Tim Gunn’s show premiered on Bravo last night and Bossy grew a headache taking pictures of her TV captured the event for her readers reader.
Each episode begins when the Subject is ambushed by a phone call explaining that she’s been selected for Tim Gunn’s makeover.
Then they follow the Subject back to her house and make her try on a few of her typical outfits and parade around the living room:
And then Tim Gunn and former model and fashion accomplice Veronica Webb sit in their Bravo studio and analyze the Subject by saying things like, “Her wardrobe is egregiously bad.”
Next they sift through all the clothes in the Subject’s closet and throw everything into four piles: Keepers Lenders Throw-Aways and Give-Aways.
Tim Gunn’s basic motto is Everything In Fashion Comes Down To Silhouette, Proportion, and Fit. Bossy would add: Spandex and Money:
Next they assigned a Style Coach to address the subject’s psychological motivations:
And then Tim Gunn detailed the importance of owning Ten Essential Items: the Black Dress, the Classic White Shirt, the Blazer, the Trench Coat, the Day Dress, the Sweat Suit Alternative, Jeans, a Skirt, Classic Dress Pants, and a Cashmere Sweater.
Next the Subject was whisked away on a shopping spree and then marched to pricey hair and high-end makeup. The end results were staggering:
And finally the Subject’s family gathers in one room for the Big Reveal:
bossys boss says
September 7, 2007 at 10:31 ammore info than you’d like to know about the back of your thighs?
That’s why they’re in the back. duh.
You can call me, 'Sir' says
September 7, 2007 at 10:36 amY’know, by writing about the show, you’re only encouraging them to keep it on the air, where it’ll continue sucking the will to live out of society’s collective soul (good band!).
Oh, Bossy. So irresponsible.
vuboq says
September 7, 2007 at 10:46 amI wish one of my neighbors [Tomokito, I’m looking at you!] would hurry up and order cable so I could watch Bravo! I loves me some Tim Gunn and Project Runway.
DD says
September 7, 2007 at 10:57 amObviously Bravo was unable to get Stacy and Clinton from TLC, because really? What’s the difference? Well, besides Stacy not being a transvestite.
mp says
September 7, 2007 at 11:00 amSo instead of Stacy and Clinton they give you a 3D of your body and a garbage bag. Hmm..the Ben guy is kinda cute..not as cute as Clinton though. Hmmm, I think I may need to check this out.
Assertagirl says
September 7, 2007 at 11:03 amUgh. Shows like that make me want to shove a knitting needle in my eye.
Also happy that I do own what they consider to be the essential clothing items. Except for the trench coat. I’m no flasher.
The Domestic Goddess says
September 7, 2007 at 11:18 amI love these shows. They want to “bring out people’s best” and in the process completely insult the person, make fun of their clothing and hair and then take away everything they own (including the Lucky Jeans they found at Goodwill for $6) and send them out to buy things that cost about 4X what they are accustomed to spending.
I wanna be on one of those someday.
Alice says
September 7, 2007 at 11:21 ami love me some tim gunn as well! but if i were the chick being made over, i’d be really concerned that a model with such a terrible haircut was in charge of The New Me.
Queeny says
September 7, 2007 at 11:45 amI, for one, can’t get enough of those fashion fixer-upper shows, but I rarely have the time to view them. Thanks for showing me what I’ll be missing this season.
Isabelle says
September 7, 2007 at 11:54 amI personally like the moment when Veronica looks the victim in the eye and says, as if she were accusing her of murder: “I’m going to need to look at your underwear drawer.” As if it’s a crime scene investigation.
Steph says
September 7, 2007 at 12:01 pmVeronica would have died of a heart attack on the spot if she saw my underwear drawer. I’m still wearing the same stretched out old drawers I had before I was pregnant, while I was pregnant and after. My son is now 14 months old!!! Gah!
mothergoosemouse says
September 7, 2007 at 12:32 pmThat trash bag and limp wrist shot is the best.
Sassy says
September 7, 2007 at 12:40 pmOoh ! Trashbag dresses are in again? Squee ! I can start wearing mine again !!
