Bossy has two windows in her bedroom, but it’s the one directly next to her bed that she’d like to discuss today, where discuss equals she’s going to tell you something and then you’re going to call the psych ward on her behalf.
A few times a day for the nine years Bossy has lived in her house, a strange thingy will catch Bossy’s eye directly outside this window.
Maybe Bossy is busy not making her bed or maybe she’s not bending to pick up the magazines that litter the floor next to her pillow—when suddenly this thingy will distract her from the chores she’s not doing, and it will make her heart race a little.
There—do you see it? On the roof of the house next door!
It’s a rat! A silver rat! An enormous silver rat on the roof of the house next door!
And then Bossy will grab another look and be all, “Silver rat, my arse! You’re just a thingy! A vent thingy,” and Bossy is confident in her proclamation because chances are it’s only been fifteen minutes since the last time she had this conversation in her head about the silver rat on the roof of the house next door.
But it’s just a vent.
Except fifteen minutes from now, Bossy will climb her stairs to not hang up last night’s clothes, and she will think she sees the same silver rat all over again. Because that’s the way Bossy rolls, where rolls equals she hopes when the psych ward comes, they roll her out on a gurney.
Lastly, Bossy would like to announce the winner of yesterday’s contest. Congratulations Annie! Bossy emailed you.
margie saysNovember 13, 2008 at 11:22 am
Looks like a rat to me.
vuboq saysNovember 13, 2008 at 11:27 am
maybe if you thought of it as a Giant Silver Squirrel that would be better?
davido saysNovember 13, 2008 at 11:30 am
May be a rat, but you’ve clearly drawn a cat! — the ears are the giveaway.
Have a LOL cat day:
~annie saysNovember 13, 2008 at 11:41 am
Yes. Think of it as a CAT. That might help. Or maybe not look out the window? Wait! Just staying downstairs during the day would work, no? Made beds are highly overrated. ~ Total aside: I can’t wait for my toothbrush! Thanks!
Miss Britt saysNovember 13, 2008 at 11:41 am
I thought it was a raccoon. Even before the black sharpie explanation.
Lee saysNovember 13, 2008 at 11:42 am
Perhaps a harmless Armadillo?http://travel.webshots.com/photo/1012611731014565981RyfSIqmAho
Lee saysNovember 13, 2008 at 11:52 am
I guess people named Lee are similar in more ways than just the name – because I also saw armadillo right off the bat. I would suggest Bossy train her brain to see armadillo instead of rat. I think it’s less disturbing…at least in my humble opinion.
Alwyn saysNovember 13, 2008 at 11:54 am
You are so not crazy. Before you even went on to explain what you were seeing, I SAW IT and was a little bit startled. No gurneys for you, baby.
Debby saysNovember 13, 2008 at 11:57 am
I totally hit “Comment” instead of “Keep Reading” and then scrolled up thinking “my God that is a HUGE rat”.
You are not alone. Insanity craves companionship.
cartoongoddess saysNovember 13, 2008 at 11:58 am
That sure does look like some kind of metal rat to me. See ya in the psyche ward. We can trade wacky packs…
Jes saysNovember 13, 2008 at 11:58 am
I am from Texas – I saw an Armadillo and was thinking…what is an Armadillo doing in Philly?
elizabeth saysNovember 13, 2008 at 12:00 pm
have to agree with every one else, not a rat, my first thought was large lizard, but armadillo would probably be a better guess, per Lee and Lee.
I’d have to learn to live with that shade down. creepy indeed.
swistle saysNovember 13, 2008 at 12:02 pm
It looks like a giant iguana or a giant armadillo or some sort of giant TICK or something. (Move over, I’m coming with you to the ward.)
steph saysNovember 13, 2008 at 12:03 pm
I totally thought armadillo. I do that kind of thing all the time. Only I get so freaked I get chest pains. What, that only happens to me?
