Meet Jackie Warner. She’s owns this and stars in Bravo’s reality show Work Out. In the time it takes the average woman to gain eleven pounds eating Convenience Store breakfast foods wrapped in microwaved foil, Jackie designed her own line of workout clothes, launched a fat camp, and converted at least two heterosexual women although Jackie herself would rather grow cellulite than screw a man.
All this launching and converting builds quite the appetite. Which is why Jackie begins each day with a Protein Shake. The recipe for Jackie Warner’s Protein Shake is sold on eBay but because Bossy adores her readers reader she is going to give it to you for for free. All you need is $56 to buy the crap ingredients
a blender.
First you take 1 scoop of Mega Green Powder
Add 1 serving of Whey Protein Powder
1 tablespoon of Flaxseed Oil
1 tablespoon of Liquid Amino Acid
2 cups of Organic Mixed Berries (fresh or frozen)
1 cup of Ice.
Thank gah this recipe doesn’t call for the Psyllium Husk Powder
Anyway. Blend well, pour, own, star, design, launch, and convert.
vuboq says
May 16, 2007 at 9:14 amI only recognize two of the ingredients (berries, ice). The others sound scary. Mega Green Powder? Does it turn you into the Incredible Hulk? eek.
Jodi says
May 16, 2007 at 9:21 amActually, this show should have been on my guilty pleasures list, but it is among many that I watch solo and I didn’t list those (read: really guilty pleasures). On one episode, she listed the ingredients (but not the specific amounts of each) and I jotted them down. I haven’t tried it yet.
Have you?
Chuckles says
May 16, 2007 at 10:29 amThis channel is right below the SciFi channel on my cable service. I have seen a few seconds of this show and I find it odd. It seems like a reality show consisting solely of watching this woman work out. This is somehow totally uninteresting to me.
This post is the opposite however. It’s funny and thus interesting.
Sarah (In the Trenches of Mommyhood) says
May 16, 2007 at 10:53 amI’m a reality show junkie and this is one I don’t miss. Jackie is strangely fascinating to me. And I definitely agree that she uses something funky in her hair to make it all sticky-up. Maybe it’s the liquid amino acid?
Tracey says
May 16, 2007 at 11:16 amThanks, I think I’ll pass. Mega Green Powder sounds too frightening for me. Like vubog, I’d be afraid of turning into the incredible hulk. I wouldn’t mind being incredible, but the hulk part? No, no. Not for me.
BTW…congrats on the BCA nomination. I voted, and posted a link for you today =)
Domestic Goddess says
May 16, 2007 at 11:42 amUh, no thanks. I’ll stick with my veggie sausage patty with a slice of cheese on a whole-grain english muffin, thankyouverymuch.
As for her hair, perhaps you aren’t supposed to DRINK the shake. Maybe it is a recipe for her hair gel.
MamaMaven says
May 16, 2007 at 12:34 pmOh I am so into that show as a guilty pleasure. I’d like those abs but don’t think I could possibly choke that down to make it happen. I was hoping it would happen by osmosis while watching the show, that hasn’t happened either. Anyone else notice how little actual working out there is??
Ava Von Snarky says
May 16, 2007 at 1:17 pmI love you bossy, and not in a heterosexual conversion to lesbian way either. I will only drink her protein drink if her abs and thighs spontaneously erupt from my body, and I never have to deal with my soft wobbly bit again, otherwise the deal is off.
Mrs. Chicky says
May 16, 2007 at 1:33 pmIf it don’t come in a greasy paper wrapper then it ain’t natural. Or American. I think Communists drink those shakes.
Although, if I could get abs like that I’d gladly join the Communist party. Hey, any party is a good party with rock hard abdominals.
Evanzstox says
May 16, 2007 at 1:41 pmI read “sperm”…then “protein drink”. Sorry, it kinda ruined it for me. But cute hair!
Oh, The Joys says
May 16, 2007 at 2:04 pmDoes the shake come with the shiny bikini?
Andrea says
May 16, 2007 at 3:10 pmUmmmmm…yuck? Except the berries. Mega green powder sounds like something I should put on my yard.
maggie says
May 16, 2007 at 3:16 pmUm, can I substitute yogurt for the Mega Green Powder, Whey Protein Powder, Flaxseed Oil and Liquid Amino Acid? Or better yet, ice cream?
shayera says
May 16, 2007 at 3:27 pmThat makes me kind of nauseous just reading about it. I’m going to stick to my waffles and tea morning starter!
Rhea says
May 16, 2007 at 4:11 pmI love Jackie’s reality show. Now, SHE’S bossy.
Jason says
May 16, 2007 at 4:21 pmThanks for the recipe. I love her series on Bravo. I could use the extra “oompf” in the morning from a good protein drink. O.K., I was not trying to be dirty. Seriously.
Noelle says
May 16, 2007 at 4:22 pmI can’t believe that humans have made it this far as a species without Psyllium Husk Powder being widely available.
metalmom says
May 16, 2007 at 4:32 pmMEGA GREEN IS PEOPLE !!!!!!!!
nutmeg says
May 16, 2007 at 5:19 pmYea, but she’s freaking HOT!
Kelly says
May 16, 2007 at 8:18 pmKristen and I admitted to having a crush on Jackie.
She’s delightful, in the way that a hot lesbian woman can be to a happily married mother of two with no such inclinations.
No, sir.
Jen M. says
May 16, 2007 at 9:14 pmHa! She is bossy! You two could kind of be sisters. I wish I could be the healthy, green shake-drinking kind of gal. I give myself a lot of credit for whole grain wraps.
Dexter says
May 17, 2007 at 7:50 amI think some of those ingredients are what’s in Scotts late spring lawn treatment
tongue in cheek says
May 17, 2007 at 4:49 pmIn France a stomach like that is called, “a tablette du chocolate.” (rippling muscles better known as a six pack right?) I don’t she ever eats chocolate and that my stomach will ever look like that………..
lady macleod says
May 17, 2007 at 8:01 pmtoo funny. she is rather frightening..
Heels says
May 23, 2007 at 9:09 amThe mom of another kindergartener in my daughter’s class is a dead ringer for Jackie, only hetero.
She’s a total knockout. I am jealous of her physique, but not quite enough to do much about mine own.
Jodi says
June 1, 2007 at 9:06 pmThanks to (your) Technorati (poem), I found the link to me in this post.
Wow, I sure am slow to catch on.
Laila says
June 5, 2007 at 8:14 amI didn’t catch the amounts of the ingredients either, so I just used the serving size on the containers. I got the Mega Green powder from GNC as well as the Liquid Amino Acids. I found the Flax Seed oil at Walmart. I already had a GNC whey protein powder. I wasn’t really feeling the berries, so I’ve been using Organic Frozen Mango from Publix. It’s awesome!!! The Mega Green powder from GNC is actually berry flavored, so it’s not too bad. Besides, after you add in the Mango, it’s awesome!
I went out and bought one of those “Magic Bullet” blender machines and its perfect for making the shake. And, after you blend it, you can just put a top on the same container that you blended it in and go!
oh no, here we go! says
August 27, 2007 at 10:23 amHey there! thinking about giving this shake a try after my baby arrives in a few weeks (so for now i’m still od’ing on bon bons) to get my health a little back on track, I have a 1 1/2 year old son too! so I will need all the energy and stamina I can get! LOL (and dealing w/ DH!)and I was just wondering if anyone knew what a reasonable serving size would be each morning…this seems to make allot. Thanks! and i’m really getting a kick outta the site!
Cheers!