Nilsa S. says
September 7, 2007 at 12:52 pmStacy and Clinton put Tim to shame. This show was a joke. I only watched the second half and was glad I better spent my time for the first half. (Not so) Bravo fails at their attempt to ride the Project Runway train. Hopefully Tim doesn’t begin to shamelessly plug his own show in the next season of PR … then, I might just give up on the enterprise altogether.
velocibadgergirl says
September 7, 2007 at 1:08 pmI love Tim Gunn, so I’d probably watch him talk about the info on the back of the cereal box on his kitchen table.
However, watching a season 2 Project Runway marathon on Bravo yesterday was a little bit more fun than the Guide to Style show. I was all, “OMG Tim Gunn SAID ‘ASS’!!”
Howard says
September 7, 2007 at 1:18 pmI’m your only reader? That’s sad.
But otherwise, isn’t this like the 32nd incarnation of this show?
qt says
September 7, 2007 at 1:18 pmI stopped reading when you said fabulous shoes – I need to go shopping!
Paige Jennifer says
September 7, 2007 at 1:21 pmYeah, um, not to be bitchy but Veronica Webb was talentless ten years ago. Who on earth thought she’d be worthwhile in front of the camera now? And while I lovelovelove Tim Gunn more than my own mother, his method of speech combined with her robotic delivery of useless commentary led me to refill my glass of wine three too many times. Don’t even get me started on that pimple faced so called coach who finds the answer to inner beauty via Hefty plastic bags.
rb says
September 7, 2007 at 1:30 pmEver since Project Runway I have had a huge crush on Tim Gunn in the way only a hetero girl can have on a gay man. I want him to be my gay boyfriend. I want to go to drinks with him and dish on everyone. I want to hear him talk about how much he loved Wicked. I want to hear about his boyfriend troubles. I want him to tell me what lipstick to wear and what the hell to do with my hair.
So of course I TiVo’d the show & loved every minute. Go Tim!!!
Chuckles says
September 7, 2007 at 1:47 pmDo I really need a little black dress?
Manic Mommy says
September 7, 2007 at 2:00 pmI think he looks a lot more like Paul Rudd than Ben Ass-lick.
http://news.softpedia.com/images/news2/Michelle-Pfeiffer-Never-to-be-Paul-Rudd-s-Woman-3.jpg
You be the judge.
Stacey says
September 7, 2007 at 2:22 pmUgh, pointy shoes! It looks like everyone will live happily ever after.
I am loving your blog, Bossy! I just found it yesterday.
Mary Alice says
September 7, 2007 at 2:33 pmSo, the silhouette of your body, do they take you to the airport and make you go through the little airport x-ray machine that shows your nekkidness in all it’s glory? Is that how they get that image? And did they whiten her teeth? Because I hear that makes you look 10 years younger.
superblondgirl says
September 7, 2007 at 3:03 pmAh, those wet, non-dry tears. They show true emotion. I want cable now!! I loved Project Runway when we had cable. I also want 3 new pairs of cute shoes.
Nap Warden says
September 7, 2007 at 3:47 pmHmmm…where have I seen this before? What Not to Wear, anyone? Not very original Tim Gunn, don’t quit your day job (Project Runway).
Biddy says
September 7, 2007 at 4:39 pmi think i’ll stick to “what not to wear” which is pretty much just like this…
Cece says
September 7, 2007 at 4:48 pmMy body does enough 3D stuff on its own and doesn’t need to be 3D’d out on a big ass screen. Yikes!
Amy says
September 7, 2007 at 4:51 pmDid he really say “This is a whole lot of nasty.”?
soNOTcool says
September 7, 2007 at 5:48 pmI heart Tim Gunn and BOSSY equally.
Mrs. Chicky says
September 7, 2007 at 6:15 pmFer chrissake, don’t forget about the wedding ring! How the hell did that fit in to the overall theme??
Kristen says
September 7, 2007 at 7:34 pmI have dry tears all day long.
Mr Farty says
September 7, 2007 at 8:08 pmYep, sounds like Trinny and Susannah on crack.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trinny_and_Susannah
VW better not come looking in my underwear drawer, that’s all I’m sayin’.
psychomom says
September 7, 2007 at 8:44 pmpsychomom can not control how she is percieved.
psychomom can only control how she is presented.
psychomom need a sun dress to present her sunny side.