Nancy saysNovember 13, 2008 at 12:04 pm
A rat, I see a rat too.
BUT for 9 years?
One day, when they aren’t home, I’ll climb up there and cover it with something. Maybe a shingle?
Liz saysNovember 13, 2008 at 12:11 pm
It is CLEARLY… a giant, silver iguana.
Kris saysNovember 13, 2008 at 12:13 pm
That would make my heart race a little bit, too! I thought it was a rat.
corrie saysNovember 13, 2008 at 12:27 pm
That is verrrrry creepy!!
Of course when you’re busy doing other things your eye would catch that shape and startle!!
I would hope those little jolts are keeping your system revving though!
Heather saysNovember 13, 2008 at 12:37 pm
I LOVE it. I say climb up there and give it big bulging eyes and pointed ears and a long tail and name him “Enrico”.
Little Miss Sunshine State saysNovember 13, 2008 at 12:41 pm
First I said “Hmmm, Armadillo?” Then I looked closer and said “Hmmmm, Raccoon?”
Then you said “Vent” and I said “Uh-uh, Armadillo”
Dharmamama saysNovember 13, 2008 at 12:42 pm
It looks like a cross between a squirrel and an armadillo… squirreladillo? Heh. That’s fun to say!
Just name it, Bossy, and say hi when you see it each time.
Tootsie Farklepants saysNovember 13, 2008 at 12:48 pm
I did this with the scarecrow that I put in my own front yard- my own self- for the month of October. And every day I would catch it out of the corner of my eye and it would scare the shite out of me.
Can I come with to the looney bin?
Momo Fali saysNovember 13, 2008 at 12:49 pm
That vent is looking right at you!
HeyJoe saysNovember 13, 2008 at 12:59 pm
Thought it was a racoon myself.
Very bummed about the toothbrush. Was so looking forward to brushing my teeth for a change, but congrats to Annie.
Jessica saysNovember 13, 2008 at 1:14 pm
I thought it was an iguana. Even in the close up.
JustJuli saysNovember 13, 2008 at 1:15 pm
To back you up: I couldn’t tell that it was a vent-thingy at first, either. I thought it was some ginormous, misshapen squirrel.
yikes! It would scare me too!
David saysNovember 13, 2008 at 1:16 pm
Nine years? That would have to be one hardy and persistent rat. Did you see the movie Memento?
Jenn @ Juggling Life saysNovember 13, 2008 at 1:22 pm
It makes perfect sense to me. Maybe I’m a psych ward candidate too.
Reeb saysNovember 13, 2008 at 1:25 pm
Roof-dwelling armadillo. Or rare elusive giant silver chameleon/iguana thingy. POISED TO POUNCE. (Rats are much slimmer.)
Doesn’t that make Bossy feel more safe and secure now?
Glad to hear there are other Texas/ armadillo-seeing sorts out there. I spent an impressionable portion of my life in Texas where we had small cute chameleons and real armadillos — although the only armadillos I ever saw were dead on the road. But still one can tell their shape from that. Usually.
I like Heather’s idea. Enrico.
Working GIrl saysNovember 13, 2008 at 1:32 pm
I can’t see vent, only vermin.
Domestic Goddess (in training) saysNovember 13, 2008 at 1:39 pm
That is too funny. I have the same problem with a nail pop in the ceiling of my bathroom. I shower and see a black spider EVERY DAMN DAY! Just once I want to shave without slicing my leg jumping away from the spider that doesn’t exist.
Biddy saysNovember 13, 2008 at 1:42 pm
i totally see silver rat. my first thought, though, was a silver horned frog. but bossy lives in yankee country (not the team, just you know, the general northerner term) so it’s probably more like a silver rat or squirrel
danielle saysNovember 13, 2008 at 1:44 pm
I am dialing the number NOW. You obviously need help. That is not a rat missy, it’s a squiril!!! Now stay calm and wait for the ambulace to arrive.
annie saysNovember 13, 2008 at 1:50 pm
I don’t think a rat would have a month of dead leaves piled up against it’s ass.
