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Again With The Photoshop Tutorial: Deborah Jean Palfrey.

Deborah Jean Palfrey is the D.C. Madam facing federal charges for running a prostitution ring in our nation’s capital.

Servicing 10,000 clients in a thirteen-year period, Deborah Jean Palfrey ran her business from her California home. Pausing only for the occasional half-hour break, Palfrey’s day stretched from 8 in the morning to 11 at night, while she continuously made and received customer phone calls that typically lasted under three minutes each.

Her recently released phone records reveal that her clients were doctors, lawyers, congressmen, technology professionals, lobbyists, college professors, Capital Hill staffers, sports insiders, activists, and government contractors — the majority of them married and living in Maryland and Virginia’s leafy suburbs.

Deborah Jean Palfrey was the quintessential successful small business owner. Which is why it’s so sad that this became her internationally syndicated press shot:

DC_madam

So Bossy thought she would help her out with her Photoshop hack job mad skillz.

The first thing Bossy needs to address is the flyaway hair. Bossy selects the eyedropper tool to establish the background color and then replaces the fly-away hair using the paintbrush tool:

removing_hair

This is the result of the first change:

DC_madam2

Next Bossy needs to get rid of the Copyright. This is absolutely illegal fine
so quit calling the police worrying:

getty

Now we have this:

DC_madam3

With the copyright removed What copyright? Let’s give her eyes some attention. First open a duplicate layer:

duplicate_Layer

Then select the dodge tool.

dodge_tool

Then open a new window for the Duplicate Layer so you can magnify the eye in order to work on it. Press your little circle thingy all over the eyeball to bring it to life:

doing_eye

This is a certain D.C. Madam after her right eye has been manipulated. Look at the difference between that and her corpse eye left eye!

corpse_eye

Next Bossy will give the tart entrepreneur a new lipstick color because Bossy’s friend Martha says subtle lips are in and if anyone knows subtle it’s Martha because here she is:

martha

Anyway. First we need to select the lasso tool:

lasso_tool

Next we need to lasso all around the lips:

lasso_lip

Then we need to get our asses over to the Replace Color window:

replace_color

Grab the first eyedropper tool and click it in the field of color you want to replace:

replace_color_real

Next, this:

new_color

Bossy used the same technique to change Deborah Jean Palfrey’s shirt color and this is what we have so far:

DC_madam7

Poor Deborah Jean Palfrey. It’s hard work arranging all that fecking those escorts but Photoshop contends you don’t have to look sleazy exhausted. So Bossy grabs the dodge tool again to reduce the dark circles under her eyes:

dodge_tool_again

Then she adjusts her dodge tool settings:

shadows

And once again Bossy gets busy dotting the area she needs to lighten:

bags

This is Miss Palfrey after jail time the under-eye bags are removed:

DC_madam9

Next Bossy fiddles a bit with Deborah Jean’s smile and voilà the completed before and after comparison:

snoop_madam

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Comments

  1. Your mad skillz astound me. You should work for vogue and make all those anorexic models…well, more anorexic looking. She should be proud you made so many awesome improvements. Snoop Dog would be proud.

  2. I saw the resemblance to Snoop right away, but thanks to your awesomeness, you really brought it to the forefront.

    Your patience astounds me.
    .

  8. Dearest Bossy,

    Tre Magnifique!! A shortcut?? Play around with the “clone stamp” and the “band-aid / healing tool”. These things make saggy under-eye transformation and erasure of (ahem) copyright stamps a snap! No more messy eyedropper tool!

    I would like to see you work on J-lo’s budunk adunk next…

  13. It’s been said, already— GENIUS. Bossy is da blog genius.

    Don’t you wonder if she ever got any?

    I’m just saying….arranging all that f*ing might have made her…. well, anyway.

  15. I was all paying attention and stuff, thinking “Maybe I should write some of this down.” Then I got to the end – does anyone know how to get red wine stains out of an i-mac?
    You.Are.Funny!

  17. Watching you learn photoshop is like watching the Lawnmower Man gradually go from being retarded to being a super-genius.

  26. Bossy, you are a GENius.

    Plus, I thought of you when I opened up photocorelshopdraw or whatever it’s called today.

    I was just photoshopping my pajama-clad self out of an adorable baby shot to put on my blog, but I felt POWERFUL.

    Like Bossy.

  28. Mr. Fabulous: When you say that it sounds so dirty.

    Everyone else: thanks for your support. Especially since Bossy still can’t “Magic-Wand” a pimple away. Serious Oy.

  30. Thanks so much for the tutorial…
    and the laughs!!!

    You are the funniest blogger I read, I like you wicked, wacked sense of humor.

    Have a blast in Chicago.