Suebob says
September 7, 2007 at 10:22 pmBossy has more style in her clavicle than Tim Gunn has in his whole wardrobe.
Bossy makes a digital camera look like the hottest accessory this Fall.
Bossy does not need to worry about her thighs.
Bossy has it going on.
jessica says
September 7, 2007 at 11:29 pmIf only I got Bravo… Instead I must contend with What Not to Wear on TLC. Though that Stacy’s a hot bitch.
FENICLE says
September 7, 2007 at 11:35 pmI watched too. I loved when the lingerie store lady told her she had a nice ass!! Uncomfortable party of 1?
my minivan is faster than yours says
September 7, 2007 at 11:50 pmBossy, I don’t have anything special to add. I just wanted you to know I send my love.
Have a great weekend. I would ONLY copy & paste this much for you 🙂
Gloria says
September 8, 2007 at 7:45 amSomething tells me you’re getting tired of the better-than-thou attitude some ‘well-meaning’ makeover-er pounds on makeover-ee…
Audubon Ron says
September 8, 2007 at 8:17 amAudubon Ron was here – Styl’in. I learned all the fashion sense I need to know from Larry the Cable Guy. Take a shirt, cut off the sleeves up to the armpit, put fishin lures in your hat. You’re set, outfit with assessories.
Really, I hate those shows. I really, really do.
K says
September 8, 2007 at 4:09 pmCashmere… makes me itchy just thinking about it.
That silhouette idea would be enough to keep me from signing release forms.
mcewen says
September 8, 2007 at 5:38 pmSo in your professional opinion, is this better or worse than ‘what not to wear’ if you happened to be wearing your non-ethnocentric executive hat?
Cheers
Mrs. Chicken says
September 8, 2007 at 6:15 pmoh my god you got everything EXACTLY RIGHT! We said the same thing about her being “surprised” with a huge camera in her face. And the dry tear thing had us in hysterics.
Bossy, I know you hear this 20 times a day, but you are so funny!
OMSH says
September 9, 2007 at 12:36 amWill you do this weekly? Because I don’t have TV over here in the sticks and watching it with you and your IKEA near warms my soul.
Oh, The Joys says
September 9, 2007 at 2:32 pmWhose guide to style?
Jayne says
September 10, 2007 at 6:17 amUgh… they have a show like that here in the UK called “What Not To Wear”, and I cannot fathom why anyone would want to go on it.
Cuz remember, “It’s not how you feel… it’s how you loooook.”
Welcome to the 80’s revisited.
Cindy Z says
September 10, 2007 at 1:45 pmAll my clothes would be gone and silhouette, haaaaaaaaa
Lisalisa says
September 10, 2007 at 2:37 pmI love love love Tim Gunn but he deserves a better show. I miss Laura Bennett too. Runway 3 can’t start soon enough.
Congrats on the new address!
surcie says
September 10, 2007 at 9:36 pmAlthough I love Tim Gunn, I felt so bad for the guinea pig girl the whole time. I must be really co-dependent.
erin says
September 10, 2007 at 10:18 pmOMG…he DOES look like Ben Afflack!
Elizabeth says
September 11, 2007 at 8:46 amI watched this show too. The subject (whose name I forget) kept saying “I’m not comfortable with my CURVES”. And then the underwear lady said she had a nice butt! That was awesome. I need an underwear lady. I liked when she said your bra should make your boobs hit exactly halfway between your elbow and your shoulder. You mean, they aren’t supposed to touch my belly button? Really? Hmmm.
Please do this every week. Thanks. 🙂
Elizabeth says
September 11, 2007 at 8:47 amOh, and I forgot to say, Tim Gunn’s Ten Essential Items list? I just did a book review for Parent Bloggers Network of the book “The Little Black Book of Style”, written by Nina Garcia, Project Runway judge and ELLE mag fashion director. Yeah, those Ten Essential Items are from HER BOOK.
Criquette says
September 11, 2007 at 2:53 pmI have been known to tell Mr. C that if I were a gay man, I’d leave him for Tim Gunn in a heartbeat. Mr. C isn’t sure how to take this comment. I agree with your rundown: the show sucks but I still love the Big Gunn.
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