Dang, how many “annie”‘s do you have now? I saw two others. That’s OK, I don’t want a toothbrush, I have one. I have lovely teeth, thank you very much
The Domestic Goddess saysNovember 13, 2008 at 2:12 pm
I thought it was a cat statue. You know how creepy people put them on their roofs? like fake owls and cats? How come you never see fake babies on the roof? Just asking.
Ginny saysNovember 13, 2008 at 2:30 pm
I thought it was a possum! A few weeks ago there was a possum ‘patroling’ our carport and front deck. He/She just walked from one to the other. I know this because my daughter and granddaughter were in their car, in the driveway for who knows how long because neither would get out and scare the possum away. Thought maybe this was a roof patroling possum.
Chesapeake Bay Woman saysNovember 13, 2008 at 2:38 pm
Between the snow falling down through the skylight near Bossy’s bed and the killer vermin on the roof just outside her window, it’s a wonder Bossy gets a wink of sleep at all.
No wonder she wears the bristles off her toothbrush.
jp saysNovember 13, 2008 at 2:40 pm
Actually, I was think Armadillo!
trinity2 saysNovember 13, 2008 at 2:41 pm
why not just go over there and pry that silver-rat-thingy-thing off the roof and throw it into the lake – that is, if there’s a lake nearby….or, is it that you like it and hope to go to the psycho ward on a wheeled thingy?
Kristi saysNovember 13, 2008 at 2:51 pm
It looks like a tailless iguana to me.
Amanda saysNovember 13, 2008 at 3:14 pm
I do this frequently with the same object until I finally just move it. I can see why you’d have this problem and why going next door and asking the neighbors if you could disguise their ventadillo so it doesn’t startle you every day might not excite you in terms of not having your neighbors think you’re a loon! It’s okay Bossy, we understand you!
Andrea's Sweet Life saysNovember 13, 2008 at 3:28 pm
My question is, WHY did someone create a roof vent that looks like an armadillo? Especially one with beady eyes that look right through BOSSY’s bedroom window?
And I also wonder, does BOSSY have a similar armadillo shaped vent on the roof of her OWN house?
Lo saysNovember 13, 2008 at 3:30 pm
I don’t blame you…
Corinne saysNovember 13, 2008 at 3:39 pm
My first thought…Oh my Bossy’s neighbor’s fat lizard got out on the roof!!!
Nancy saysNovember 13, 2008 at 3:56 pm
That is just creepy. Vent…my ass…that’s no vent. It is DEFINITELY a gray creature on their roof. Pull down the shade or close the curtains or you’ll be staring at that thing all day.
NellyFrittata saysNovember 13, 2008 at 4:11 pm
I once had a purse made out of an armadillo. It had rhinestone eyes. I miss it.
Heide saysNovember 13, 2008 at 4:13 pm
The other day on my way home to my apartment in Washington Heights an actual rat ran out of a pile of garbage and straight at my feet. I leapt up in the air and shrieked like a little girl, the rat scurried away, and then I looked around in embarrassment to make sure nobody heard me.
amberstar saysNovember 13, 2008 at 4:31 pm
I know this is a weird question, but have you asked your next door neighbors what the heck it is? It is very odd looking for sure.
Rachael saysNovember 13, 2008 at 4:34 pm
Oh my gosh, that would totally freak me out all the time. It totally looks like a creature.
apeetsmom saysNovember 13, 2008 at 4:52 pm
I totally got distracted by it before you even said what it was! I didn’t think silver rat though – it’s too big. I thought silver RACOON! You should tell your neighbor to put some eyes and a tail on it!
