You are looking at Bossy’s husband’s hand, and in that hand is his latest project. Just a little something he whipped up in his free time spent not removing mushrooms from backyards.
Here’s the deal: you know how grocery stores and office supply stores and drugstores and video stores and sister mercy too many stores require you to carry some sort of discount club card or store saver card or membership card and sister mercy too many cards?
And of course the worst part is that the store will not give you the discount if you don’t have one of these many cards, which isn’t really a discount at all but rather the regular price but please gah do not get Bossy started about that brand of ridiculousness.
And so you have to carry these many cards around, and when fumbling for them in her wallet Bossy is all, “Is this it? No that’s a library card. Is this it? No, that’s the AAA card,” until she loses all will to live.
Enter Bossy’s husband: he took all of those cards to a copy center and then he, yeah, that would be copied them. And then he stood there at one of those little stations and cut out all of the bar codes using the store’s Swine Flu scissors. And then he borrowed the store’s Swine Flu glue stick to assemble all of them in one place, labeling each bar code with an initial so the correct one can be scanned in the corresponding store. And then he xeroxed that and cut the results down to the size of a card, which he then laminated with the help of the store’s Swine Flu laminator.
And while he was at it, he made two copies — one for Bossy, since they share all of the same stores and discount clubs and memberships! Oh wait, no he didn’t.
What have you been up to, Poverty Party guests?