the very next time the Phillies win the World Series, Bossy promises to read the directions that accompany her camera equipment before deciding which lens is most appropriate.