Sheryl W saysNovember 13, 2008 at 5:00 pm
definitly a modern roof turtle.
dexter saysNovember 13, 2008 at 5:46 pm
A neighbor of mine had that exact silver vent rat. He claims it killed his wife
Dyan saysNovember 13, 2008 at 6:21 pm
It’s so good to know I’m not the only one seeing these things!
tj saysNovember 13, 2008 at 6:48 pm
…Congrat’s ‘Annie’! Enjoy your new, um, toothbrush! ;o)
…Seriously Bossy, I thought that was a raccoon. Everytime I look at it, I see raccoon. Not a vent. Racoon. That’d drive me nuts… :oD
Mr Farty saysNovember 13, 2008 at 7:12 pm
You should ask your neighbors if they can replace that scary squirreladillo with something that belongs on a roof, like a gargoyle.
Lori saysNovember 13, 2008 at 7:31 pm
It’s a fossilized bat creepily emerging from the rear-end of a fossilized armadillo.
Wendy saysNovember 13, 2008 at 7:39 pm
I thought it was a raccoon, but not a normal one since its tail wasn’t striped. So it must be some weird alien-mutant raccoon, constantly running down the roof. Wonder where he’ll jump next?
Ree (the other one) saysNovember 13, 2008 at 8:05 pm
Dude. Raccoon. Seriously. And I’ve only had 1.5 vodka/limeades. And they were weak. Seriously.
deb saysNovember 13, 2008 at 9:00 pm
I wouldn’t tell the doctors unless the rat talks to you. Or, you know, gives you messages with hand signals.
Chicky Chicky Baby saysNovember 13, 2008 at 9:32 pm
Holy crap! It’s a silver rat!
I don’t care what you say about a vent or some other nonsense. That is a huge silver rat and its looking right into your bedroom window, fer chrissake.
goblinbox saysNovember 13, 2008 at 9:34 pm
Oh Bossy, Bossy, Bossy. Those neighbors, they are clearly trying to kill you! BURN THEIR HOUSE DOWN!
janet saysNovember 13, 2008 at 9:42 pm
I can’t make this look like a vent.
And I, too, ALWAYS click on “comments” instead of “keep reading” and it makes me SO MAD. How stoopid am I? But who would want to go to comments already after reading so little? I think you should move that.
Know what I love? How you make the first word of the continued post red so we can find our place quickly and easily. Okay. That’s enough, Janet. Shut up.
rb saysNovember 13, 2008 at 9:58 pm
I have a paint imperfection right on my bedroom wall that my brain sees as a spider about five times a day. I hate spiders.
(p.s. one time, there actually was a real spider on top of the paint spider, and I just about died.)
Camille saysNovember 13, 2008 at 10:47 pm
There’s a plastic grocery sack in the tree outside my kitchen window. I don’t know how it got there–wind, I guess. Every time I do dishes, I think I see a grocery sack in the tree, and I’m RIGHT. It’s been there for two months and I’m never moving it. If it wants to come down it can figure it’s own way out.
Laura saysNovember 13, 2008 at 10:53 pm
I thought it was a raccoon, then an armadillo. I am startled on a daily basis by finding MY OWN DOG waiting for me outside the bathroom. Can we get a group rate on the loony bin?
julie saysNovember 13, 2008 at 11:14 pm
I see a squirrel and, seriously, do you have a lot of southern readers because I have never even SEEN an armadillo or a lizard all wandering around and able to get a roof so that wouldn’t occur to me. But I would expect it to be a squirrel or rat.
My office phoen sits at my left elbow when I’m at the computer and every now and then I SWEAR I see the yellow light flash to say I have a message and I stop and look adn watch it and…no. Does that earn me a room nearby?
Also, there’s a old frayed piece of rope looped in my basement that’s just far enough away that I keep thinking one of the sections that’s frayed is an ENORMOUS spider. To the point that I’ve made my husband go look at least a dozen times and he reports back what it is, I go look at it and confirm it, and yet a week later—dude, is that a spider???
the cheap chick saysNovember 13, 2008 at 11:33 pm
DUDE. I totally thought it was one of those nightmare dealies from that horror movie, “They,” only gray and shiny, not black and slimy.
