This sleeveless tunic.
It’s hanging in a high-end store in center city Philadelphia, and OK, Bossy will just go ahead and say it: Barney’s Co-Op.
Bossy’s friend Vuboq pointed it out to Bossy the last time he was visiting, the day they picked up Marky Mark — and back then Bossy tried it on but it was a little too tight and she lost all will to live at the thought of trying it in a larger size and also it was a lot of money, even on the sale rack, which is the only rack Bossy frequents and they love when you do that in Barney’s.
But the other day, there was Bossy hanging out with her gays, and suddenly they found themselves back in Barney’s Co-op after a drink. A drink times three. And this time the dress was on the super duper sale rack, except now only available in one of those mocking sizes that are all the rage these days, like 0.
But my how Bossy loved you, sleeveless tunic.
I hear it calling to you, “Bossy … Bossseeeee … Buy me … I’m cute … Buy meeeeeee….”
I am visualizing you wearing that on Oprah, right after the No Book Tour. Her people will find it for you in the right size. (are you SURE that one didn’t fit, skinny minny?)
It’s like the signs on the inside of the door of the dressing rooms at TJMaxx. “You know you want it.”
Oh I so miss Barney’s Co-op! They have one in D.C. but not here in Denver where the peeps ain’t so fashion forward!
How can zero even be a size?