Icky and very disturbing either way. I recommend blowing up your neighbor’s house. Unless you like them – in which case, ask them to change out their freaky vent cover.
Victoria saysNovember 13, 2008 at 11:35 pm
I thought it was an armadillo.
Karen (submommy) saysNovember 14, 2008 at 2:32 am
That’s not a vent….it’s totally a rat.
Got some space on the gurney? Maybe an extra?
Melanie @ MelADramatic Mommy saysNovember 14, 2008 at 3:58 am
The creep factor is very high.
MariaV saysNovember 14, 2008 at 7:01 am
It does look like some sort of animal. Perhaps, we will be in the psych ward with you.
marchelle saysNovember 14, 2008 at 9:58 am
Was the roofing contractor out of normal, square shaped vents? That’s just creepy and weird!
marchelle saysNovember 14, 2008 at 9:59 am
Oh and Bossy? My first thought was “How’d that iguana get up there?”
Avitable saysNovember 14, 2008 at 11:27 am
That’s clearly a raccoon. And it’s freaky looking!
k23 saysNovember 14, 2008 at 11:44 am
I thought it was an armadillo!! (or maybe somebody’s pet iguana). I’m the same way – totally freaking over the same thing daily – It’s a whole new world every minute!
Jenni D. saysNovember 14, 2008 at 11:51 am
That would drive me crazy, too. See you in the psych ward, Bossy!
DONNA saysNovember 14, 2008 at 12:21 pm
Is it always there in the excat same spot everyday?
Heather B saysNovember 14, 2008 at 2:17 pm
My first thought was…Man that is a HUGE squirrel…what kinda nuts do they have around there!
JennyM saysNovember 14, 2008 at 3:34 pm
I thought it was the fattest squirrel ever. But I feel you — there’s a tree I pass on my way to work every morning. EVERY MORNING, that looks just like a person standing by the side of the road. And every morning, I think, why is that person standing on the side of the road? Did their car break down? Where is their car? Oh, it’s that tree. So I’ll see you in the psych ward.
Caroline Wright saysNovember 14, 2008 at 4:27 pm
Holy crap. I looked at it and thought MUTANT SQUIRREL ON STEROIDS.
I mean, I REALLY THOUGHT THAT!!! Maybe I should go to the psych ward too.
Janet saysNovember 14, 2008 at 10:56 pm
From the first couple of pix, I thought it was a gray squirrel; then the closeup turned it into an iguana. I swear I’ve never ever seen a vent like that. I really, seriously think there’s a creature on that roof!
Helen E. H. Madden saysNovember 15, 2008 at 8:06 am
Congrats! You are now officially in the same category as William Shatner and John Lithgow, who also saw strange freaky things whenever they looked out a window, only their window was on a plane, and they were just actors in a Twilight Zone episode. If you start to hear Rod Serling talk about you, run Bossy, run!
Martie saysNovember 15, 2008 at 8:01 pm
*THAT* is freaky. And I’ve actually been in the looney bin–and seeing a silver rat like creature would definatley qualify you for a week stay there…
Stephanie saysNovember 16, 2008 at 12:58 am
It’s obviously a silver squirrel/armadillo hybrid.
meleah rebeccah saysNovember 16, 2008 at 2:55 pm
“Because that’s the way Bossy rolls, where rolls equals she hopes when the psych ward comes, they roll her out on a gurney.”
I have tears of laughter running down my face …. THAT WAS HYSTERICAL.
I dont know how you do it!
h. saysNovember 17, 2008 at 5:45 pm
Put me in the iguana camp… I saw big lizard on the roof, and wondered if it regularly escaped from home next door.
kate saysNovember 18, 2008 at 2:20 am
clearly it’s a silver squirrel thingy. not a vent/rat.